(Closed) How long did you and SO talk about marriage before getting engaged?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 47
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

We had been together for about 4 months when he randomly told me one night, “I’m going to marry you one day!”  Totally caught me off guard, because he was extremely reserved when we first got together.  We mentioned it off and on for quite a while until he proposed 9 months after first bringing it up..by this point we’d been together for a little over a year.  Our engagement has been a long one, for several different reasons, but we are finally taking the big leap in April and we could not be more excited!

The best advice I can give is to enjoy this inbetween time while you’re dating one another…it’s such a short time compared to the forever that comes after getting engaged/married.  I found that when I started getting myself hyped up about getting engaged once it had been brought to the table, I was missing out on being in the moment when we were together.  When he would do something really sweet or start saying super lovey dovey things to me I would start thinking that he was about to propose and totally missed out on being present in that moment…if that makes sense 🙂 

Post # 48
Member
2334 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

We both sort of knew this was it for us.  We would casually discuss “someday” or “in the future” as a way of talking about being married, but the marriage discussions didn’t start until he told me he wanted to look at rings.  No planning was done until after he proposed.

Post # 49
Member
6117 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@AeroLove:  We dated for two years (with plenty of “forever talk” prior) before we made an actual plan to get engaged in the following year.  I wanted to be done with my coursework, and I watned to be engaged before we lived together.  We talked about the ages we’d like to be married by, how long we’d like to be engaged for, all that jazz.

So for a whole year we knew that we were getting engaged in the “spring of 2011.”  I did stay in my own house until he proposed, but all the while we were cleaning up is closet to accomodate my clothes, getting rid of old furniture to allow room for my furniture, I went along to pick out faucets since it was going to be my house too, as H put it.  We were planning for it!  But I moved nothing until I was engaged!

The actual proposal was still a surprise believe it or not!

Post # 50
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

If I remember correctly, FH and I first discussed marriage maybe 2 months into the relationship.  Just saying we wanted to marry each other and spend forever together.  We didn’t really discuss discuss until about a year ago (after being together for 2.5 years).  He proposed about 11 months later (Dec. 25).

Post # 51
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

he first brought up marriage in December 2011. We were engaged by August 2012 🙂

Post # 53
Member
1534 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

My SO and I started dating a year ago yesterday, but weren’t technically ‘official’ until June (even though we didn’t see anyone else during that time, he just didn’t ask me to be his girlfriend until June). Since about August of so we had been talking about marriage and spending the rest of our lives together. Then, we started looking at houses to buy together and put an offer on a house in December (still waiting on it, its a Short-Sale, so it takes way longer than a regular sale). 

In January he asked me what kind of rings I would like and he mentions marriage way more than me! It excites me so much. I try not to talk about it too much so I don’t pressure him, but he always brings it up! The other day, out of no where, he was like “so I was thinking it’d be nice for us to get married on a lake.” And another time, he was just laying down on my bed reading and puts it down and all of a sudden he just goes “so, how many people were you thinking you’d want at the wedding? I want a small wedding.” and we got to talking about that. (I want a small wedding too, good thing! BUT. His small wedding and my small wedding are totally different. I think small is 30, he thinks small is 80. haha).

I’m almost 24 and he is 29.

Post # 54
Member
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Started talking around the 11 month/year mark and by month 16 we were engaged. But we were in our 30s, a bit older, honest with each other. I’m not completely surprised there was such a quick turnaround.

Post # 55
Member
495 posts
Helper bee

We started talking about it when we moved in together a couple of weeks shy of a year. I mentioned that I wouldn’t be moving in with him if I didn’t think we’d get married some day. He said the same.

Six months later, we were telling people we were engaged. We’ll be married two years and two weeks after we first met.

Post # 56
Member
1718 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We talked about marriage 8-9 mos. into our relationship.  We talked about babies, finances and where we see ourselves.  It wasn’t to put a date on things because we were still fairly new in the relationship.  1.5 years in, Darling Husband proposed and we got married 6 mos. later. 

Post # 57
Member
494 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@AeroLove:  We’ve been dating for over 3 years and after about 5 months together we decided we wanted to move in together and I think it was shortly after that my Fiance brought it up, that he’d like to marry me some day. We were still in school at the time so we waiting a long 2 years, finally moved in together and then 5 months later he proposed!

Post # 58
Member
6117 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We dated 2 years before we made plans to get engaged the following year.  Plenty of forever talk prior to the engagement/wedding talk though.

Post # 59
Member
237 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@AeroLove:  Gosh, we decided we wanted to be together a month into our relationship! But we made it a goal that we would get through two deployment together, and then seriously considering marriage…though we did/do talk about it all the time! He ended up proposing after we’d been together a little over a year (and after two deployments ;))

Post # 60
Member
9089 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

He told me day three that we were dating that I was going to be his wife. We talked seriously about it for like a month.

Post # 61
Member
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

We started talking about it after 3 months of dating, and knowing each other for one month before we started dating. The only reason why we aren’t married yet is because our financial situation isn’t the best, and we are confident it will be manageable next year, not to mention his deployment is starting next month. We’ve been engaged for a few weeks, nearly one year after we met!

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