(Closed) How do/will you address your in-laws?

posted 9 years ago in Family
  • poll: How do/will you address your in-laws?

    Mom and Dad

    by their first names

    Mr. and Mrs. _____


  • Post # 32
    105 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I call my FIL’s Ms. Firstname and Mr. Firstname.  To me, the title of mom and dad are reserved for MY mom and dad.  I don’t expect my Fiance to call my parents mom and dad. 

    Post # 33
    939 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    i chose “other” because i have yet to call FI’s parents anything.  I avoid it like the plague (for 2 years now) because i have no idea.  FI’s Brother-In-Law calls them mr and mrs.  and i don’t know if that’s just his thing or his parents thing.  FI has no idea either and we just kinda avoid the issue mostly.  FSIL calls her dad by his first name…which is also odd…so I don’t really know how to address these people lol.

    Post # 34
    5667 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I’m thinking first names. I’ve always just called them Mr. Hislastname and Mrs. Hislastname but they prefer first names and once Fiance and I are married I’ll feel more comfortable dropping some of the formality.

    Post # 35
    904 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Right now I just call them by their first names. If they insisted, I would call them mom and dad. 

    Post # 36
    376 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I voted for the first names… and now I am thinking about it… I will… until we have kids.. and then I will call them Grandma and Grandpa hahaha 🙂 


    Post # 37
    378 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @GeorgiaTeacup: I only have one mother and father. I have her in my phone as Deb-in-Law lol but I already call them by their first names so this will continue.

    Post # 38
    13898 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I call them by their first names because they asked me to.  When I called my Future Mother-In-Law Mrs.___, she said that I wasn’t a student in her class (she’s a teacher) and her name wsa ___.  It is a cultural thing — where I grew up, it still is Mr. and Mrs. __…my Fiance still calls my dad Mr. _ after all these years.

    Post # 39
    756 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I call my ILs by their first names (well, Mother-In-Law by her first name and Father-In-Law by a nickname that everyone uses). DH calls my parents by their first names as well, but I think it makes him slightly uncomfortable.

    Mother-In-Law signs cards to us “Love, Mom & Dad/Herfirstname & Hisfirstname” as if to address us both. I don’t think there’s any expectation of me ever calling them Mom & Dad. My mom signs things only “Love, Mom & Dad.” My mom has called my dad’s parents “Mom & Dad” for 40 years, so she might be more apt to expect that from DH, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.

    Post # 40
    3482 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I use my IL’s first names. Calling them “Mr. and Mrs.” would feel like I was a little kid on a playdate again. And I only have one mother and one father, the ones who raised

    My parents told DH he could refer to them by their first names, but he goes the avoidance route and doesn’t call them anything because that’s what he’s most comfortable with.

    Post # 41
    4822 posts
    Honey bee

    I call them by their first names. They have asked me to. I would call them by whatever they asked me to. I would respect their wishes despite how I felt about them.

    My mom would like DH to call her mom, but has never told him directly. He calls her by her first name. I know she is dissapointed. 

    Post # 42
    1629 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    You could go with a nickname for Mom and Dad rather than the actual word. If they are a strong cultural background of some ethnicity or another you could use the word for mother or father in that language. My Future Mother-In-Law calls herself Momster when she writes to me. 

    That being said, my little sister calls our own parents by their first names now. First names are just a good, safe default. Even if they feel a bit weird in your mouth at first, you will grow in to it quickly.

    Post # 43
    3622 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    They want me to call them mom and dad, but I think that’s weird. I want to call them by their first names like Fiance calls my parents. Right now, I call them Mr. and Mrs. It’s so awkward and formal.

    Post # 44
    2747 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Mother-In-Law insists I call her “Mom”.  So I use “Mum” and her first name interchangably.

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