Post # 1
Before Fiance and I started dating I was the biggest cigarette smoking, binge drinking, concert going, speed demon, coffee drinking bad ass mofo you knew. He told me he would not tolerate any of that behavior and if I wanted a relationship I would need to mature. So naturally, I did. I didn’t think about it until last night. I went to dinner with a friend and she offered me a cigarette. I said “what the hell, it’s been YEARS.” I realized how much I missed my old self. I don’t regret how I’ve changed because it’s all been for the better, but for that split second I missed my old life.
Anyone else been changed by their SO?
Post # 3
I changed my Darling Husband well more so I gave my Darling Husband a reason to change.
He really liked me but I would just tell him that I won’t date a smoker (cigarettes and/or marijuana), a man whore, or a man who drinks and drives.
After 6 months of him changing his behaviour (and an STD test) I agreed to go out with him.
Post # 4
I feel Darling Husband has really calmed me down. Although I’d pretty much outgrown my ADD by the time we started dating, I was still kind of high strung and loud. Darling Husband is the total opposite and very calm and quiet. We’ve balanced each other out quiet well and he’s helped me become more mellow.
Post # 5
I have a loud mouth, Im stubborn and pretty temperamental. He has tempered these qualities in me; he is very laidback. I am still as extroverted and exuberant as ever though, lol.
Post # 6
I’m more down to earth, open minded, willing to try new things, a little less materalistic. These changes are a mix of being with my fiance and living in Florida and not NY. Before I met him I would have never entered an Walmart, Dennys, Dairy Queen, or Taco bell. I would have never went to a car race or car show. I had a much bigger attitude before I met him as well. Everything I bought had to be name brand and now I realize getting clothes at Target is ok. I don’t need to carry my coach bag or wear my tiffany jewlery everyday anymore.
Post # 7
I’ve come out of my shell more. I’ve always been painfully shy. Fiance is the complete opposite (he completes me!) I was always the quiet one in the group and if I met new people, they always mistook my shyness for bitchiness. It took me years to finally talk more than a couple sentances to his parents. There are still times when I get shy, when Fiance introduces me to all soooo many of his co-workers at once and I literally want to hide myself behind him. They get surprised by me because they think that because Fiance is outgoing, I should be too. Because of those situations I’ve had to force myself to talk to these people and it’s become easier to talk to people, but I’m still hopeless at finding topics to talk about. Just awful at it lol “Sooooo…..do you like stuff?”
Post # 8
Honestly, I dont know. I am sure there is stuff. The biggest one I suppose is I tolerate sports. He comes from a sports family (he played D1 basketball on scholarship as did 2 of his 3 siblings, his father coached D1 basketball as well as played in Europe. I knew I had to at least tolerate them if we were going to work.
I know my FH has changed a lot in terms of his eating habits. He eats a wider variety of foods, is more conscious of the foods he eats and thinks about his long term health.
But overall since we met once we “found ourselves” we havent changed much. We picked up new sports and interests, but who we are is still pretty much intact.
Post # 9
@lefeymw: Sports was a big thing for us too. And eating as well. He used to be able to sit and eat thousands of calories in a single meal. I taught him that was not okay and now he’s much better.
Post # 10
Im not as anxious. My husband always helps me to calm down and be more logical about things. I used to be depressed and cry for no reason and now that doesnt happen anymore!
Post # 11
Not in any way at all. On our first date, we realized we had similar interests & backgrounds. But we have very different temperaments–I’m high strung to his low key calm.
If anything, I am more myself than I was before since I have a partner who is so encouraging of what I do, professionally.
Post # 12
I’d say I’m more patient and thoughtful (I had and still have sometimes a bad habit of just saying sarcastic things that I don’t MEAN to be hurtful but sometimes can be). I’m also half on my way to being a soccer mom. When I met him I didn’t want kids and I wasn’t sure I wanted a house or to live in Columbus or any of that. I still thought I wanted to live in an apartment in a big city blah blah blah. Now we own a house in Columbus (couldn’t be happier!) and I’m totally open to the idea of kids.
I think I made him grow up a lot too though. Primarily in the money aspect. He was TERRIBLE with finances before we met (ironic being that he’s an accountant) and now he’s great.
Post # 13
After thinking about it, I wonder if age is a factor here. We’re quite a bit older than most of the brides here. I know I’m pretty set in my ways & not likely to do much changing. FH is the more adaptable of the two of us.
I think I’ll ask him tonight if he feels like he’s changed!
Post # 14
I’m more confident. laid back and don’t analyse everything anymore.
Post # 15
@Aubergold: You and your SO sounds alot like me and Darling Husband. He’s made me less stressed out and makes me be less stubbon about things. Darling Husband is SOOOO laid-back which has really helped balance me out.
Post # 16
I’m a lot more sensitive to his feelings and I’ve defintely matured (but I don’t really credit that to Boyfriend or Best Friend as much as I credit it to growing up). He’s opened me up to a lot of things like: scary movies (I still hate them, but I’ll only watch them with him), different types of music and books, just little things like that.
Personality-wise, I’m still me and I would never change that and he wouldn’t change that either.
When I get emotional and hormonal from PMS, I have serious attitude and emotional problems but I’m in the process of controlling myself during those sensitive times (but he is really patient with me, thank God)…humans are a work-in-progress. That’s life!
But I wouldn’t really say that he has changed me…I don’t know. I feel kinda weird about this question. Boyfriend or Best Friend has just introduced me to some new things.