Post # 17
We are basically only invitng family since I have a big family and we are VERY close, my mom is 1 of 8 kids so that means 16 aunts and uncles just from my moms side of the family and we are trying to keep the wedding small at about 75! and I have several cousins that are young so we have opted to have no children at the wedding, mostly for budget purpose, but my aunt actually did this and she had a destination wedding and the family was good with it and I enjoyed the atmosphere with out the kids, it was quiet romantic and elegant which is what we are going for! I think that it is common for people to not include kids at the wedding my boss only invited select kids and she said she did not have any problems. But dont get me wrong I LOVE kids, that is my career lol. But i guess this may be easier for us than some since we are in our early 20’s not many of our friends have kids and most my family said they enjoy going to weddings w/o the kids!
Post # 18
Our venue offered limited space, and my wedding was a black-tie-optional, evening event. Beyond my FI’s two minor children (who were in the wedding) and the other three children in our bridal party, the only children we invited were our nieces and nephews, the children of my two matrons of honor (these children have considered me their aunt, and I have considered them my nieces and nephews for their entire lives), and the two minor children of two of my first cousins. In all, I believe we had 13 children ranging in age from three to 16.
Post # 19
I love your negotiating skills but I’ve told you that already 🙂 Right now we’re only considering the ring bearer/flower girls as our children guests. It wouldn’t be right to allow anyone else (unless maybe it was dire) if we’re going the no kids route since then it starts to feel like we’re being selective. I definitely want to figure out the best solution with my relatives so everyone can enjoy the wedding. I will look into the babysitter idea if many people find they cannot come because of this. However, if they are in a location close to the wedding, will the kids wonder themselves why they can’t come? Also, I hate to say this and be stereotypical or anything, but I’m Asian and I would assume most of my relatives would not be comfortable leaving their kids with a stranger. So the babysitter would have to someone they know or a relative… Which then makes me wonder which relative would be willing to babysit the kids versus coming to the wedding! Maybe I am stressing over nothing and it will all work out in the end, hopefully 🙂 I just don’t want anyone to be hurt over this invitation thing, which at this point seems kind of unavoidable :/
Post # 20
If you end up needing an OC babysitter recommendation…I have a fantastic one that we use regularly. But I totally get the need-a-relative mentality, so maybe it would be best to ask a teen cousin?
Post # 21
Thank you!! I will keep you mind if we find we cannot find a relative babysitter!
Just an idea of how large my family is: my mom has 9 siblings and my dad has 7 (def different time back then, lol). Now most of my aunts and uncles have at least 2-5 kids, and then their kids have at least 2-4 kids, and even some of my second cousins have kids already! So it’s like exponential growth! I really wish I could say everyone’s invited! A PP is right in saying children are a lot of fun at weddings, imo… I find the most enjoyable weddings I’ve been to had children involved, which is why this situation is a hard choice. But then I would have a 400 person wedding like my sister, where we are only planning 200 at the most :/
Post # 22
I would limit it by age or generation, if you want to allow some kids. (e.g. cousin’s kids, but no second cousin’s kids…and no removed-cousin’s kids). Good luck, sounds complex!!
Post # 23
We didn’t want any but we did have two there. That was only because my cousin was able to make it as it worked out perfectly that they we coming through town durning a military move to Texas. Thrilled she was able to come, but her kids were with her and I had to let them come. Worked out great, the kids were well behaved and so sweet.
Post # 24
I don’t really want kids at my wedding, but I know if I don’t invite them half my family won’t be able to come, and I’d rather have them there with kids than not there. A few of my friends also have babies. I’m inviting those kids specifically, and then addressing invitations for church acquantinces with just the mom and dad’s name. If they decide to eschew etiquette (which is 92% likely) and bring them then I’m not going to die, but addressing them that way makes me feel better about it.
The only children who will be invited to the ceremony are those that are related to me and/or fiance or those who are attached to very good friends. I’m guessing there will be at least 20 (6 of which are my nieces and nephews). The reception will be in a church, where I will have a room with a TV showing a variety of Disney and Pixar movies for little ones, including a babysitter or two.
I’m also contemplating putting paper over the tablecloths and letting people have at it with watercolors, but that is still in the “thinking about it” stage.
Post # 25
We are not having kids at pur wedding for 1 its a Destination Wedding and for 2 we both have too many kids in pur family…so we didn’t want the argument of who is going to be the flower girl or ring bearer…If we have a small cocktail reception when we return we might invite kids…but have them in a seperate area (with adult supervision) with activities away from the adults
Post # 26
We’re not having any! If we invited kids, they would total 20% of our guest list and take up spots that could go to adults. We can only have 100 people at our venue, so that was the main reason for there being no kids.
Post # 27
We’re inviting 20 kids (under 18) to the wedding. I hadn’t actually counted until just now!
Post # 28
There won’t be any kids at our wedding
Post # 29
we’re encountering the same problem! The kids would take up spots that we sort of need to give to our adult guests. Sucks that we have to choose one or the other!
Post # 30
We said no children except for family. DH two nephews and my 3 cousins (10 and 13).
Post # 31
We are planning on a big fat zero!