Post # 1
I was just discussing this with two coworkers. One agreed with me that attraction is still important in a marriage; and, the other said by the time you’re married, attraction is the least of your concerns. I agree with the former.
What do you think? Is it still one of the top priorities? Or does it move down the ladder? Or does it stay where it has been when you first started to date?
Post # 3
I guess I don’t understand how one would “lose” attraction to their mate. I’ve been with FH for almost 4 years and he still turns my head the way he did on our first date. He feels the same about me. I would be quite concerned if he was no longer “attracted” to me.
Post # 4
It is important but I wouldn’t say it’s a priority. My husband and I have both agreed that we will always stay healthy and take care of ourselves. But other things are much more important to a marriage.
Post # 5
I’ve been with my SO for 5 years and there are many moments I catch myself staring or thinking WOW. I’d be worried if that changed.
Post # 6
Physical attraction is second on my important list.
Emotional/mental attraction is the most important. If we’re not attracted to each other intellectually, we’re not going to get along anymore.
Post # 7
I still think it’s important. I never have understood why women let themselves go after marriage and stop taking care of themselves. However, if Darling Husband starts to gain weight I would be more worried about his health versus the fact that he looks different. I still work out every day, as does he. I don’t think that’ll ever change.
We’ve been together 3 years and I still find myself looking at him thinking, “Wow, I really am the luckiest woman to have someone who’s both incredibly handsome and is just an all around wonderful man.” If that ever changed, I’d be worried.
Post # 8
I agree that physical attraction isn’t the top priority, but it is most definitely a priority. I just couldn’t be married to someone who I didn’t think was attractive.
And for me, my husband’s personality, and humor, only add to his attractiveness – so I find him more attractive year after year. And his cute face is getting better with age too. 😉
Post # 9
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I think part of being a good partner for life is staying relatively fit and healthy, both to help ensure a long and healthy life together, but also to maintain physical attraction with your spouse.
@s2bmrscook: I’ve been with my guy for 13 years. If one of you gets quite a bit overweight, you better believe that physical attraction can be affected, even if the love and mental/emotion attraction you feel is still the same….
Post # 10
If you still want a sex life, it’s important
Post # 11
@PacificMrs: I agree. I’m torn about the guilt put on the SO who lost the attraction, though. Yes, he/she should love their SO regardless but at the same time, you can’t help lose some of that attraction. Of course, we’re not talking about something that can’t be changed. i.e. You’ve been married 20+ years, you’re both not spring chickens anymore. Can’t expect your SO to look like they did 20 years ago.
Post # 13
Just imagine this: You find out your husband is no longer attracted to you. AS much as you want to say that attraction isn’t important, how would that make you feel?
Attraction is important, and part of that means maintaining a healthy lifestyle physically and mentally, which is good for the individual and the relationship.