Post # 1
Our wedding is about 11 months out still, and I’m not sure when the right time to make a gift registry is?
Is that something that you do just a few months before the wedding for guests to have time to look thru, or something that should be around before all the pre-wedding fesivativies begin?
We’re palnning on an egagment party in mid-oct, and I’m not sure if 1) people even bring gifts to that 2) if money is more common for that if they do give something, or 3) if we’re suppossed to have a registry started before an engagment party?
Post # 2
mssoontobe : Engagement parties are not gift-giving occassions and if people do bring something it’s usually a check, so no- you don’t need your registry done before then.
I got my registry filled out a couple weeks before my first bridal shower. Definitely have it done when your formal invitations go out. People who can’t make it but want to buy a gift sometimes go looking for it right when they send the decline.
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2015 - Southern Plantation House
I would create the registry 4-6 months out from the wedding date. You definitely want to have it available before any showers, because people will ask for it! Darling Husband & I didn’t have an engagement party (we had a 4 month long engagement, so there wasn’t really time!) but we just went to one a couple weekends ago for our friends. From what it looked like, about 50% of the guests brought a small gift off-registry or cash.
Post # 4
MexiPino : So probabbly create one some time after save the dates go out but before formal invites and the bridal shower?
MrsTeacup : This right there gets at my confusion. I’ve also seen off the registry gifts at engagment parties, but since we’re having an engagment party so early (8 and a half months pre-wedding) due to weather and location constraints, it seems maybe kinda gift grabby to make one that early?
Post # 5
mssoontobe : I’m not super traditional so I may not be the best person to answer this, but I don’t think it would hurt to make it prior to your engagement party as people may ask. I would be sure to do it at least 6 months before the wedding. I’m about to shop for a friends wedding gift and they aren’t getting married until 10/22.
I can’t remember when we started our registry, but as we had a small wedding it probably wasn’t more than 4 months out. It ended up being a waste because everyone gave us money, which we were not expecting.
I know it’s different, but I started my baby registry when I was about 3 months along. I’m about 5 months now, but I haven’t told anyone besides family that’s asked. I’ll probably post it on Facebook in October, only because most of our friends and family are out state.
Post # 6
anytime you want. i had a 7 month engagement but i was constantly changing my registry. when i had downtime at work, i would search through items and add and take away depending what i thought i wanted/needed.
Post # 7
I would create it before your shower invites go out. If you want to start earlier you can keep them “private” so people can’t pull them up. If you do them early, there is also a chance that things you have on there may no longer be available closer to your date so you might have to check in and put in replacements
Post # 8
I’m the first of my friends to get married, so I have alot of questions about this stuff.
We already have a house together, so we honestly don’t need too much of the traditional things (maybe just a nice set of china, some extra linen sets, then the random asortment of tiny items for the kitchen). We would hate to have our guests waste money on things we honestly just don’t need, and would rather people give checks instead if they insist on a gift, as this can be put towards renovations we need to do. Is it rude to say that on our website? Is it better to just keep the registry small and asume people will realize we thus don’t need things? If people end up getting us things we don’t need/ won’t use, is it rude to return the items to the stores?
I really hate the idea of us ending up with lots of items we honestly already have and will never use. Seems like such a waste of money to have them sitting unused in a basement.
Post # 9
We didn’t have an engagement party and we have never been to one, so maybe you know more about the norms in your area than we do. But for us, we made sure our registry was up and running before the shower invitations went out.
Post # 10
I recommend making your registry about fifteen to twenty years before your wedding.
It really isn’t ‘nice’ to put an obvious effort into deciding what presents you would like other people to buy you, and for most modern brides, that’s exactly what making a registry is all about.
In its more functional form, a registry is about knowing, early in your life, that adulthood brings with it the responsibility to practice hospitality and to maintain civilities, and working towards being able to do so in a style that expresses your character while maintaining the standards to which you are reared or, if you are something of a rebel, to which you aspire. Entertaining and running a household both take skills and equipment thatone cannot acquire overnight. So you start building up both gradually, with the result that whether you marry or not, at some point you have everything you need to invite the IODE ladies to afternoon tea, or your grand-niece and her two toddlers to stay as houseguests for a week while she cleans out the bank-account and divorces her no-good abuser husband, or the Syrian family who have moved in across from the groceteria to their first north-american Christmas dinner. The fact that if you DO marry, your friends and family can make recourse to snooping through your registry to inform themselves of your style, and what completer pieces you need to go with your Doulton Old Country Roses china, is then purely happenstance — and happily for you, it means that you don’t have to worry about what they may think about your price-points or your choices because it’s none of their business!
What is their business, is to decide for themselves what they would like to give you, if anything; and if they truly are your nearest and dearest, it is to be hoped that they have some idea of just what sort of gift would make you very happy.
Post # 11
As myself & a few friends have learned- items will be discontinued frequently. Don’t make your registry too early or you could end up with plates & cups from a pattern that is discontinued before the bowls & saucers are bought or something similar
I would have it ready when your bridal shower invites are sent out.
Post # 12
A few people asked me for my registry when I had my engagement party. I did not have one set up so I got some interesting gifts (and also some checks). Some people say set it up as soon as you get engaged because people will ask.
Post # 13
Definitely before your showers, if you have one, since the point of a shower is to receive presents.
We did not set up a registry for our engagement parties (we had two), despite the fact that one of my fiancé’s friends insisted that we needed to register beforehand, and she was not going to give a card or gift unless we registered. True life: she’s a terrible person.
We ended up receiving lots of alcohol, cards, and checks. People did not want to come empty-handed. It was all a pleasant surprise.
Post # 14
Practically, it’s really never “too early” to register. Nice towels and a standing mixer will never get discontinued. So long as youre not shoving your ring in peoples faces and saying “We’re registered at Williams Sonoma too! Hint Hint!” people aren’t horrified that you’re ahead of the game making a registry.
Then again, I’m from a family and region where its expected that a guest is invited to some sort of shower and is expected to bring a houseware gift. Even a well stocked registry will still be picked clean by the week before the shower, let alone the wedding. So I’ve always been grateful to have the ability to buy a present within my budget really early and just have it sit in my closet until I can throw a bow on it and give it to the Bride/Groom.
Post # 15
I did it about a year before