Post # 1
We had originally only wanted 75 at our wedding, but have a confirmed 87. This is fine as we invited 150 knowing that a majority of people couldn’t make it as they can’t afford to travel, especially to the Bay Area, for the weekend. When I tell people how many guests, the comments range from “oh, a nice small wedding” to “thats so many people!” what gives? What is considered a large wedding?
I also see a lot of posts on here about couples inviting 200 people and being worried that they won’t have enough room. Do people factor in that 30% will probably not make it, and if people are traveling, the decline rate is a lot higher?
Post # 2
Ours was small, we invited 65 and 50 attended so a nice turn out 🙂 I would say 150+ is a large wedding.
Post # 3
We have 70 guests invited but only expect 45-50 to actually show because most of my family is out of state as well.
Post # 4
I think it depends on your circle. We have 189 invited to our Destination Wedding, FI’s sister and a friend of mine had over 500 at their weddings. So, to me 500 is large, 300 is moderate, and 150 and lower is small..
Post # 5
We invited 104 and had 86 attend. I consider it small-ish.
Post # 6
forevervirgo: we invited about 115 I think, and 93 attended.
Post # 7
BridetoBee2017: This is another question I have. Who makes up those 300-500 people? Do people invite everyone they know? Are work people and parents friends included?
We definitely stuck to the “close” friends and family. If we hadn’t seen people in a year then they were on the no list. There are even casual acquaintences that I see often that weren’t invited. Same with my fiance. We also didn’t let our parents have their own list of invites. We are paying, so it’s only people we actually know and want there. I feel like we could’ve had a lot more people (but then we’d have to pay for them! Haha!)
I’m just curious as to how people go about deciding who is invited. Is budget the main factor? Family? Etc.
And FWIW; paying for 87 people FEELS like I’m paying for 500.
Post # 8
forevervirgo: We invited 150 people… but we also knew a lot of people wouldn’t be able to come to our middle of nowhere Canadian winter wedding. We expected about 120-125 to come.
There was 110-115 people who attended (including us and bridal party). It was a good number for us, I would have liked less people but it wasn’t possible since my Darling Husband and I have large families.
Post # 9
forevervirgo: We invited 120 including all children and +1s for everyone. I think we ended up with about 60. Almost no one brought children (we had 3 of a possible 20) and there were no +1s that weren’t named on the invite (we had 10-12 people come solo). Most of our invitees were an airplane ride away and there were several that we knew were very unlikely to come but wanted to be sure to extend the invite.
Post # 10
We invited 85-90 expected 60 ended up with 50 due to some last minute cancellations for health and work
Post # 11
forevervirgo: We had about 350 people at our wedding. We had invited about 500 people.
I have a huge family and weddings are the only time we are able to get together. So about 175 of those people were from one side of one family alone. ( I have 26 aunts/uncles on that side, 75 first cousins on that side, plus their spouses, and kids.) The rest of people we invited was other family members, friends, and family friends.
Post # 12
Thanks for all the responses, bees! My finance brain takes over sometimes and I just want more and more data! it’s so interesting to me.
Sounds like family size is the biggest factor in all this. My family is very large, but they can’t afford to travel. And finances family is in Peru! So definitely most of them aren’t coming. We just paid to have his grandmother fly in.
Post # 13
forevervirgo: It depends… FI’s sister had over 500 but our 189 person guest list is mostly FI’s family with very few friends. Fiance has 37 first cousins, aunts and uncles, etc. I literally don’t have a single aunt, uncle, or cousin. My family, not kidding, consists of 10 people. So the majority of our/their list was his/her family. FI’s sisters husband also has a large family so their wedding was mainly family with a decent amount of friends.
My friends wedding on the other hand included A LOT of parent’s friends. When the bride walks around and says how she doesn’t know half the people there, you know the wedding was too big.
I can honestly say out of our 189 person wedding I have seen every single person on our guest list at least twice in the past year. I don’t want our wedding to feel like it is a room full of strangers. As for our AHR, Fiance is a firefighter and bartender so we know a lot of people from the bar he works at and the firehall and since we’re always hanging out in one of those two places the people there are our friends. And, it will be cheap for us to do the AHR since we’re hosting at the firehall and the bar is catering everything including alchol so we were able to invite more people.
Post # 14
Invited 300, had 230 guests that attended.
Post # 15
forevervirgo: oh God Im one of the people here that average has around 300 people (guilty as charged)
In my circle it is custom for the parents to invite their friends as well. We also have big families (think my big fat greek wedding)