(Closed) How long from ring browsing to proposal?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
2633 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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Ms.PatientBee:  LOL yeah it was tough but in the long run I wouldn’t have changed anything looking back now. We did everything the right way (bought the house, lived together for a few years, saved a lot of money to pay for the wedding and honeymoon outright) etc… AND he ended up letting me have my ring made custom!

In the end it all works out. Try to enjoy your life together instead of allowing things to get out of control.

Post # 17
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

My engagement story (it’s long but might be helpful for waiting girls out there!):

I moved in with my now Fiance in May and before I moved in, I made this abundantly clear to him: If you want me to move in with you, you must be sure that you want to marry me. I am not moving in with a boyfriend that is unsure whether marriage is in our future.

He said that he was certain he wanted to marry me one day, so I moved in.

In mid July, he needed to buy a new suit for work. I suggested (quite purposefully) to go to a suit shop that just happened to be down the street from Tiffany’s. While we were walking I said, “Oh, look! There’s Tiffany’s, I just LOVE Tiffany’s. Let’s go in there and look for the yellow diamond ring you’re going to buy me one day, hehe.” He laughed and pretended like he didn’t want to go, but when we got there, he was totally paying attention. But he’s a finance guy so there was no way in hell he was going to pay Tiffany’s marked up prices just for the name. I knew I’d have to find what I wanted on my own (he HATES shopping), but at a bargain.

I asked him flat out, “How much do you think a guy should pay for an engagement ring? Like, how much do you think YOU’D be willing to pay?” He told me and for the following weeks after that, I started researching diamonds and diamond vendors to see if I could find a loose yellow diamond with the specs of the Tiffany’s ring I liked within the budget he unknowingly gave me. I came across James Allen. I asked my now Fiance: “If I find the perfect yellow diamond online, would you buy it?” He said, “We’ll cross that bridge if you find one.” I took that as a yes and a couple weeks after that, I found my perfect yellow diamond. After two days of “thinking about it,” he purchased it. But we didn’t consider ourselves engaged because we only had a loose diamond; no ring, no proposal.

I found a jeweler, designed my own setting, and Fiance paid for and then officially proposed with the ring I designed in late October. I have my fiance and perfect ring now. SOOOO long story short,  started shopping in mid July and proposal by late October (technically though, we started shopping in mid July and by mid August we were unofficially engaged since he had already purchased my center stone…so it took only like a month). But I’m super direct; I didn’t mince words or play games, and I made sure he was ready, so I think that’s why it happened so quickly!

Note: Of course I would have LOVED to have been surprised, but my guy is just not the super romantic, thoughtful type that would have scoured over diamond websites and such; he absolutely hates shopping and “girly stuff.” Had I sat around and waited for him, he would have gotten me a lame ring two years from now and paid way too much for it. This way worked great for us with our unique relationship dynamic, but I know is certainly not the right process for every couple!

Post # 18
Member
8515 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Hmm, from serious looking (i.e., actually going into the store and trying on) to the proposal was about 2 months. Fiance wanted to propose sooner but had issues booking a date at the winery he wanted to propose at.

But we had on and off talked about types of rings for several years before then. We just knew it didn’t make sense to take any serious ring action at those times because we were waiting until Fiance got his PhD to get engaged.

Post # 19
Member
215 posts
Helper bee

I’d prefer not to ring shop. Maybe look, but not pick it out. I like being surprised.

Post # 20
Member
3879 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Proposal came first, then ring was purchased a few months later after I found what I liked.

Post # 21
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

We talked about getting mutually engaged, picked out rings in store together, and officially proposed all in a matter of 2 weeks when he had the ring on hand! But I consider myself engaged even before he proposed with the actual ring sooo… 

Post # 22
Member
1703 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

We only went shopping one time and then it was 2 weeks until he proposed (had to wait for the ring to get in)

Post # 23
Member
27 posts
Newbee

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Ms.PatientBee:  he brought it up lightly this past July, and I think August, right after our one year anniversary, we went to look at stuff together a few times. Then in mid October we went back to peg down size/setting/cut. He was pretty concerned I get a ring I absolutely love, so I guess I was pretty involved. We both loved round brilliant cut, and pretty much always had that as the plan. Then I picked a size range that we both agreed on. Finally i pointed out 3 settings I loved and he got to chose which one. So he picked the diamond and the setting based on what we looked at. He proposed this November, so I guess total, 3-4 months of “waiting” for me. And he STILL managed to surprise me! I was on my toes the whole time thinking “this will be it!” But he managed to find the perfect time when I had my guard down ๐Ÿ˜›

Post # 24
Member
1446 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I caught him looking at rings in May, and found out he bought a ring a week ago (mid November). I haven’t been involved at all, I am just a little bit of a snoop. Haven’t been proposed to yet, so we’ll see how long this last part takes! Haha ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 25
Bee
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: Backyard Forest

 

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Ms.PatientBee:  One year! I soooo did not expect that! It was a long year ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 26
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

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Ms.PatientBee:  I’d been researching rings for months because we started talking about getting engaged when we’d been together about 2 years.  We agreed in November 2014 that we would use the tax return to get my ring set and get engaged after that.  He didn’t want to propose without a ring.  So we bought the ring Feb 6, his grandmother died 2 days later, and he wanted to wait awhile after that so the engagement wouldn’t be associated with his grandmother’s death, then he proposed March 6.  So technically I was waiting a month, but if you include the talks about it, more like 7 or 8 months.

Post # 27
Member
443 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016 - Long Island, NY

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Ms.PatientBee:  For us… it was 6 weeks from ring shopping together until he proposed ๐Ÿ™‚ I am very thankful it wasn’t too long, even though at the time, it really felt like a long time!

He asked me over the summer to send him some things I liked, so I did. But I also asked him if he would mind if we went looking at stores together so I could try things on instead of just winging it. He loved that idea, so we looked online together sporadically and finally went shopping in the middle of November. He proposed on Christmas Eve ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 28
Member
203 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

He asked me to put pictures together if what I like in October, but I found this to be pretty stressful and ended up telling him I wanted him to pick out the ring totally by himself. I’m not sure exactly the dates/process of his research but he was looking for a stone for a few months, I think the ring started being made in March and he proposed in May two days after the ring was finished. I tried not be be involved at all but he kept talking about it! it was still a surprise when/how it happened even though I clearly knew it was going to. We were together 1 year and 4 months the day we got engaged.

so… About 5-6 months.

Post # 29
Member
27 posts
Newbee

I told him he better not bait and switch me. The next gift better be a ring on my finger and not a goddamn sweater. 4 months was how long it took to get my custom ring designed, cast, and made.

Post # 30
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Las Palmas

We are at 4 months… and counting. Ring ‘research’ became a problem for me, ha ha. I was completely obsessed with creeping beautiful rings online โ˜บ๏ธ He took me ring shopping in hopes of curbing my obsession (it worked, for the most part). I was super specific as to what I wanted, so was really involved in the ring design. After that I was cut out of the process completely. It’s kind of fun not knowing how the ring turned out or when it will happen.

I hope it happens for you soon!

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