(Closed) How Long is Too Long of a Wait Between the Ceremony and Reception?

posted 8 years ago in Reception
  • poll: What to do?!

    Arrange for the reception site to accommodate early guests

    Nothing. They can find something to do to kill the time.

    I like polls! :D

  • Post # 62
    Member
    493 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @silkspectre94:  If I was your guest, I would probably skip the ceremony and go to the reception. I really would not want to wait around in town for approx 4 hours.

    Maybe have some games set up?

    Post # 63
    Member
    670 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    not sure why people are complaining about the big gap, I think its rude because there is a gap to not go to both. Like seriously if you are an adult you can find something to occupy your time, and out of towners usually visit with family or socialize or go back to the hotel to have a snack. That’s how it is here!

    Post # 64
    Member
    2999 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    View original reply
    @silkspectre94:  You’re completely right with your math. Its only a 2.5 hour gap. It just looks bad on paper. You could ask the pastor/rev/priest (whatever it is for you, I might have missed it lol) if you can provide refreshments in the lobby for your guests to have before they leave. We are thinking of doing this since so many people lingered after the ceremony for FI’s brother and my brother’s weddings. You get to start pictures and they have a few minutes of entertainment and a little snack.

    Post # 67
    Member
    11735 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    they’re adults they can figure out something to do.  While I’m not a fan of gaps if I’m not staying at a hotel I can go to, but am still too far away to go home, usually we just go to a bar and get an appetizer and some drinks and hang out. It’s really not a big deal.

    In this case, given that your reception is at a hotel, I’d probably head over to the hotel bar to hang out for a few hours.

    Just to add – your gap isn’t that bad.  If your ceremony is done at 2 and reception starts at 5, that leaves 2.5 hours with travel time, not to mention people tend to hang around mingling after the wedding, so that’s another 30 minutes or so there.  2 hours is not a big deal (and I’m not a fan of gap weddings at all! But understand they’re typical for church weddings.)

    I’m shocked by how many people are calling gaps rude to your guest, as well as posting they’d skip your ceremony due to the gap – that’s just rude! 

    Post # 70
    Member
    6255 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    View original reply
    @silkspectre94:  If it’s that way because it HAS to be that way, that’s different. I’d just make sure you let your guests know that due to the church restrictions, there will be a gap and to bring comfy shoes to explore the area with should they choose to do so.

    That way, no one will think it’s just negligent planning or rudeness on your part. You don’t mention what sort of church it is, but if it’s typical for the weddings at those churches to have a gap like that, most people who know you well enough to know that your faith is _____ may be expecting it anyway, but a heads up is always nice.

    Post # 71
    Member
    1060 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    View original reply
    @silkspectre94:  Don’t worry about it. Gaps are a little more common here. Those who are local go home / go to a friends house. Those from out of town go to the mall or a pub or back to their hotel. It’s not that big of a deal.

    Spending one day celebrating the marriage of people you love is not too much to ask in my opinion. If it’s too much of an inconvenience to some people that’s their perogative and probably are sitting at the acquaintance/obligatory invite table at the back anyways.

    Post # 72
    Member
    493 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Oh okay, that’s not nearly as bad. I’m sorry, I was just assuming because of the poll, and the questions you asked, that you were looking for an honest opinion to prepare you for how some of the guests may react. Also, in my region when people have gaps that big it’s usually because they are planning a small ceremony and big reception so people attending one or the other is the norm.

     

    But I agree with the other commentors that it shouldn’t be a big problem as long as it’s made clear on the invites. I promise a few people are totally going to space and not realize the gap. I’ve been to atleast 3 weddings in which this has happened, but you have plenty of time to prepare too!

    Post # 73
    Member
    2775 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    Long gaps are a PITA for guests (because who wants to sit around their house or hotel room or go out exploring the town for hours while all dressed up for a wedding?), but they are also pretty standard for catholic weddings.

    It would be considerate to have something planned for guests to pass the time.  Is there some climate-controlled, convenient location with plenty of seating (the church hall, a family member’s house, a hospitality suite at the hotel where your Out of Town guests are staying…) where you could have light snacks and drinks set up?  That would give people a location and opportunity to spend extra time together (at no cost to them) and if some people would rather meet up at a bar or go to the mall or otherwise do their own thing they are free to do so.

    Post # 74
    Member
    1007 posts
    Bumble bee

    If I were invited to a wedding with a gap longer than 2 hours between the ceremony and the reception, I would most likely just go to the ceremony, and skip the reception (unless of course the wedding was for a very close friend or family member).

    ETA: just to clarify – I would let you know in advance that I would not be attending the reception, as you definitely shouldn’t be paying for meals for people who aren’t there.  I do think it would be rude for a guest to RSVP ‘yes’ to both the ceremony and reception, but then only show up for one of them.

    Post # 75
    Member
    1093 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    We’re having a gap as well! For a couple diff reasons. 

    1. There are 9 babies between 6months and 2 years that will be there and the gap allows for naps, or feeding, rest etc.

    2. Also, since we’re doing photo’s after the ceremony (i’m not a first look gal), this way the guests can go home and relx for a bit before going out for dinner, without waiting around for us to finish pictures.

    3.  The ceremony is aabout 30 mins out of town. But the reception is in town.  So this way, people can drop their cars off before coming to the reception and not worry about driving home. 

    But this works for us specifically for a couple reasons. There are no out of town guests at all. Everyone is either young with kids, or older and would like a mid day break. 

    The last few weddings I went to had a gap and I really liked going home and chilling for a few hours. Getting to relax asnd freshen up allowed me to have more fun at the reception. On the other hand, i went to one with a 3 hour gap where the ceremony and reception were the same location, so it wasn’ enough time to go home but it was hella boring just waiting around…

    At the end of the day, you just gotta do what works best with you! To each their own!

    Post # 76
    Member
    1876 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @silkspectre94:  Can you do the 1.5 hours option by moving the ceremony up?  That would be great, and no one should complain about that. 

    The topic ‘How Long is Too Long of a Wait Between the Ceremony and Reception?’ is closed to new replies.

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