(Closed) How do you politely put this on an invitation? Kind of a touchy subject…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 107
Member
582 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@musician32992:  I haven’t read the entire thread, but I read a few posts and I liked the suggestion of having a parent, or another family member let her know that if she wishes to attend the reception she’ll have to attend the ceremony as well, but of course in a much nicer tone then what I posted. x_x

Or do you feel more comfortable writing something out on the invitation? Do you think this aunt would even understand the particular wording, or do you think she’d ignore it? 

I’ve known people like your aunt, and I feel like if you only put a hint on the invite that you have to attend the ceremony to go to the reception that she’ll ignore that request, and do what she wants. 

I understand why this situation is so upsetting especially after the last wedding she attended. I am surprised you’d even invite her after that. I remember reading that since she is family you feel obligated to invite her, but it takes a lot more then that notion to still invite someone after that kudos to you for being diplomatic. 

Would you be offended if she didn’t come to your wedding/reception or would you be relieved? 

What if she doesn’t come to the ceremony, but does go to the reception? What will you do? 

Post # 109
Member
1075 posts
Bumble bee

@musician32992:  that’s like saying why should I not go to any social gathering, the belief system is nt a part of the reception just the ceremony … I cn b happy for u and respect ur marriage, it is nt just religious but legal as well. I’d go to a house warming party to celebrate if u bought a house, it’s the same concept. id b happy for u despite the fact that my religious beliefs do not permit me to attend certain things

ive been on both sides so I kno it’s slightly irritating as u want everyone to b wholeheartedly a part of ur day but religion is such an iffy subject. And honestly u cnt justify any belief with simple logic BUT respect and acceptance should b shown by both parties, it is YOUR wedding and only YOU know ur family so my opinion is simply a manifested opinion of what u revealed to us. 

Post # 111
Member
582 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@musician32992:  That is a good idea to see if the venue will close the doors after the ceremony!

I hope this all works out, this is a stressful situation. 

I wish you all the best~

Post # 112
Member
1075 posts
Bumble bee

@musician32992:  would it help if u stressed the legality part of ur union in the invite? Maybe saying please join our ceremony to emphasis the legal union of my fiancé and I on blah blah ( that was actually a really bad example lol) . We would love to see you for both the ceremony and reception which solidifies our love publically to the world! ( I’d only put that on HER invite) as it loses luster bcz u hav to express ur expectations vividly

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