(Closed) How many times can you ask?!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
662 posts
Busy bee

Why don’t you feel comfortable writing them?  I know my SO only likes to sign cards.  I typically write them out, then stack them up with a pen and make him sign them.

Post # 4
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

We actually split our card 50/50….but I did type them out first so all my husband had to do was to actually write it out. We made it a goal to get I think 4 done each day, and if either of us didn’t get it done then we’d have to do a chore we hate. Perhaps maybe writing it out for him and just having him write it sign it etc. would help him out?

Post # 5
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My fiance is in Grad school also and that is his excuse for everything too. He usually instead of saying he doesn’t want to do something he makes that excuse and stuff like that he likes me to do because he thinks it will make me closer to his family. Maybe your husband wants you to be closer? or he just doesn’t want to do it.

Post # 6
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

That’s super frustrating :(. I’m in grad school so I also know how handy that excuse can be. Sometimes it’s ligit though too. 

The unfortunate thing is that a lack lot thank you cards being sent usually results in the bride being judged more so than the groom. I’d say write them yourself and get him to sign. 

Post # 7
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

You should write them. They are you in laws and it will be a good step toward them as part of your family.

Post # 8
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Write the one to the parents and grandparents. They know they didn’t teach him to write thank you notes. But getting one from his wife will make their day. (might even make them feel guilty about not teaching him to write than you notes…)

The best man and grooms men either won’t notice they didn’t get one, or will blame it on him. 

Post # 11
7901 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

You should just write them, especially the one to his family. I read somewhere a long time ago and haven’t been able to find it since, but it makes a lot of sense to me, that when couples share the duty, they should write to the opposite side as a sign that they are now a unit and his family is hers and hers is his, etc.

Post # 13
1304 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We each covered our respective sides of the guest list, except that he wrote to my parents and sister, and I wrote to his mom and his grandma.

I finished mine within a few weeks of the wedding.  I nagged and nagged and nagged and he finally wrote his last few around the 6-month mark.  Very annoying.

Post # 14
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I think it should be shared.  If he uses the gifts, he could say thank you as well.

Post # 16
9549 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

He has the time. Grad school is a lot of work (I’ve been there). Regardless, he has time. Tell him that he’s going to finish the cads one evening this week, let him pick the night, then make him write the cards. Offer to help with wording if he would like. But don’t buy the “I don’t have time” excuse. It’s bullshit. It’ll take him less than an hour. Just make him sit down and do it.

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