(Closed) How involved are your bridesmaids?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I have one Maid/Matron of Honor and one Bridesmaid or Best Man.  They are SO involved it’s ridiculous.  My wedding is more than a year away at this point–after I booked my venue, I told them that I didn’t want to do any more wedding planning until we reached the 1 year mark.  Well since I halted “their” wedding planning, I got a phone call from my mother last week saying that she recieved a call from my Maid/Matron of Honor running some Bridal Shower plans by her.  My mom asked me if I had secretly moved the wedding up to this May!  I agree with above, I always thought BMs weren’t really that involved–boy was I wrong.  I’m definitely not complaining.  I feel so lucky to have them in this process.  I know they’ll be super helpful when I start the real super-detailed planning.  I’m glad that they’re itching to plan my wedding because I’m not exactly on the same page LOL

 

Post # 4
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My BMs (and our moms) are amazing. We’ve had craft days to do wedding DIY stuff. They’ve gotten together regularly to plan things. They ALL wanted to come dress shopping. And none of them have told me to shut up yet when I go on and on and on about x/y/z. It’s awesome, I know how busy they all are, and I’m very lucky!

Post # 5
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My Bridesmaids were pretty uninvolved (to the point of driving me bonkers) in the early part of my engagement but it seems like the closer the wedding gets (26 days!) thery are kicking it into high gear and being AWESOME. I’ve been blessed to have a super involved mom who is literally there for everything and a really great cousin who is acting as my planner and handling everything else. One thing I’ve learned – you definitely can’t plan an entire wedding without some kind of help!

Post # 6
Member
6824 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I had a Maid/Matron of Honor, a Bridesmaid or Best Man and a Jr Bridesmaid or Best Man.  The most involved was my Maid/Matron of Honor but that was only in dress search. Honestly I had no issues with any of my BM’s being not involved. I had DOC who helped out a lot.  All that mattered was my girls showed up looking awesome in their dresses and stood up for me for my wedding.

I don’t get the brides who go all crazy because their BM’s don’t help them in everything.  They have lives to…

Post # 7
Member
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

My bridesmaids helped plan the shower and bachelorette party. They made gift baskets for the shower, they paid for the bachelorette party.

They really didn’t help me with planning with wedding which I thought was fine. They were extremely helpful with everything else!

Post # 8
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m still a waiting bee and I’m already bouncing ideas off them! I will be doing most things myself I think because I will be moving 1600 miles away from them a few months before the wedding (hurray for LDRs :S ) but they’ve offered to help with DIY’s (I’m a control freak, so we’ll see) Mostly I just want to make sure I don’t get wedding-goggles* and make them wear something fugly.

*I’ve determined that there is such a thing as wedding-goggles, they’re like beer-goggles but instead of making unattractive people look sexay they make brides think the most over-the-top and uncharacterisctic style choices are fabulous. I’ve had to stop myself and say…hmm…if it wasn’t a wedding would I even remotely LIKE that?!?! Yeah, no. SIMPLE for me please, frouffy is not me, I have to keep reminding myself, I don’t want to look back and have it not be me.

Post # 9
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I really just need them to keep doing what they’re doing, being a great sounding board and keeping me calm, lol.

Post # 10
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

So far my BMs are pretty univolved with actual wedding planning. I keep them posted via email and text messaging about every two weeks (I don’t want to annoy them) but that’s about it!

HOWEVER… they are planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party completely on their own.

Post # 11
Member
546 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I have two MOHs (best friend and SIL).  They have been amazing so far.  They both live near me and are always sending ideas and willing to go to any meetings with me.  They already started planning shower and bachelorette.  Even though the wedding is 10 months aways.  Mostly due to 3 out of town girls and wanting to give them a chance to attend functions if they can.  (I told them upfront not to worry about travel I just wanted them at the wedding).  Plus SIL travels for work.  I have a few DIY projects and they are jumping to help me make samples to see if they will in fact work out.  Plus SIL keeps volunteering to help with Save the Dates.  

I was in both of their weddings.  Maid/Matron of Honor for BFF and was the only one in the wedding party to do anything.  And Bridesmaid or Best Man for SIL and her family and friends lived out of town so I helped her out as well.  So I think it is all sort of balancing out.

Post # 12
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Mine haven’t done anything except come to my dress try-on when it came in and went shopping to pick their own dresses the same day.  No bachelorette party or shower is being planned that I know of.  They are not very involved but I’m sure they will be helpful as I get closer to the day (I hope).

Post # 13
Member
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Most of my BM’s came with me dress shopping, but they are all local.  Two of them have offered to help with projects, but I haven’t really started anything yet!!  Mostly, they are living their own lives & doing their own thing.  We hang out regularly without any talk about weddings or anything.  I think they’re planning a bachelorette brunch at a place that has a drag show, which will be awesome!  I’m not supposed to know about that though…Shhhh!  I asked them not to have a bridal shower since we already own our home and showers are for gifts that I don’t really need.  For the most part, we’re just friends hanging out doing things friends do, and we catch up from time to time about the wedding.  We’ll be bridesmaid dress shopping soon, but I’m picking a color & letting them pick their own style since they all have different body types & budgets.  Not going to stress about things if I can help it!

Post # 14
Member
802 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I have 1 Maid/Matron of Honor, one Bridesmaid or Best Man. My Maid/Matron of Honor is involved because she wants to be, the Bridesmaid or Best Man is not very involved, because 1..she is my FI’s sister, and 2. She annoys the shit out of me. 🙂

Post # 15
Member
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

My BMs and 1 Maid/Matron of Honor arent that involved but I have a little over a yr before my wedding. I believe when it starts getting closer to the date they will be more involved. However, my 2nd Maid/Matron of Honor who is also my cousin, which by the way I have 2 NOT on purpose, has been taking over and not in a good way. She has her own agenda in mind it seems sometimes and is not listening to what I want or listening to my budget or anyone else’s. This past wkend we went to try on Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses and there was one that I thought looked okay but wasnt really okay with the price. She had the nerve to say that if the other BMs couldnt afford the dress then maybe they dont need to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. I was really shocked she said that. Also she wanted to change the colors of the dress… NO. Then she wanted to wear a different dress than the other girls… remember that shes not the only Maid/Matron of Honor. Im just hoping I can keep sane while respectfully declining everything she has to say!

Post # 16
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I had 4 bms. My Maid/Matron of Honor and I planned my bachelorette weekend getaway together. And then my Maid/Matron of Honor and 1 of the bms helped me make the programs. The same 2 girls went with me to pick out their dresses. And my Maid/Matron of Honor helped me make our guest book cards (we didn’t do a traditional book). That was already more than I wanted to ask from them. The other 2, 1 lives far away so she wasn’t able to help, the other, well she lives the closest to me actually but whenever I asked her to help or go look at dresses with us she would be “busy”.

The topic ‘How involved are your bridesmaids?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors