(Closed) how do you tell your mom “no” to something she wants when she is paying?

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
11237 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@siimplycraziie: I had this but only with how much evening food to have. I said no but she went ahead anyway and most of the food ended up going in the bin, which really upset for me a couple of weeks after the wedding even.  But hey, worse things could’ve happened. You probably need to sit her down and have a calm chat. Explain you and Fiance are grateful but this is how you envisage your day.

Post # 4
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@siimplycraziie: I agree with Prewitt… You and your Fiance should sit down with your parents, do an action plan and hash everything out then and there and let it be that way…. it will save you alot of grief in the long run

Post # 5
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I agree with PP.  My parents are paying for our wedding and at first there was a lot of tension because my parents didn’t understand how much a wedding would cost.  Then we came up with a general budget and ideas on what I wanted to do.  My parents are very aware that it is my choice and maybe my mom doesn’t agree with everything but she hasn’t said too much to make me feel guilty. My parents even ‘graded’ themselves to make sure that FH and I were the ones making all the decisions!

We did get a more expensive photographer than what my parents budgeted, so FH and I just picked up the difference.

The one thing my parents are NOT paying for is stationary because that is my FMIL’s business and she is doing it.  And she basically forces her choices on me (or at least won’t let me get some of the things I was considering).  But thats another story…

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