(Closed) How many bridesmaids did you/will you have?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 46
Member
479 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I had 2 bridesmaids and a junior bridesmaid. My sister’s and my niece. It really is up to you, all weddings are different.

Post # 47
Member
691 posts
Busy bee

I spent MONTHS (July – Nov) trying to decide who my bridesmaids would be, so that I wouldn’t upset anyone. I decided on only having family in the bridal party.   BIG MISTAKE!

I’m an only child,  but grew up to consider my first cousins my siblings.  Im 32, four of my cousins are married with 2 children,  one just had her third.  I still wanted them in my bridal party because they are the closest to me.  

I bought all the proposals etc,  but had not yet spoken about anything except one cousin,  who would be my maid of honor. 

In order to not hurt anyone’s feelings I was going to have 8 bridesmaids! I didn’t want that many.  Our wedding will be around 150 -175 people and Im putting their kids in the wedding,  I didn’t want everyone in the bridal party. 

Thanksgiving week I received texts from 3 cousins: 

Cousin #1: she apparently getting engaged soon and will be getting married quick, before me. Uhhh. .. flash forward she’s still not engaged and rumors are they broke up.  

Cousin #2: I’ll be helping cousin #1 (her sister) with planning and is only one person. Not sure who you’re picking but don’t consider me I’m only one person.  Then wished me stressfree and peaceful planning…. at 9pm on a Sunday. I responded the next day to her essay of a text saying “ok”. 

Cousin #3: I’m old with kids put the younger ones in.  

Point is F*** pleasing others.  My cousins ruined my other cousins bachlorette and morning of,  but I gave them the benefit of the doubt. 

Im SO THANKFUL this happened now. My bridesmaids will now be the people that I truly want in my party,  not just or of obligation. 

My mom later asked me if I will have an adults only reception. I said,  yes. She’s like “what about the kids?” I said new mantra “I don’t give a shit” 

I’m going to do what I want,  what’s best for us,  the others can figure it out.  

I suggest you do the same. 

I will now have 4 or 5 

Cousin (MOH), Future Sister-In-Law, 2 best friends

Post # 48
Member
644 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

I am planning on one. My Maid/Matron of Honor, who is my best friend since we were in kindergarten. 

It is about who you want by your side during this moment. And for me, my Maid/Matron of Honor has been there for me through it all, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Post # 49
Member
289 posts
Helper bee

I had 8 and it was awesome! I had my sister, future sister-in-law, and 6 friends. It does make it harder to cover bridesmaid expenses though, since anything multiplied by 8 adds up fast. I think it would depend on the age of your sister-in-laws and if it would be meaningful to them. Maybe ask you fiance if he can predict how his sisters would feel about it. I included my sister-in-law and was happy to, because she is the same age as my sister and I feel like I just added a wonderful new sister to my family! 

Post # 50
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

I have 3 bridesmaids… my 2 sisters and my best friend.

my husband has 4 men standing for him though haha… gonna be a slightly mismatched wedding 

Post # 51
Member
393 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
pbcgab :  I kind of think what you wrote is rather insulting though I know you didn’t mean it.  You can do whatever you want including being shallow as to who is in your wedding party or open and generous or whatever.  But age, race, weight, eight, looks etc should not be part of deciding your wedding party.  There are some amazing friends or mentors who were older but because they are significant in your life in your eyes they should be a good fit.  I know you didn’t mean this but if we want what’s look good save a few thousand dollars and just use the photo that comes with the frame lol.

Post # 52
Member
1211 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

10 – two sisters which are dual Maid/Matron of Honor, three cousins, three college friends and two childhood-adulthood friends.  There could have easily been more… but 10 is already completely out of control and the limit.  Some of my decisions were political, to keep the peace in the family, but when I think about it, it’s ultimately a representation of who I want standing next to me. 

Post # 53
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 1983

None. No bridal party. Saved us so much hassle and fuss.

Post # 54
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

 I’ll have 5 as long as they say yes. I’m hoping to send bridesmaid giftboxes around christmas.

Post # 55
Member
573 posts
Busy bee

So, I definitely want my 2 sisters. When my older sister got married my younger sister’s girlfriend helped A LOT but wasn’t a bridesmaid. So I would like her to be  bridesmaid too. She is basically another sister to me, we are very close. So that will be my 2 sisters, my sister’s girlfriend…..then I will have my 2 nieces as flower girls and also my little cousin (who is 4 years old) as another flower girl and her brother, so my other cousin as a pageboy. 

Big bridal party but all family 

Post # 56
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

View original reply
elderbee :  No, because she has 3 small kids and is a doctor. She is in another stage of her life than me and my friends, so I wouldn’t want to bother her by having to worry about getting a bridesmaids dress, organizing bachellorettes party, etc. No need to be rude without asking reasons first.

Post # 57
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

 

View original reply
Chris4 :  
View original reply
Chris4 : 

 No, because she has 3 small kids and is a doctor. She is in another stage of her life than me and my friends, so I wouldn’t want to bother her by having to worry about getting a bridesmaids dress, organizing bachellorettes party, etc. I was worrying about her, not me. Also, English is not my first language so I can’t always explaon myself in the best way. 

Post # 58
Member
650 posts
Busy bee

It could be 0 to 3. But leaning towards 0 because I’d rather elope.  We shall see. 

Post # 59
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee

I had 6 bridesmaids. My 4 closest friends, my closest cousin, and my SIL (DH’s sister).

Number wise it was perfect, although I do wish I hadn’t made my SIL a bridesmaid in hindsight. 

Post # 60
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I had one – my sister was my matron of honor. When we started planning, I initially thought I would have between 4 and 7. But my husband is still best friends with his elementary school friends, and he continued to add great friends over the years, so he was agonizing over who to include. He finally got his list down to 11 or something, and then we decided to just do one of each. Worked out since he has a brother and I have a sister. I also have a brother, and he walked me down the aisle, so all of our siblings were included in some way. Including only our siblings worked out great as there were no hurt feelings among potential wedding party attendants. But no one should make you feel pressure to include anyone you don’t want in your wedding. It’s your day!

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