(Closed) How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: How many times have you been a bridesmaid?

    Never

    1

    2

    3

    4

    5

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    7

    8

  • Post # 17
    Member
    1399 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    Never – I have a no bridesmaid policy.

    I won’t make you a bridesmaid if you won’t make me one.

    Post # 18
    Member
    925 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I have been a bridesmaid twice and a maid of honor once. All times were great… the most recent time (when I was MOH) was a little more stressful/expensive, because it was (a) in the-middle-of-nowhere, Alaska, (b) I had to write a speech, (c) I planned a shower/bachelorette party six months in advance because it was the only time she would be back in the lower 48 (and the shower was the day after my last day of grad school and the bachelorette was on mine and FI’s 4-year anniversary)… SO it was stressful, but so incredibly worth it 🙂

    I can’t wait to (hopefully!) be a bridesmaid in any/all of my remaining BMs’ weddings in the future.

    Post # 19
    Member
    458 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I’ve never been a bridesmaid and I’ve only ever gone to 3 weddings (2 of them were when I was a child).

    Post # 20
    Member
    8482 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    Never. None of my close friends are married yet, dangit.

    Post # 21
    Member
    2949 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I’ve only been a bridesmaid once (March this year) but I’ve been a flower girl twice.

    I had fun the first time and I’m looking forward to being one for my best friend’s wedding next year.

    Post # 22
    Member
    519 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I have been Maid/Matron of Honor once, bridesmaid once, and a flower girl.  It was a little stressful because both weddings were the same month, and I was finishing up student teaching at the time. Being Maid/Matron of Honor I had more responsiblity and was a little more stressful when both sides didn’t agree on somethings I had to intervine and ask the groom what to do?

    Luckly I needed the same colored dress for both weddings, My bff had me wear a different color than the rest of her party, which happend to be my other friends color as well. So I got to wear the same dress twice.

    I wouldn’t trade it for the world though, it was a great experience to be there for my best friend, and I am honored to have her as my Maid/Matron of Honor, along with my sister. As far as my other friend…who is now divorced (we all saw that one coming and actual tried to warn her before the wedding). I was honored to be part of her wedding, and would diff do it again in a heartbeat, we’re actually closer now than we were than :-)…

    Post # 23
    Member
    1517 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @mscuppycake:  I’m in my mid-30’s so at this point, I have been a Bridesmaid or Best Man and an Maid/Matron of Honor 5 times total. Never had a bad experience, there were some things that I disagreed with how the bride handled, but they were never things that impacted me per se. I enjoyed the experiences!

    Post # 24
    Member
    1609 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    Bridesmaid once, Maid/Matron of Honor once, and flower girl once (didn’t count that one).  I’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid again next summer as well.

    Post # 25
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    4 times too many lol. And likely another 1-2 times before I can retire. Being a bridesmaid can be stressful and a huge financial commitment. Like the time I spent almost $1000 on my dress/accessories alone and the marriage didn’t last 5 years! Yikes!

    Post # 26
    Member
    78 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I have been a bridesmaid twice. Once was a positive, fun experience and the other experience was awful. The girl was a friend from high school who LOST HER MIND over her wedding. She was a bridezilla x100000 and ruined friendships with several people in her wedding party. Ugh, the thought of her behavior still makes me cringe.

    Post # 27
    Member
    3028 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Never and my friends know better than to ask.  I doubt any of the single friends would have a bridal party anyway, but the idea of spending the time, energy and so much money wouldn’t be something I would be interested in so I would turn it down UNLESS it was a big deal for them.

    I doubt I ever will be and that is fine with me

    Post # 28
    Member
    1105 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Once

     

    I liked it. She told me beforehand I would have to pay for my dress but that I could choose the style, gave me the website she wanted me to get it from. It was all OK. I don’t think we got a gift, I can’t remember, but at the time she was going to be my future SIL so it was all Ok with me. 

    Post # 29
    Member
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Seven times. number seven this weekend. Have eight and nine coming up.

    The thing to remember is you love the bride and you are doing it for the bride. The issues I have run into with co-BM is usually because people are thinking about themselves and NOT the bride. For instance, I have a wedding coming up in june and my one of my co-MOHs are very selfish, self centered people I have met ina long time. She bullied the bride into being a Maid/Matron of Honor and wants to plan things, but is disorganized and doesn’t want to put money in. Just tell people what to spend.

    My other co-MOH… I’d like to be wrong about my thoughts towards her, if only for the bride’s sake. But she has also been difficult… and while she might have known the bride since forever, she clearly doesn’t know her now. But she is also not thinking about what the bride wants, but what she would like.

    Sorry girls, not about you.

    Post # 30
    Member
    1987 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’ve done it twice, and unless my best friend decides to go through a formal wedding ceremony I’ll never do it again.  I was the only out of state bridesmaid in both weddings and in the 2nd wedding the fact that I couldn’t actually attend any of the events before the actual wedding weekend (please note that I made this crystal-clear to the bride before I accepted her invitation) was used as a cudgel to get me to pay more than my fair share for things like the shower and bachelorette by the Maid/Matron of Honor, who I did not know well.  (I allowed myself to be used like this so that the Maid/Matron of Honor wouldn’t “tattle” on me and upset the bride.)

    If I ever get married I don’t know what I’ll do about attendants.  Honestly, the standard bridesmaid expectations strike me as so onerous/expensive that I can’t imagine asking anyone I actually like to take them on on my behalf!  LOL

    Post # 31
    Member
    839 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Three times for me. The first 2 times were when I was fairly young (19 and 20), and both experiences were pretty low key and didn’t require a lot of extra time or money. It probably helped that the brides were younger and broke like the rest of us.  

    The third time, I was 25 and the experience was a lot more exhausting. The bride (family member) expected more of us, and I ended up spending ~$1000 by the end of it. Part of that was due to her being really strict with our appearances on her wedding day; in addition to purchasing our own dresses, we were required to buy shoes the bride picked out, get french manicures/pedicures and pay to have our hair done at the salon she chose. Then we had to attend an out-of-town, 2 night bachelorette party. It wasn’t awful, but I don’t think the bride ever took a step back and realized how much we were all spending to be part of her wedding. So that experience left a bad taste in my mouth, and I hope I will only be asked to be a maid for my sister’s wedding in the future.  

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