(Closed) How does society/media influence us… and how to stop?

posted 7 years ago in Photos/Videos
Post # 3
1855 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

1) support our children as they pursue their dreams and pursue our own in the process.  family members are always speculating as to my son’s future profession: “he’ll be a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer, a world class chef” etc.  but he might be a nurse, a paralegal, a construction worker, and diner chef.  none of these things are “bad” and encouraging development of diverse skills will help them succeed.  don’t limit girls to ballet and boys to football.  expose them to music, arts, sciences, etc. from an early age and watch them flourish, regardless of what the media is throwing at them.

2) encourage healthy eating and activities that will prevent children from having “body issues” and keep us healthy at the same time.  just because we don’t need to all be size 0’s doesn’t mean we don’t need to encourage healthy behavior.  I think people can go to far with the “everyone is special in their own way” business… especially with our children, they need to be educated on how to live a healthy/active lifestyle so they can continue it as adults.  by modeling this behavior, I guarantee you will feel better about yourself in the process.

3) identify differences to your children that make others beautiful.  skin color.  bone structure.  intelligence.  humor.  style.  anything unique.  when you’re confronted by a model/actress in the media, look for something about them that is beautiful other than their waistline.  maybe they are featured in an ad because they have interestingly shaped cheek bones, or a commitment to charity, or an interest in a sport.  it’s not all about size.  

4) emphasize the good; when we drive by the neighborhood landscaper, and my son asks what she/he is doing, I tell him that he/she is helping to keep our neighborhood beautiful and safe.  not just “doing yardwork”.  this helps children see the value in everyone’s work vs. having the belief that there are inferior jobs/skills/people/lifestyles.

Post # 5
1855 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@jjmomma – I understand what you mean about children absorbing their parent’s views/comments… I will never forget the day that my mother told me I had my aunt’s thighs and that I was going to struggle with them my whole life, but at least I would be built well for childbirth.  I was 11 yrs old.  Yeah.  My mother has no recollection of this comment, and it haunted me for a decade.  Finally, though, I ended up taking her critical views (about herself, mostly) and going the other way with it… no makeup, no exercise, no self-editing, and I ended up letting myself go and ended up in an unhealthy pattern that took a lot of effort and years to break away from.  Through the process, I learned that there is nothing wrong with taking pride in the way you look, so long as you understand your motivation for doing it and use healthy tactics, and I teach my son the same.

Post # 8
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

Media has had a HUGE effect on how we function as individuals, how we see ourselves, and how we are in relationships (especially marriage)

I mean, the mission statement of MTV when they started was…

“To own the youth of America. We will tell them (the youth) what to listen to, what to wear, what to buy”

And that’s exactly what happened… all us young girls then just absorded all of the new trends, the way we saw stars start and end relationships, and even the way music described what was physically acceptable and not.

You mentioned the Cosmo magazines, and I can say after working with girls that struggle with eating disorders and other self image issues… magazines like these have had huge impacts on them… along with how the viewed “love” and what the accepted in relationships with guys.

I know that I don’t want my kids growing up with the same mis-conceptions and Darling Husband and I actively try to make sure that our home enviroment is one that builds up our kids (right now just DS but soon we’ll have more) so that he’s confident in himself in the truth and NOT what society says…

We recently got a book called

“Re-create: Building a Culture in Your Home Stronger than the Culture Deceiving Your Kids” by Ron Luce and hope that we can do just that….

A couple fun facts about how some very well known people are with their own kids…

Steven Spielberg doesn’t have a TV in his house and

Bill Gates’ kids don’t get “free” access to the internet.

^ This just tells me that these guys get it and really strive to build in their kids somehting very different than what our media is telling them.

Post # 9
5762 posts
Bee Keeper

I have to say that my own Mom was my biggest cheerleader, no matter what I wanted to do or was interested in, and she always encouraged me to at least TRY. Her example was one I followed with my own kids, and they turned out quite wonderfully!

I have a lot more to say, but my new refrigerator is being installed right now, and they’re removing some doors. I’ll have to finish my thoughts later.

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