How many kids would you want ideally?

posted 2 years ago in TTC
  • poll: How many kids would you ideally want?
    CFBC : (18 votes)
    8 %
    1 : (21 votes)
    10 %
    2 : (87 votes)
    40 %
    3 : (48 votes)
    22 %
    4 : (21 votes)
    10 %
    5+ : (8 votes)
    4 %
    Undecided : (14 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 16
    7778 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I have 3, which is weird because if you’d asked me when I was younger I would have probably said 1 or 2. That being said, having more kids is exponentially harder. You’d think having 2 kids would be 2x the work- but I don’t find that to be the case. I SHOULD feel like I have 3 kids- but many days it feels like 5.

    Post # 17
    1053 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: City, State

    Me: 1-2 Fiance: 0-1

    We have one and are 90% one and done.

    Before having kids I wanted 2-3 but I’ve definitely changed my mind.

    Post # 18
    1994 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    2 or 3. My plan is to have a 3rd if the first 2 are the same gender and then stop no matter which gender we get, but if we have one of each first then we’d stop at 2. Darling Husband is only sort of on-board with this plan as he only wants 2, but he is one of four brothers so he has a different perspective than I do.

    Post # 19
    676 posts
    Busy bee

    I just don’t know to be honest. I feel like I wont be able to decide until I have my first. Then see how I feel. Then apply the same to two… I have a feeling it may stop at 2 though.

    Post # 20
    977 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2016

    Undecided. We plan to have one then see how we feel. I can see a lot of benefits to only 1, but I can also see us wanting another.

    Post # 23
    187 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2018

    Before I had kids I wanted 4. After having my first (a girl) , I said I wanted 2 (dh was fine with 2) then I had a boy and I took it as a sign from God that I was meant to have two. I had one of each and I was DONE. 


    They say  you just “know” when you are done and I think that’s true. I didn’t feel “done” after my first …….

    Post # 24
    900 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I grew up in medium sized family (4 kids, so big by today’s standards of society). I was always really jealous of the kids who had more of their parent’s attention and less siblings to fight with lol so I went into adulthood with the mindset that I’d have one or two kids at the most. Then I got married and became a mom, started a family and somewhere along the way realized that a bigger family just feels right for me. I have two now and can’t imagine being done. If I had all of the mental, physical, emotional and financial resources in the world I’d have 4 or 5. To maintain the quality of life we all have now, I think our 3rd will have to be our last. And I think I’m okay with that but I’m not crossing anything out.

    Post # 25
    1395 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2020

    This is far in our future for us but I want 4 (grew up one of three kids) and Fiance wants 2 (grew up one of two). For now we agreed on 3, but once I experience pregnancy, see what our finances are at that time, etc., this could very easily change. 

    Benefits of having multiple siblings I found were I more people to play with (especially if I was mad at one of them), didn’t always have to go to mom to complain about a sibling, and was able to fight amongst ourselves instead of dragging a parent into every fight. 

    Post # 27
    9172 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    i always wanted 4. but marrying in my early 30’s then needing IVF to conceive changed those plans.  we are expecting #2 any day now.  we have some embryos frozen.  but it is most likely we will stop at 2.

    Post # 28
    442 posts
    Helper bee

    I’ve alternated between 4 and none, none because I want to raise them myself and there’s no point getting an MD to spend 4-6 years at home taking care of babies and toddlers before they get to attend school for long enough hours for me to go back to work – and between internship and residency and consultant, there seems so little room to take time off for years to have kids.

    But if we were to have kids, I want more than just 2 if we can because I grew up with tons of cousins but the family is shrinking every generation and I want my kids to have that experience of having a plethora of people to play with at family events. SO wants “as many as possible/a lot”, but he’s not the one pushing them out so there’s that.

    Post # 29
    649 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I’d love to have three, maybe more! Only we’re both working full time, and my kids tend to be very bad sleepers – like, they stop napping at 18 months and can stay up to ring in the New Year at that age. I can only take so much of that 🙂 So if we aren’t able to have other kids, I’ll do my best to be happy with how big the family is now.

    Post # 30
    1021 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Financially/mentally/emotionally/physically, 2 is just right for us. We have a 4 year old daughter and 1 year old son, and we are done. 

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