Post # 1
I am totally a planner, and we haven’t figures out when to TTC. Part of me feels like we should start soon, since I am 32, but Darling Husband is working long hours for the next 17 months 1.5 hours away. We have a house and an apartment, and spend 2-4 nights a week together, depending on his work schedule. We are debating on getting a place in between in the next few months and having a 50-60 minute commute each but both work long hours- it is complicated! I don’t know whether we should aim to start TTC when he finishes his training, or if we should aim to deliver then. How important is it to have Darling Husband around a lot when I am pregnant? Complicating matters is how do you make plans for other things that do not go with being pregnant? For example, I want to sign up for a half marathon (have never run one) but I don’t want to pay the fee, make the plans, and train, only to not get to do it. What do you recommend? How do you deal with these issues?
Post # 3
Honestly I think you have to let go of planning every detail in this. I never in my wildest dreams expected to have issues getting (and staying!) pregnant, but here I am 2.5 years later. Don’t put your life on hold because of what ‘might’ happen. Decide if and when you are ready come what may and then just go for it. If you end up getting pregnant before the marathon would it really be a deal breaker to lose the fee?
Post # 4
As my married friends have all told me: There is no good time to have a baby. There is always SOMETHING that you might want to happen first, or could happen, or should happen, or might happen. There is always too much of something or not enough of something else. The best time to TTC is at a time where it might be best for you– and even then there are no guarentees that you will have a BFP your first cycle. I think the average healthy couple under 35 only have a 20% chance of BFP at any given cycle of TTC.
So find a time that MIGHT work… and start trying 🙂
Post # 5
@guitargirl: Do you live near family that could help you with a baby? My Darling Husband and I live away from our families and so I would *NEED* him around when I gave birth because he would be my only real help. Not sure about your situation, but if it were me, I’d avoid ttc until 9 months before he is scheduled to come back.
Post # 6
I totaly understand how it is hard to know when to start TTC. But like the others have said, very few people will feel like its the perfect time because you really don’t know what life will throw out you. I guess for the importance of having Darling Husband around when you are pregnant would be if there were complications (God forbid) and you had to be on bedrest. Would there be someone who could help you for weeks/months if needed?