I’ve just looked at your previous posts OP, and I feel cross for and on your behalf at all his messing about and stalling etc, all of which is damaging your self esteem (never terribly robust to strart with I suspect? )
The situation is now that you feel not only humiilated at his evident reluctance – I would too, I’d absolutely hate that feeling – but also hesitant to do or say anything in case you are accused of the old Nagging/Pushing/Harassing/Cornering number . You readily agree that this is your shared future , as many pps have said and I think you do believe it is, but you still can’t act as if it is .
Given the distance thing, and the fact that every meeting now is being tainted, at least for you, by the non-event of a proposal and all the accompanying pain , write it.
Send him a detailed email laying out your concerns . Tell him you are humiliated and saddened by his apparent reluctance; that you have been made to feel discussions of your shared future are being labelled as you nagging etc; that you feel sidelined in decisions concerning your own life . Tell him you are not begging or cajoling when you say you don’t particularly want a big wedding or an expensive ring. Tell him that what you do want is to be engaged now, and then, in not too long a time, married to him. Tell him if he doesn’t want that, you need to know now.
Do not apologise or sell yourself short in any way , or indicate that a ring, any ring , will shut you up for a few years.
The best result will be he sees the ‘error of his ways and you are married in a year . It is also possible he will buy a ring and all mention of when marriage will actually happen is shut down for years, Or , he may say that he is trerribly sorry, but he doesn’t want to marry you after all .
I hope for the first option, I hope you don’t allow the second ,and I hope the last one isn’t true Good luck OP.