(Closed) How far apart do you want your children to be?

posted 8 years ago in Babies
  • poll: How far apart?

    1 year or less

    2 years

    3 years

    4 years or more

    Whenever it feels manageable to have another baby

  • Post # 17
    866 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    We are probably going to have two kids, and it would be ideal for them to be 2 or 3 years apart in age. And if we’re lucky enough to have twins as you did, that will probably be it. My brother is 8 1/2 years younger than me, and I love him very much, but we were never close. I always felt like an only child. I’m not saying that because my kids will be closer in age means they will actually have a close relationship, but I think it’s easier for that to happen when they are closer in age.

    Post # 18
    251 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    My older ones are 2 years apart and it worked out well, even when the second pregnancy was twins. I’m 16 weeks with baby 4 and the plan is start TTC  when this baby is a year old. It took 7 months to get a sticky baby this time so I don’t want to wait. 


    Post # 19
    863 posts
    Busy bee

    I want 2.5 years at the absolute minimum.

    My sister and I were barley 2 years apart and it was just too close. Not to mention that she did everything late in life, so it felt like she would just hit some kind of achievement and then it was my turn, and it honestly felt like it was no big deal because she did it first. I always felt like last place. DH and his brother are three years apart and that seems perfect.

    Post # 20
    68 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I like the idea of 2 years. My sister and i are 3 years apart, and growing up, we NEVER got along. She was always that much older than me, always saying I was too young to hang out with her. And my hubby and his brother are 4 years apart, which I feel is too much…they were never very close, growing up or now. I think 2 years is ideal for closeness, but I guess we’ll see as I haven’t even had my first yet!

    Post # 21
    6397 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    Me and Fiance have different opinions. He wants to have 2 years in between each kid (we want 3,) but I’d like to have 4 years in between the first 2, and then the third 2 years after the second.

    Post # 22
    2973 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    it would be nice to have them 2 years apart, but i will be 32 when i give birth to my first. so DH and i have decided to get pregnant again when our first is 6 months old. then we will see how that goes before deciding to have a third. if we do decide, we will try to get pregnant right away in order to have all of our kids grow up together. our kids will be about 15 months apart. my husband will be 34 when we have our first so we are trying to get them all out of the house at the same time lol

    Post # 23
    2973 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @jasn:  my best friend and her sisters were all 3 years apart from each other. there were 3 of them and to their parents, it seemed like they had 3 only children. each of them had a different circle of friends and their own thing going on. it was hard to put them together to do anything and they fought all the time.

    Post # 24
    9168 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    2-3 years apart. Ideally 2 years, but it will likely be closer to 3 because I want some time off between pregnancies!!!!

    Post # 25
    2057 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Catholic Church

    I’d be ok with 1 year or less, so that’s what I voted. Most of my siblings are 14-18 months apart and we really enjoyed that closeness growing up. DH and his siblings are 2 years apart until the last 2 who are 3 years apart. We’re hopinh for a little closer together than that.

    Post # 26
    1298 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Ideally, 3-4 years. As it is, my daughter will be a minimum of 11 years older than any sibling and probably more like 12 or 13 years older.

    Post # 27
    2007 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @UK Bride:  I want 4 year gap to make it easier for me at home…my hubby wants 2 years because he thinks it “ideal”…I told him hell no…so were caught in a bind right now…

    Post # 28
    166 posts
    Blushing bee

    What a fun thread. I want a set of twins, and then a singleton right after. I want to have all my kids before 30 and I want to start TTC at like 27 (I’m 23 now) so id like them fairly close together.

    Post # 29
    1471 posts
    Bumble bee

    SO and I still haven’t decided if we want just one child or two. If we do have two I think I want to have no less than three and no more than five years between the two. My younger sister and I are just under three years apart, and she was just so annoying to be around. By the time we were a bit older she was big enough to steal all of my clothes. She wasn’t old enough to really bond with, but she WAS old enough for my parents to tell me to take her with me wherever I went. She really bothered me a lot growing up, and I think that has soured our relationship even now that we are older. 

    I am currently working as a nanny, and one family I work for has a seven year old and two year old daughter, so they are about five years apart. Just seeing their dynamic and how well they get along is amazing to me. The older sister can remember the younger sister being born, she LOVES when the two year old comes home from daycare, and she helps play with some of the bigger toys. This has been my experience in most situations where siblings are a little bit farther apart in age. 

    Post # 30
    1114 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I put 3 years… We want 3-4 children, I’m leaning towards 3, and we’re both 3rd out of 3. But I have just under 2 year age gaps, FI’s brothers are 8 and 12 years older than him. But his parents didn’t mean to do that.

    I like being close in age to my siblings, but the idea of having a newborn, toddler, and preschooler at the same time scares me.

    Post # 31
    1626 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    @UK Bride:  We are all 3 years apart and I liked that. The only “problem” was that as we grew up we became too cool for school and stopped liking each other in increments and after high school we slowly got back together. So my sister stopped hanging out with us first, then I broke off and we all disliked each other, then she graduated and became close to my brother again and after I graduated she and I became close again, and now that he’s graduated we’re beginning to be close again.

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