Post # 1
Hello Bees! I was wondering… How long are you planning on waiting after the wedding to have kids. I am getting married in July this year and my fiance wants to start trying right after that. We are both 27 and have been livig together for 2 yrs. He is so ready to be a dad, he even bought a SUV to be ready, lol. It’s cute, however, I have always planned on waiting a year or so after the wedding to get pregnant. Just to enjoy being married. What do you all think? is it better to wait to go for it? Most people tell me to wait, what are the advantages, disadvantages? thanks for your opinions!
Post # 3
My Fiance and I are waiting roughly 2-3 years after we get married. Because once you have kids theres no going back for another 18 years lol. Plus we want to be emotionally/financially prepared. TBH I dont really see a disadvantage to waiting. If we get pregnant right away it wont be the end of the world, but I think being able to enjoy eachother and start saving up for things would be a great advantage.
Oh and I’m 25 and my Fiance is 27.
Post # 4
Yeah, I wanna know this too. We’ve been living together for 5 years already. We talk about kids all the time, but don’t feel we’re quite in the right spot financially. He’s 28, I’m 25… both for only another 3 months. I know I’m still young, but tick tock tick tock.
Post # 5
We got married in September 2011… We were 21 and 23… We’re now 22 and 24…. Planning to wait to start TTC until our two year anniversary, but we’re also waiting for our debt to be paid off…we’ve paid off 7k since we’ve been married!
Post # 6
You could always just NNTC (i think i did that abbreviation right!) and see what happens! lol I mean its a very personal decision and EVERYONE has different opinions about it. You just really need to think about what is best for you and your Fiance. I’m probably just going to see what happens after I get married and not stress about whether or not I’m “trying” to get pregnant
Edit: its totally NTNT : not trying not to
Post # 7
I would like to TTC right after we get married in August. Fiance doesn’t think he is ready for that, so I’m sure we will wait probably about a year after getting married. We will be 26 and 29 when we get married.
Post # 8
We decided to wait at least 3 years. We were 27 and 30 when we got married and had been together almost 4 years at that time. We’re really enjoying being married and are really in no rush to have kids. If it’s wasn’t for the biological clock thing and the fact that we want more than one child spaced at least 4 years apart, I think we would wait much longer.
My mom has always pushed me to have kids ASAP. I was born almost exactly 9 months after my parents wedding. She liked being a young mom and says that the smaller the age difference between parents and children the better they are able to relate to each other. That may or may not be true. I just feel like once you have kids, they’re forever, you can never go back. So why not enjoy your last few years as just you two and focus on you as a couple.
Post # 9
This was me a few months ago! Deciding when to TTC is not as easy as some people think – or as easy for some as for others. We all have our different reasons and ideas.
For us, we were pretty ready to TTC right after the wedding. We had even NTNT for a few months leading up to it! But about 4 days after the wedding we both had a major heart-to-heart and decided that neither of us were 100% ready to go for it. We decided that our other factors at play (jobs, money, etc) were more important for the next few years.
As one of my friends who is a recent mother put it, “Once you have them, you have them. That’s it. They are great! But it isn’t about you as a couple anymore, not like it was.” That was really reaffirming to me to hear.
Oh, ETA: We’ve decided to wait a few years, around 3, before TTC “for real.” If we have a happy surprise before that – YAY! But for now, we’re just going to enjoy being married. And we’ve been living together for 3 years and together for 4.
Post # 10
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
I think it really depends on you. We would be trying right now if it weren’t for the fact that I’ll have a gap in my health insurance between finishing my PhD and starting a job. We got married 2.5 weeks ago and are 28 (me) and 32 (him).
One of my best friends was pregnant within a few months and they couldn’t be happier, but all my other married friends are still waiting or just started trying (as uch as 5 years later).
Post # 11
We plan to wait 1-2 years after marriage to have kids.
I really want some alone time as a married couple before kids but I will be 29 by the time we get married, so tick tock.
My only saving grace is that my mom got pregnant with me at 38 without TTC so I hope that is hereditery.
Post # 12
We plan to wait at least 5 years after being married before we have kids. We want to enjoy being newlyweds, travel more and purchase our first home before we have little ones. I’m 23 & my Fiance is 26.
Post # 13
@Sandrawchs: We are planning to have at least a year before having kids.
Post # 14
For us, I think we’ll wait to TTC until a year after being married. We’ve lived in separate cities for the past 3.5 years, it’ll be nice to enjoy some time together! We both really want kids. I’m 28, he’ll be 26 next month. I feel like my clock is starting to tick a little, but I know that I have some time.
Post # 15
Well we was going to start early this year (as in right now) & December 2011 made us 1 year of marriage & 5 years in total. But we decided to wait. We want to wait until we alteast own our home (hopefully by bext year!) BUT we still want to wait longer. If someone said give a time frame I would probably say between 3-5 years. (WOW) That seems so long but we are young & want to have LOTS of alone time together/travel/experience life! 🙂 I will be 21 this year & my husband will be 23.
So if we stick with 3-5 years (ATLEAST 3 years for sure) we will be married between 5-7 years. Because I am not counting this year. I mean 3-5 years from the end of this year & by the end of this year will make two years of marriage for us. Sorry for being confusing! lol
Post # 16
I’m kind of selfish. I want to have a established married life, and do all the things I want before having kids. I think that’ll be like 6 years from now lol. I’ll be 28 by then. But my mother had me (only child) at 29 and it was hard for her so I think I might have to plan my baby making sooner!