(Closed) How important is having similar careers to you??

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 47
Member
1530 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@chicagoworkinggirl:  I’ve never heard of anyone picking (or not picking) someone just because they are in a different career field. To me, that is SO unimportant. You love the PERSON, not their job. Plus, it would suck to have the same types of stories to come home to every day. Its fun hearing about different things people do/that can happen at different places of employment.

This is really dumb.

Post # 48
Member
722 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

SO and i have very different careers and ambitions in our careers but we love those differences in us

Post # 49
Member
1197 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Fiance and I met at work, so we had similar careers (him being more senior). He has since moved on to a different field, and I’m still pursuing mine.  It’s honestly really nice to have him understand all my crazy work talk!

It sounds like your issue is more with differences in lifestyles rather than careers.  It could work out either way – I’m fairly social whereas Fiance is a complete homebody.  I also grew up in the DC area and he’s from a very small town in WestVa.  He was practically raised on a farm. I love that about him!  He has gotten me to be more laid back and outdoorsy.  He kind of completes me in that sense, as corny as that sounds.  Opposites attract for a reason!

Post # 50
Member
98 posts
Worker bee

SO and I are both nurses, but in completely different fields. It’s the best of both worlds. We understand all the medical lingo, are okay with “gross” conversation topics (even over dinner), and have a lot of the same knowledge base and interest in health and medicine. With our completely different fields though, there is a lot about each others work that we don’t know. That’s cool to talk about

thiugh, being a male nurse is a rarity and I won’t lie to say him working with 98% women has annoyed my insecure side on occasion. 

ive dated teachers, engineers, and business owners too. All different fields but our professions had nothing to do with why it didn’t work out

 

i did date one man for years and he worked at a low level job with no college education and no desire for advancement. eventually bothered me bc our lifestyle goals, our ambitions were so different. 

Post # 51
Member
468 posts
Helper bee

My SO has a similar career to me, but is otherwise completely different.  He’s much lower key, and move of a country guy.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  Someone can have a similar career, and still be totally different or incompatible.  The only effect career would have on a decision to date is how much/when/where he works.  I might have reservations about dating someone in the military for example, because I wouldn’t be able to pursue my own career with all the mandatory moves necessary for his and I wouldn’t want to be left alone (with kids!) for months at a time.  

Otherwise, there’s nothing wrong with dating someone who has a different career from you.  In fact, its nice because your less likely to talk about the boring details of work, and (if your competitive like me) there is no comparing your career to your partner’s or vice versa.   

Post # 52
Member
8470 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I say give it a shot.

My husband and I do two entirely different things.  There are moments I’d love for him to go to school to become a teacher like me, but right now, he can’t afford the tuition and I think he’s decided to try and get his own business started.

But I see how you feel.  It’d be nice to be on the same schedule and be able to relate to one another and give each other advice.

But I hardly know any couples that do the same thing.

Post # 53
Member
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Good heavens, I would never even consider having similar careers as a criterion for marriage! I am a biologist and college professor. FH delivers bread for a living. He has been working for the same company for 33 years and makes more money than I do!

Post # 54
Member
1992 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

We have completely different career fields, but the thought that I should find a partner in a similar field, never ever ever crossed my mind.  I never viewed it as important.  Sometimes we talk about his work, sometimes we talk about mine.  I really like the fact that we get to teach each other new things about or respective indurstries. 

Post # 55
Hostess
9671 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

I don’t think it matters as long as there is an emotional connection and enough intellectual common ground to keep you interested in one another. I’m getting my PhD in bioengineering and my Fiance is a UPS driver. He’s college educated but doesn’t like desk jobs and needs to be moving constantly. I get strange looks when colleagues ask me what my Fiance does, I guess they assume he’s uneducated because he works for UPS? Umm, no. At the end of the day you come home to one another – how boring would it be if you spent all day together at work and came home and had nothing to talk about?

Post # 56
Member
3208 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I think that both being professionals makes it easier to relate to each other in terms of dealing with firm hierarchy and general office politics, but lacking that would in no way be a dealbreaker to me as long as we had similar values and goals.

If he was a countryboy, it wouldn’t matter if he was a highly well regarded professional or a blue collar guy, we would want different lifestyles, and that would be the dealbreaker.

 

Post # 57
Member
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

To give you a different perspective on things, maybe it’s good to be different?

My Fiance and I work together at the same place, in the tech industry. And as a consequence, sometimes we talk far too much about work after work. Truthfully, I know that I do the same thing to him, so I have no right to complain… but I get really tired of hearing all the mundane details of this account or that technical bug and all the steps he’s taken to resolve this or that. When one of us has a particularly frustrating day, we can spend upwards of an hour venting about the details once we get home.

Maybe if we didn’t work in such similar jobs, we’d talk a little less about work and more about the other things that make us a great couple.

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