- 2 weeks ago
My boyfriend (30) and I (30) have been dating about 5 months. His lease ended on his rental apartment and he’s looking for a new place July 1. We spend about 4 nights a week together, but aren’t quite at the place where we want to move in. He brought up that it is something he sees happening sooner rather than later, and what were my thoughts on him getting a six month lease, or month to month vs a year. I loved that thought. We discussed that the rental market in our area has very few shorter term leases, but that it is fairly easy to break a lease if you can find someone else who will sign a new lease (we have both broken leases in the past). We’ve had discussions about finances, and long term future plans.
I’d love to hear of different ways everyone splits expenses. I know this is a ways off, but I am a thinker and a planner and like to mull over ideas before I decide.
We make the same amount of money right now (he makes 83k, I make 85k). I am in line for a HUGE raise this year (probably will make $120k-130k), he is expecting a raise to go to about $100k.
We both have significant student loans. Mine are terrible ($95k) his are more manageable ($30k).
I have about $2,500 in credit card debt due to my company cancelling our bonus system and not receiving money I anticipated. I will either have it paid off immediately with raise, or in about 5 months (with $500/month payments). I anticipate having this paid off prior to moving in.
I drive a crappy car, have no car payments, and insurance is about $75/month. He drives a really nice car, pays ~$300/month in car payments and $250 in insurance.
I own a condo that has minimal equity (bought with 5% down, but you require 4% mortgage insurance, so I started with about 1% in equity). My down payment was $10,000. I’ve owned the condo for a year. I don’t have my mortgage documents with me, but I think during the first five years of the mortgage, only about half of the payment goes to principle. I’ve probably put ~$6000 towards the principle.
He would 100% move into my condo.
Monthly Expenses for House:
Mortgage – $970
Condo Fees – $500
Property Tax – $120
Internet – $95
Mine – $1200
His – $350
I am a fan of proportionately splitting bills and expenses. Is it reasonable to look at our net earnings, less student loans, and split proportionately that way? Student loans are what enabled both of us to get our respective jobs. I was in school for four years longer than him. To me a student loan isn’t a want, it’s a need.
If he was looking at renting a room in a shared apartment in our area it would probably be about $700-800/month. One bedrooms around around $1000-1100. I know it is my house, so I would get some benefit from contributions towards the equity, but it would be minimal.
If we got married I would eventually like to get a joint account. All the bills would come out, and we would each get some type of budget for “fun” money. Neither of us are frugal, we are both spenders so that would have to be reined in if we were thinking about having kids.
My income earning ability outweighs his (I will probably top out around $250k and he will top out around $160-175k). I would probably be on mat leave two or three times.
I want to start this as reasonable from the beginning, with talks about what we see happening the longer we reside together (i.e. greater integration of finances). Where I live the general rule is you are treated as a married couple by law for property division purposes after three years of cohabitating (with some caveats).
I’d love to hear how you split bills (yay for idea generating/creative solutions), and any thoughts you have on proportionate splitting based on our net income less student loans to start.