(Closed) How do you politely ask for money?

posted 11 years ago in Family
Post # 3
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@u_c2moore: Short answer: you don’t. Asking for money is never going to be polite.

Post # 4
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would try to bring up in conversation general wedding planning info and maybe they’ll say something?  I know every time I mention putting deposits down or anything my Mom will tell me she can give me her contribution whenever.  

Post # 5
3674 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I think it’s ok to ask since they’ve already offered. I would just be straight forward and say that you need to know what you’ll be able to afford, you understand if they no longer wish to contribute, but if they would then how much.

I’m going through this with fixing up our new house now. My parents said they would like to “help out” and my dad keeps saying he’ll “probably” pay for this and that. Well that’s great, but for a lot of things we can’t afford to do it unless they pay for it. If we pay, we’d have to wait a while to save. So finally I flat out said, please tell me what you will and will not pay for b/c I’m afraid we’ll do something and then be stuck with a bill we can’t pay. They’re happy that we’re watching our money and were happy to start being more clear about it all.

Post # 6
21 posts
  • Wedding: September 2011

if they are local, invite them to come with you and help pick out things like flowers. they will likely offer to pay then and there.

Post # 7
33 posts
  • Wedding: December 2011

My Future In-Laws never said that offered anything at the beginning, but as we have gotten deeper into planning, they have offered to pay for more. The other night we were talking about the cost of postage and my Future Mother-In-Law flat out said, “I’ll take care of it.” Later she called and told me that she wanted to go with me when I went shopping for bouquets (the only flowers I want to use). She said she wanted to buy that for me. 


I guess what I would do is meet up with whoever offered to contribute and let them know that you are trying to get some of our preferred vendors booked, but that you’re not sure how much you have to spend. I would just say something like, “I remember you saying that you would like to contribute, and I have many areas in which you could help.” Then you could ask them how much they were thinking about contributing. Remind them that every little bit helps! Best of luck with this. Money is never an easy subject to talk about!!

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