(Closed) How does this letter to SIL sound?

• mile end
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2011

I think everything you say is great. BUT I would still push to say it in person. The problem with letters is that there is no way to convey tone, and if your sister-in-law thinks that you hate her, she might read a really negative tone in your letter. I know that you put the smiley faces in there to convey that you are being friendly, but someone who is trying to read it negatively will interpret them as passive-aggressive. Sometimes with written letters, you can’t win.

With an in-person conversation, you could control the tone. I would advise it.

• mile end
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2011

@Treasure43: Errr… hmm. I think you’re right, I would call or email her and ask her to come out for coffee/dinner/shopping. I might not say “we have to talk” because that has all kinds of negative implications (like how it’s the preface to every bad conversation ever, haha). Just ask her out for a get-together, then bring it up.

The other problem with sending a letter is that it is out of your control if she reacts badly. Whereas if she reacts badly in person, at least you have a chance to explain yourself.

• mile end
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2011

@Treasure43: Good luck!

• MrsSl82be
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: October 2009

If she asks why, just tell her you want to clear the air and get to know her better, away from the rest of the family. Be cheery,and she should realize that you don’t mean anything negative by wanting to meet with her

• bells
• 9 years ago

• Wedding: June 2011

I agree that saying these things in person would be much more effective