Post # 1
Hi everybody, I’m getting married in August to a fabulous man. We are 27 (me) and 31 (him), we own a beautiful 4 bedroom home, have decent newish cars that are paid off, are both done w college/grad school and have good jobs in our chosen careers. He has no student loan debt and I have just a bit (a small payment each month, honestly not sure of the total balance) and we have zero credit card debt between us. We also do not expect to incur any debt from the wedding. My parents gifted us enough money to pay for our entire reception and between money that we had saved plus money from his parents we will pay for the whole thing in cash and will still be left with a decent balance in our savings account. He makes double what I make and we have already discussed and decided that when we do have children I will be a Stay-At-Home Mom. With all of that said I have a bad case of baby fever. I want a baby SO bad. On the one hand I feel like i’ve accomplished what I want to as far as school, job, finances so why not have a baby as soon as we’re married? On the other hand I feel like maybe we should “enjoy being married” first. At the same time, we live together and we have lived together for awhile so what will really be different after the wedding? My Fiance loves children and is always saying he can’t wait until we have little ones of our own. I’ve been on BC since high school (bad cramps so I went on it young). I’m so nervous that I won’t even we able to get pregnant since I’ve been on the pill for 10-12 years. So I want to start trying as soon as we get back from the honeymoon. I guess I’m just looking for advice and maybe experience from others. Do you think we should wait or jump in right away? Who knows how long it will take to get pregnant so maybe I should start right away? Thanks 🙂
Post # 3
It’s such a personal decision to decide when to TTC. Darling Husband and I have wanted a family for a very long time and we decided to throw caution to the wind on our honeymoon. AF ended up coming, and the disappointment we felt showed us how much we really wanted to have our family now. I got my BFP in December and while it’s nervewracking, it’s also very exciting.
The idea of having time as newlyweds is also very individual. My Darling Husband and I bought our home and lived together for nearly 3 years before we got married, so there really wasn’t any adjustment period for us. If you want to travel and whatnot, now would be the best time for you (in my opinion) before bringing a baby into the world – although many travel with their little ones without a problem!
There are pros and cons to each side – you and your sweetie need to decide what’s best for you! Good luck!
Post # 4
Darling Husband said we wanted to wait a year after we got married but then we had a scare like 6 months in and realized after AF came how disappointed we were. So we decided to start trying in the next couple of months and here we are!
Post # 5
Are there certain things that you wanted to do/experience first that are making you hesitant? It sounds like you’re both ready and honestly- there’s no one way to “enjoy being married first.” Even if you got pregnant on your honeymoon you’d still have 9 months until the baby actually arrived! If y’all are both ready, go for it!
Post # 6
Sure, if you’re ready and everything is in place, I say why wait. Are you living together now? If you are, imo, you’re already living the “married life” without the official doc and nothing will really change. We would have started right away, but wanted to do a few more big vacations first pre-baby.
Post # 7
Thanks for all the feedback! We are living together now and by the time we are married we would have been living together for a year and a half. We are going on our dream vacation for our honeymoon so really there isn’t anything we “need” to do before we have a baby. There won’t be a real adjustment period after the wedding since we already have a home together. I’m not sure what my body will do once I go off BC so I think I will wait to go off of it until after the wedding and honeymoon (I don’t want AF to show up during those events!) but would love to start trying in September. Thanks again for everyones insight 🙂
Post # 8
While everyone is different and it’s a truly personal situation, if i was in your shoes I would probably want to wait a few months, at least. For us, we had lived together for about a year and half when we got married and there was still an adjustment period after the wedding. Not bad, but it was different and it was nice to deal with any disagreements or whatever on our own terms. Plus, it was FUN getting settled in, using our gifts from the wedding in the kitchen, going out and being excited to say husband, you know? Since you are young and there is no pressing need to decide right away, I would say why not just wait a couple of months?
But, that’s only my opinion. If you are just too excited, go for it 🙂
Post # 9
i agree that it is a very personal decision, but on the other hand, i’ve read that it’s best to have children as early as your situation allows, and if you feel ready, why wait or wait for what?