Post # 1
Fiance and I just got engaged. We are looking at October 2013 for the wedding because Future Brother-In-Law is ill and we want him in the wedding. That said, we already know who we want in the bridal party. I’d like to do something fun and cute whe I ask my ladies, so…how early is too early to ask? Two of them are my sisters and one has been my bff since we were 5, so I have o doubts that they will still be around once the date gets here. I have no doubts about the other two girls either.
If we were planning a year out, I’d know what to do but with the extra year in there I’m not quite sure what to do. At the very least, I think it would be good to give them extra time to save for dresses, the shower, etc.
What do you ladies think?
Post # 3
@KatyLovesJoey: I do see the wisdom in waiting to ask (because you never know if there will be fallout with somone over something NWR) but I got engaged in June of 2010 and asked all my gals within 2 weeks. The only drawback is that if someone has to decline later (like my friend who got pregnant and will be to far along to travel), then it’s awkward to ask someone to ‘fill in’ so far after the fact.
I see both sides, but if you KNOW these are your gals, then go ahead and ask about a year or so out 🙂
Post # 4
I asked mine immediately! But make sure that you know they are lifelong friends and people that you completely trust! My girls are the most supportive, loyal, and loving friends I’ve ever had in my life, so there was no question for me! But if you have even the tiniest doubt (go with your gut on that one) then wait a bit before you decide.
Post # 5
I asked my best friend to be my Maid/Matron of Honor a couple of hours after my Fiance popped the question (got engaged hours after bringing in 2011). I didn’t hesitate to ask her because we have been best friends since our freshmen year in high school. I already knew who would be my remaining 3 bridemaids but I wanted to wait until six months into the engagement. I asked my SIL and my good friend from middle school during the summer. I asked my last bridemaid (also another high school friend) last month. I knew they all would say yes and be super excited so time was never an issue. Now that we are finally closing in on a year til the wedding…I can’t wait to go shopping bridemaids dress shopping!!!
Post # 6
When is too early to ask? Before you are engaged. 😛 Aside from that, you should have your girls with you every step of the way, no matter how long that way is.
Post # 7
- Wedding: June 2011 - Sydney, Australia
Be careful – we had an almost two year engagement and I asked my three girls quite early on. One I ended an entire friendship with a year in – and that was a hard, hard thing to deal with. It worked out in the end (I asked my future sister in law) but still… maybe leave it until you start planning a little, to make sure you’ve got the RIGHT people for the job!
Post # 8
I asked a couple days after the I got engaged about a year ago BIG MISTAKE!! I originally asked 5 girls and 5 boys. Now after a year of planning, 3 girls decided they wouldnt do it, so i had to cut 3 boys. So sad :/
I would wait
Post # 9
I’m an October 2013 bride as well! 🙂 My sister and best friend knew before we got engaged that they would be in our wedding party, but I asked the third girl pretty much right when we got engaged (June 2011). I think you can ask as early as you are comfortable asking!
Post # 10
I asked my 3 bridesmaids a year before the wedding was due. Now 3 months till the wedding monetary reasons has made us cut down to one bridesmaid and best man.
If I could have my time again I would definetly wait till 5 months before. Your best friends will be with you all the way whether they are part of the bridal party or not.
Post # 11
I asked my girls within a week of getting engaged and we had a year and a half engagement. My BM’s have been my best friends for 15+ years so I knew they weren’t going anywhere. If you’re confident in your decision then I see no issues with “proposing” right away.
Post # 12
We’re getting married in October 2013 too! We asked everyone back in August, more than 2 years in advance, because they were all family or friends we’ve had since we were little. If you’re sure that those are the people you’re sticking with and nothing is going to change (which sounds likely, if they’re your sisters and your BFF of 20+ years) then I think you can ask as early as you like.
Post # 13
Congratulations on the engagement! I don’t see anything wrong with asking them now, I say go for it!
Post # 14
Congratulations!!! I am looking at getting married in October 2013 as well. I was wondering about this as well!! I already Have people asking who I am going to have… Soo whatching this!
Post # 15
You may as well ask them now, it doesn’t mean you have to tell them to do anything right away.
Post # 16
Since I’ve been on the Hive one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned, is to ask BM closer to the wedding date, for my own tastes that would be about (6-10 months) before the date. People act real funny and sometimes it takes time for their true colors come out. And no one is going to start saving from now. It always sounds like good theory but people have their own internal timelines. Take this time and enjoy your engagement.