Post # 1
Me and Darling Husband are finally starting to try and concieve, we got married in may, and started trying in July. I thought i got lucky within the first month of trying cause my period was a week and a half late, but unfortunatly still negative.
we tried once a week every week in august and still negative, our plan is to try twice a week every week this month….
which leads to my question to anyone who is pregnant or has been, how often did you try in the course of say a month or multiple months were you finally able to conceive?
since started TTC i find the fertility calendars that are constantly out there arent that great of a source from the experience ive had so far. (ive been keeping track of everything through my calendar.. from how long my period starts and ends, to the days we actual have intercourse)
Post # 2
Kslim13 : you need to have more sex. Once a week at the minimum may never even hit during your 5 ish day ovulation window. Twice a week might not even be enough. Most Dr’s will recommend every other day to cover your bases. Read taking charge of your fertility and educate yourself about your body and the process of ovulation and pregnancy.
Fwiw we had near perfect timing every month (sex 3-5 times leading up to ovulation). Pregnancy and miscarriage during month 6. Another 6 months with no pregnancy and moved to the RE. I’m now over two years into this with 6 iuis and another loss and just completed my second ivf retrieval.
Post # 3
Four times a month isn’t going to give you great chances, especially if it’s not when you’re ovulating. I was using OPKs and we has sex everyday in the 4-5 days leading up to my ovulation. I got pregnant on the second month but I think we were lucky with very good timing to have it happen so quickly.
Post # 4
I got pregnant 6 times by having intercourse every day or every other day near my fertile window. The app fertility friend and temping are saviours as so many times my ovulation was earlier or later and it meant I didn’t miss out.
Post # 5
BeverlyGeese : what if it was twice a week meaning mon-fri not necessarily mon-sun. ive tried the ovulation sticks but they got super expensive after a while considering it told me to use one every single day.
Curlycupcake : i could never count on the ovulation calendars that ive seen online cause all of them tended to give me differing weeks on when i was ovulating, which just confused me more.
i had a friend who got pregnant the first month of trying and she told me they had sex two to three times a week every week, which is all im really basing mine off of at this point. I know i cant really base it off someone else, but ovulation calendars and sticks werent to helpful either for me.
Post # 6
- Wedding: October 2015 - Swaneset Bay Resort & Country Club
I got pregnant my first month trying and my first month off of birth control. I did use OPK’s and started them about 9 days into my cycle and got a positive on CD14. We had sex 5 times in my fertile window and I got pregnant the day I ovulated! 18w2d now!
If you don’t want to use OPK’s or temp that’s your prerogative but you’ll need to up the sex to more than once a week!
Post # 7
Kslim13 : I don’t think you are understanding. The frequency doesn’t matter, it is all about timing. You could have sex every other day and that will increase your likeliness of hitting your fertile window, but it’s about having sex at the right time (4-6 days out of your cycle).
I highly suggest you read Taking Charge of Your Fertility to learn more.
Post # 8
Cassidylouise : the OPK thing was so confusing, my period lengths tend to very month by month, sometimes mine last five days and sometimes they only last three to four days… i have very short and light periods after day one. so trying to figure out when to start the test confused the crap out of me.
Post # 9
You are only fertile about 4 days a month. Therefore, it doesn’t matter how many times you have sex each month- it matters ensuring you have sex during your fertile window and before ovulation. Identifying your fertile window can’t really be calculated with just a calendar of period start and end dates. You do not have to use OPKs- you can temp and monitor CM (which is free except for the cost of the thermometer).
We normally have sex 2-3x a week, but that doesn’t have anything to do with trying to get pregnant. We BD at least EOD during my fertile window, tracked by CM and temping. I have loong periods and often delayed ovulation so charting helped immensely in confirming I had still not ovulated and we needed to continue to BD EOD. On our 3rd cycle actually trying I got a BFP, having BD’d on 0-2 and the morning of 0.
Post # 10
It took 8 months the first time, which ended in a miscarriage. Three months th second time, and I’m currently 11w3d.
I agree with all of the previous posters – it’s not about how often you do it, but when you do it. I strongly recommend you read Taking Charge of Your Fertility, get a BBT thermometer, and the Fertility Friend app. I have extremely irregular cycles, anywhere from 28 days to 58 days. What temping did was show me patterns. If my cm started getting sticky, and my temperature was starting to drop, I knew I was about to get into my fertile period, and we would start BD every other day. Within a couple of days I would have EWCM and my temperature would drop further, so we would BD every day. Once I saw a clear temp shift up which signals ovulation, I’d give Darling Husband a break 😊
Both times I got pregnant, we hit -5, -3, -2, -1 and ovulation day. Then we didn’t do it again for a week!
Post # 11
Kslim13 : Darling Husband and I decided to “let nature take its course” to see if we would get pregnant. Due to previous issues I didn’t think it would be easy for us… I conceived about a week after that conversation.
Second time around we weren’t necessarily trying or preventing, we knew we wanted another soon, but hadn’t made the full on decision to “try”. I track my cycle and normally I check my calendar first to make sure we aren’t too close to ovulation (lame, I know), but I didn’t check and apparently we did it on my most fertile day of the month. Hello baby #2!
You should be having sex a few days before you ovulate, when you ovulate and after too, to sort of blanket that entire timeframe as sperm can live for up to 72 hrs.
I highly recommend the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility. I’ve used it for almost a decade because I don’t believe in hormonal birth control and as I’m married don’t use condoms either. I’ve used this method to prevent and get pregnant. It’s really, really great.
Post # 12
Joining the chorus to say that timing is what counts. I temped and tracked my cervical mucous and got my bfp after two cycles trying. Tracking the cervical mucous is what gives you the info in advance of ovulation, and your temperature will confirm that you have ovulated. We only actually had sex twice in the fertile window both cycles, but the time we got ouf bfp we did it on the day before and day of ovulation. I highly recommend getting the fertility friend app (or just using the website) and reading all of the articles on it. Taking Charge of Your Fertility is great too, but if that seems overwhelming then the app still has enough info.
Post # 13
The online calendars you get aren’t helpful because they know nothing about you or your fertility. It’s just a guess based on averages. OPKs and temping are the only way to begin to pinpoint ovulation so you’ll know when to have sex. Of course you can choose just to have lots of sex, but if you’re wanting it to happen sooner and be proactive, you need to try to confirm ovulation. You can get huge packs of opks called wondfo from Amazon really cheap. As a PP said, every other day around the time of ovulation is what you should be aiming for.
Post # 14
I track my temperature, use OPKs (order from Amazon), and chart on fertility friend. We BD eod or sometimes ed during my fertile window (on clomid dr likes it everyday for three days). I have a quick lh surge, once I get my positive I o the next day. We are cycle 11 trying and doing our first iui next cycle.
Post # 15
What calendar are you using? I used Ovia when we actually started trying for a general idea of my fertile window and we took it from there. I know it doesn’t tell you exactly when you ovulated but it gets you a general idea, but I was always pretty regular. I tried OPKs for like a day and decided it was way too much work so we just BD every day during my fertile window. The month I got pregnant was the time we only BD once during my fertile window, right before I ovulated apparently. We tried for 7 months but I’ll be honest and say that we didn’t BD diligently during my fertile window all the time – sometimes it was every day and others it was once or twice during that week. It took us 7 months from the time I stopped taking my birth control.