(Closed) How do you honestly feel about someone not having their sister as Maid of Honor?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 45
Member
720 posts
Busy bee

I’m gonna start off with a disclaimer that I don’t have a problem with it and if you and your sister are cool with it you shouldn’t care what people think.  

That said, depending on where you are you may not get judged for it…or you may get LOTS of people talking behind your back about it.  That was THE topic of conversation at my friend’s wedding, everyone gossiping about what could have happened, whether they had a fight or a falling out or whether it was jealously and just blah blah crap.  Then again I’m in the south so take that into account…

I agree you should have whoever you want as your MoH, just be prepared to turn the music up in your head if people decide to make nasty comments

Post # 46
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think it’s a big deal, especially with her age, and your age difference. Just because you’re sisters, shouldnt’ automatically make her your MOH!

my partner was sad at first when her sister didn’t ask her to be her Maid/Matron of Honor. then, she realized that living across the country, she couldn’t be there for her in the same way her best friend could, and neither was she all that intersted in the girly shopping, dress, hair and make up stuff. so she got over it pretty quickly.

she stood next in line beside her Maid/Matron of Honor, same as you’re planning.

Post # 47
Member
1369 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I’m not close with my sister and she wasn’t Maid/Matron of Honor or Bridesmaid or Best Man, but I did ask her to be an honorary bridesmaid. She wound up not coming to the wedding because she overslept…so it worked out.

Post # 48
Member
2950 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

i wouldnt care what everyone else thought; as long as my sister and I had talked about it and she didnt care, then I wouldnt worry about making her a Bridesmaid or Best Man. Just ask another close friend!

Post # 49
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My sister is my MOH-she was my first choice, but were I to do it over again, I would just make her an honored guest and leave her out of the wedding party. I love my sister dearly, but our personalities clash and she has been SO freaking difficult through this whole process. She is a person who HAS to be to be in charge, and the fact that I’m the bride doesn’t seem to figure into her mindset. The only thing that is saving our relationship is that she lives 300 miles away.

Post # 50
Member
875 posts
Busy bee

I think it makes sense that not every sister is going to be the maid of honor.  Don’t worry about what other people think do what makes sense to you.  I still remember going to a wedding as a young teenager for a cousin of mine and his bride.  The bride’s sister was the maid of honor and spent the whole ceremony giggling.  She was somewhere around my age at the time, and looking back on it was probably so nervous that she got the giggles.  She wasn’t ready for the responsibility. 

Post # 51
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I had my sister as maid of honour and personally wouldn’t have had it any other way.  we were 26 and 23 and super close growing up, and even though she lived in aus throughout the planning process i wanted her there (and if not her I would have had to chooze between my two best friends since elementary school that are a little competitive about who’s my BEST best friend and that had potential to go ugly!)

That said I was my best friends moh over her sister in a situation similar to yours when we were 24 and the sister was 16 I think. We’d been friends longer than the sister was alive and I don’t think anybody really thought anything of it.  Its truly a personal decision and as long as you know you’ll look back and be happy with your choice hats all that matters

 

Post # 52
Member
2135 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I compromised and made my little sister and BFF of 15 years BOTH Maids of Honor!

Post # 53
Member
1348 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t have my sister as my Maid/Matron of Honor, or even a bridesmaid for that matter. We’re 6 years apart (she’s older) and I’d rather have a group who can all hang out and do the same things. She also hates getting her picture taken.

Post # 54
Member
522 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

i think you did the right thing making your Boyfriend or Best Friend Maid/Matron of Honor. My sister happens to be my best friend, but if not, i wouldn’t have picked her. i don’t see why it should be your sister, there is no need, especially after you said she douesn’t care much for planning and is away in college

Post # 55
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My twin sister won’t be my Maid/Matron of Honor.

Personally because so many people were uncomfortable/not in favour of SO’s and my relationship and thought we were “weird” and “gross” and “wrong” I wanted to pick people who have always been supportive and loving.

My twin sister thought it was wrong at first but has slowly kind of warmed up to it. We’re not super close anyways because she likes to switch in and out of bitch mode but when she’s being friendly and nice we’re pretty good friends.

Anyways my Maid/Matron of Honor is going to be the first person I told about mine and SO’s relationship who was actually happy for me and since then has wanted to hear all about my crazy wedding planning! She’s also my closest friend

Post # 56
Member
554 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m one of 3 BMs for my friend, and her sister is not in the bridal party at all. In a way I was surprised (assumed she’d have her sis & her SO’s sis as her bridal party), but knowing the sister as a person – not surprised!

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