Post # 1

Member
8 posts
Newbee
I went to my bookclub meeting last night. It was the first one I had been to since getting engaged. I intend to invite several of the ladies but not all of them. I am closer to some then others. This is where it gets tricky.
I had planned to get there early to tell the host not to mention the wedding since I wouldn’t be inviting everyone and I thought it would be weird in the long run. Traffic intervened and I got there on time but after other guests who are not on the list had arrived. I never brought up the wedding but my ring was a topic of conversation, which is another issue in itself. One of the bookclub ladies is a photographer so she asked questions about my plans. I tried really hard to defer questions until we could talk more privately or until the uninvited bookclub members had left but I wasn’t successful.
How do I not invite everyone in bookclub? How do I avoid this from happening every month from now until June?
Post # 3

Member
971 posts
Busy bee
Yikes! That’s tricky! Can you invite them ALL post-dinner for a cocktail or two and cake? That way, nobody will feel bad that they weren’t invited at all? One of my friends did that. He worked in a company with around 25 people and didn’t want to put anyone off by not inviting them all, so he just invited everyone for cocktails after dinner.
Post # 4

Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
You can not invite them by not sending them an invitation. 🙂
Mail invitations to the people you’d like to invite, and don’t bring up the wedding or elaborate on your plans with the book club. You may hurt some people’s feelings, but that tends to happen when you invite some people in a group but not all of them.
Post # 5

Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper
It has potential to be awkward and feelings will be hurt, but you just remain polite and respectful. You could also repeat the mantra of you are only having a small wedding, yadda yadda yadda. And, hopefully the women you do invite are respectful enough to not rub it in the faces of the one’s that aren’t invited (by not mentioning it, etc.)
Post # 6

Member
12 posts
Newbee
I agree with Mrs. Spaniel. Just be tactful and hope that those women you do invite will do the same. Definitely the most frustrating thing about wedding planning imo is the guest list!