(Closed) How do you keep the spark?

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Since our bedroom is cold and dark, when DSS is gone to his friends on the weekends, sometimes we pull the matress out to the living room (we really need a pull out couch, that thing is heavy!), light a fire, pore some wine, and sometimes we play games and sometimes we watch movies.  Clothing is optional.

Hot baths together are great too. 

When the weather is nice, we have been known to get up at the crack of dawn and go fishing just the two of us.  It is so quiet that early in the morning at the lake, with the sun just coming up over the hills.  I will admit, I think that is one of the best things we do as far as leaving the house goes (ie date).  It is just so beautiful and calming that early in the morning and it really gives a great start to a day, and usually leads to a fabulous “nap” later.

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Definitely date nights, and doing little things. Hubs is not really sappy, so he downloaded a love poem app on his phone, and will sometimes send me one out of the blue. Let me tell you, it makes my entire day!!! He always seems to know when I need it most. πŸ™‚

I’ll record his shows, and watch them with him, without complaining.

Also, we like to go for bike rides (weather permitting) around a state park that’s about a half hour away. We also fish and crab, go camping. We love food, so we will try a new restaurant, or recipe to try together

Post # 6
Member
838 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

we write each other notes if were not going to see each other in the mornings. They not super long,and dont go into huge detail but its generally just saying what we mean to each other and how we will miss the other that day. Its makes my whole day when I get home from work and see my DHs note on the side,it makes me smile like a lovesick teenager!

Post # 7
Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We watch Wheel and Jeopardy every night together. Bow chica wowow!!

 

Post # 8
Member
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We try to text…or…sext..LMAO! I will send him a morning text to say hello handsome…etc. He will send me sexy and fun texts just to make me smile! I will bring him a coke from his face place in town and surprise him at work. We leave notes in eachother’s cars…anything to keep that spark alive!

Post # 9
Member
7777 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Darling Husband is not the romantic type at all. We’ve never been super lovey-dovey.

I think we really keep the “spark” in our relationship going more through making sure we have things to talk about. Keeping the “intellectual spark” going, so to speak. Like, last night we were discussing session musicians in the 60s and 70s and how Jimi Hendrix was a session musician for Little Richard. (It’s random, I know, but Darling Husband is a musician. lol)

A nice side effect of this is that we kill when we play trivia as a team. πŸ™‚

Post # 10
Hostess
16194 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I really need to be better about this, too! We are also so prone to just hanging on the couch.

I’ve found that if I just put a little extra effort into doing my hair or maybe dress up a little bit, that it can turn a routine dinner out into a little bit of a date night. If I wear a shirt or a dress that I know my husband particularly likes, or wear my hair a way he likes. It shows that I’m thinking about him and want to look a little extra nice for him that night.

Every now and then, my husband will bring home something small to show he was thinking of me, like a latte from Starbucks or something like that.

I also find that we’re a little more energized about going out when we go somewhere new because then it’s a new thing for us to experience together. So we’ve been trying new restaurants and bars on occasion, just because it’s something out of the ordinary.

Also, I LOVE candles, and I’ve found that candlelight makes everything just a little more romantic. From dinner to watching a movie to whatever. We don’t have a fireplace, so it’s the closest we can get to nuzzling up together by a fire! πŸ™‚

Post # 11
Member
887 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Darling Husband and I are both working on graduate degrees…so if we’re both studying in the same room, we feel like we’re really doing well πŸ˜‰ Eating dinner together every night (and cooking together most nights!) is really how we connect right now. During the summers it’s a lot different, but we recognize our priorities during school. We also do hot baths together when it’s cold! And Skip-Bo (anyone remember that card game from like 15 years ago?!?!) and Scrabble on the weekends πŸ™‚

Post # 12
Member
6341 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2014

We’re not yet married but have been together over 6 years. There are loads of ways we try to keep the spark: we make sure we go on at least one holiday a year so we can just unwind and relax in luxury; we try to eat out at least once a week (sometimes it’s 2-3 times a week); we go out for drinks together; we have ‘date nights’ in (take away and a bottle of two of wine or champagne); I like to make a little extra effort with my appearance sometimes, and I’ll buy clothes I know he’ll like; we do little thoughtful things for each other eg it sounds really stuid, but he’ll buy me my favourite sweets which always keeps me happy lol.

And I know you didn’t ask about sex, but I don’t think it’s important to keep that alive too; we’ve experimented with different things, and we try to make an effort to have sex regularly, even if we’re both tired.

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