(Closed) How I realized I'm a natural mother

posted 7 years ago in Parenting
Post # 17
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@T-Rex:  Exactly. These types of things fail much more often than they actually work. Who knows, maybe the OP is an exception and they’ll grow old together but only time will tell. It still seems premature to dive right into parenthood after such a short amount of time regardless of how badly one wants to be a mother. 

Post # 18
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@lookingglass:  Eh, I don’t know. I’ve known plenty of people to use the “when you know, you know” pitch to defend jumping into a serious relationship after a short amount of time and sadly, the majority didn’t work out. Some definitely did but others were short lived. There’s a lot to be said for putting in the time and really getting to really know someone, especially when there are a couple young kids involved. The father needs to think about the well being of his children. It’s not the best idea to introduce them to a new “mommy” and play house when the relationship is that new and unpredictable. 

Post # 19
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

This kind of situation really freaks me out as a parent. There’s so much that can change and these are human beings with very real emotions and needs. It always worries me when people introduce new partners into their children’s lives so quickly…

 

Post # 20
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee

@lookingglass:  I know of many people that “knew right away” only to break up later after they’ve actually taken time to think about everything and actually get to know someone.  

Yes it is nice that he wants you involved in his kids lives, but they should not be calling you mommy, because you are not their mommy.  I wonder, how many mommies have these kids had in their lives so far?

Post # 22
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I find this story troubling as well.  You say your life was empty.  You threw yourself into this situation with your BF’s parents and young children to feel fulfilled. Now you have a family.  Your Boyfriend or Best Friend already had a life and a family.  You only went on maybe 6 dates before moving in?  What if he isn’t as thrilled with this relationship as you are? Heartache for many people, especially those kids.  He’s the only one with nothing to lose.  Sorry, but this is not good.

Post # 23
Member
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@KatyElle:  Exactly what I was thinking while reading.

Post # 24
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I agree with PPs, after 3 months you’re pretty much still in the honeymoon stage. Have you really gotten to deeply know all his faults, foibles, problem areas? If you have do you find that they are things you can work around or live with or are they going to constantly annoy and eat away at you?

Also, I wholeheartedly agree with what others have said about the needs and feelings of his children. They may be heartbroken and develop trust issues if this guy doesn’t turn out to be the one you form a lifetime relationship with. 🙁

Post # 25
Member
758 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@green_girlie05:  Have you really gotten to deeply know all his faults, foibles, problem areas?

Good point.

Post # 26
Member
2492 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Been there, done that, and he revealed his true colors about seven months in. Be careful, because if it doesn’t work, it is really hard on everyone… Not just the kids, but you too.

Post # 27
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

It would be nice if the OP would come back to address some of the PP’s concerns.

Post # 28
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Hopefully it was Made-Up Drama.

Post # 30
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Seems like theres been an influx of strange/odd posts lately, doesn’t it?

Post # 31
Member
1882 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Troll?

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