Post # 1
A friend of mine who has been married and has kept her maiden name: Ms. Jessica Abba?
Is it Ms. if you’re married and Miss if you’re single?
Women who are widows?
I’m sure I’ll have more….at least most of our guests are Mr. & Mrs!
Post # 3
also a married woman who is separated from her husband!?!
Post # 4
Married is "Mrs" (unless they prefer Ms), even if they’ve kept their maiden name. Write as: Mr. John Smith & Mrs. Jessica Abba.
Miss is if you’re single (and, generally under 18, or at the very most, under 25). Otherwise, it’s generally Ms (>25 and single/widowed/divorced, etc.).
Post # 5
I was told it’s Miss for a single woman and Ms. if you are unsure of whether or not she’s single or in any other scenario.
Post # 6
I always use Ms. if a woman is older than her early 20’s, regardless of whether she has been married or not. Personally, I do not like being addressed as Miss.
I addressed widowed women as Mrs.
Married with different names:
Ms. Jessica Alba and Mr. Cash Warren
Not married, same address:
The "and" indicates marriage. If they were not married it would read:
Ms. Jessica Alba
Mr. Cash Warren
Post # 7
It is Miss if you’re young, Ms. if your older and single, Mrs. when married and still Mrs. when you’re a widow. Those are the ones I know.
Post # 8
FYI here’s the Emily Post guide for married woman keeping her name:
I messed up a half dozen of my invites using Mrs. Keeping Maiden Name and Mr. and had to redo them.
Also, if she’s keeping her name she is listed first on the invite and then him.
Post # 9
I know I will never want to be called "Mrs" even though I am planning to change my name. I didn’t know that it was technically correct to refer to a person as "Mrs" even if they have not changed their name.
I was completely non-traditional and listed my invites as:
Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Smith
even when women had changed their names. I only used Mrs. if I thought the person would prefer it (e.g. FI’s grandmother who’s a widow would hate to be "Ms."). I don’t think I used Miss for anyone…can’t recall now. This was my minor feminist backlash against the whole process. I also put people’s name on the same line b/c I figured it’s not up to me to decide if their relationship is different to a marriage. I’m pretty sure none of that is proper etiquette, but I don’t think I offended anyone either.
I vote for "Ms." if you’re unsure or if the person is over like 20 or 25 (depending on your friends).
Post # 10
Well I did the invites already.
My friend is coming but not bringing her husband. likely i will ask her which she prefers, lol. She’s pretty feminist. Hmm, Emily Post says she should be listed Ms.
Miss sounds right for the TWO teenagers at our wedding….I’d feel weird getting a Miss card at 23. It DOES sound very teen/young.
Hmmm. This is complicated and I can’t remember how I did the invites. Some I did "the Warren Family" but only one or two of them are coming.
Here’s a toughie: a woman with a boyfriend and her child from a previous marriage. Oye. I did those this way:
"Ms. Friday Day & Guest
Miss Friday Daughter"
Post # 11
Ms. differs from Miss and Mrs. in that is does not indicate marital status. It is an alternative for women who prefer not to be defined by their relationships. It simply is a formal title of address like Mr.
Post # 12
From everything I read, Miss is appropriate for children only. Females under 16 should be addressed as Miss and males under 10 as Master.
Even though my title is changing in less than 20 days now, I still prefer "Ms. Edamame" as opposed to "Miss Edamame". For friends of mine who have addressed their invites to me as "Miss", I feel like I’m being invited to a Cotillion instead of a Wedding.
Post # 13
Wow, that’s a lot of confusion! I go by Ms. because it sounds older (and probably will still when I get married — I’m a teacher and little kids call everyone Ms). All this confusion is why I’m just addressing our invitations like I would any other mail (i.e. liz & allen jones).
Post # 14
Ms is used frequently by women who prefer not to be defined by their relationship status (Mrs/Miss) it is used by women who indentify with feminist ideologies. I come from a feminist family and we all go by Ms, regardless of married or single status.
Post # 15
Post # 16
Thanks everyone! Boy it sure is confusing!