(Closed) how much did you drink alcohol during your pregnancy?

posted 8 years ago in Pregnancy
  • poll: how much did you drink while pregnant (or what would your limits be)?
    Absolutely none : (168 votes)
    58 %
    A few sips throughout the whole pregnancy : (55 votes)
    19 %
    a few glasses (one glass at a time max) throughout the whole pregnancy : (45 votes)
    15 %
    one glass a week (on average) : (12 votes)
    4 %
    a few occasions where i had 2 or more glasses at a time : (5 votes)
    2 %
    Daily or almost daily : (7 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 137
    Member
    3175 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Mrs.Camera:  I drink wine with dinner nightly. My Darling Husband & I eat very much like europeans, and we treat alcohol like europeans, too (i.e. responsible but regular consumption, and it’s not a “forbidden fruit”)! (I drank more alcohol before my pregnancy than I do now). Usually, my “glass” here is rather large, but, when I was pregnant, I considered around 4 oz a “glass” (and, yes, I’ve worked in restaurants, so I know how big that is). As I mentioned in a previous post, I would usually drink half wine/half juice, so it wasn’t even a full 4 oz of wine at a time. You do touch on an interesting point, though, and I think it’s part of the reason that the recommendation for NO alcohol is so prevalent, and that is because quantities and moderation can easily be misunderstood. It’s much easier to avoid altogether than to deal with the gray area between “moderation” and “too much”, so we tend to choose the extreme “no alcohol” recommendation (particularly doctors, as they risk being sued if “in moderation” is misunderstood by the patient).

    Post # 138
    Member
    9816 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    @Cady:  I know, especially now that it’s warm out! Ahhh… heaven. I see a lot of pump and dump in my early breastfeeding days lol

    Post # 139
    Member
    2902 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I have seem many obese pregnant women and think they must be putting much worse things in their bodies than me (fit, very healthy & active) having a glass of wine on occasion. 

    Every single one of my friends drank wine after the first trimester, they all have beautiful healthy kids. Every single one of them. (I’m not from America so it’s not frowned upon)

    My Great Grandma drank, my Grandma drank, my Mum had the occasional wine & guess what, we are all fabulous!

     

     

     

    Post # 140
    Member
    3460 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @blueskies7:  Interesting at all the people attacking  @DeadlyNightshade: for saying “Just not worth it. I just personally could not imagine putting my wants and needs over my unborn child’s.”

    For me (an as-yet childless person), it was offensive not just in the phrasing but in the sentiment itself.  First, she was claiming she never puts her wants and needs over an unborn child.  To me, and clearly others, this is really quite impossible to happen for all 9+ months.  Posters were suggesting ways she likely has done it, even if she didn’t think about it immediately as such.  Second, I also personally disagree with the implicit assumption that this is best.  I believe the mother’s happiness and well-being matters and shouldn’t be 100% subordinate to a fetus (and I can’t say the thought of being merely a baby-carrier is very appealing).  For example, if the mother exercises as recommended every day, but really doesn’t want to do it one day, that unhappyness while exercising is bad for the kid…it’s really a bit of a lose lose scenario.  As with most things in life, it’s a balance. 

    It’s really too bad people are judgmental in general about many personal choices that belong between you & your doctor.  An obese friend of mine with health conditions (which cause her obesity) faces judgment if she opts for a dessert, just like pregnant women faces stares of death for a sip of alcohol.  What started out an interesting thread requesting self-reports turned in to judgment for those choices, self-righteous in some cases for their decisions, defensiveness is others, people calling each other liars, etc.  🙁

    Post # 141
    Member
    2546 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @kay01:  

    I think you, and others are taking this thread way too personally. This thread, like all the others, is a discussion. A discussion is:

    Noun:

     

    1.The action or process of talking about something, typically in order to reach a decision or to exchange ideas.

     2.A conversation or debate about a certain topic.  

    I haven’t seen people call eachothers liars, and I actually think that even though some people (myself included) have opioons that may be ofensive to others that does not mean that we are being rude, judgemental, or self righteous.

    Post # 142
    Member
    3460 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Cash000:  I will bow out on this particular sidethread after this comment, because I think the conversation is getting off track, but as I said, I’m not pregnant.  Have no kids.  Haven’t confronted this issue personally.  Can’t say what I’ll actually do when pregnant.  So no, I’m not taking it personally.  I can find what someone said offensive, without taking it personally.  In fact, I didn’t comment directly on the particular posters remarks initially.

    I didn’t say anyone was rude. People were calling one poster a liar as to whether she was telling her doctor how much she drinks or if deathbydesign’s friend was honest (as opposed to not thinking through all of the possibilites).  Self-righteous/defensive/judgemental, well, actually other people have noted this already.  You for example, have told me specifically that I am defensive.  I skimmed the thread quickly again and the following people also felt there was judgment in posts: Cady, CallmeC, MrsStrawberry24, hisgoosiegirl (by inference), Ree723.  A lot of other referenced people being judgy.  It’s not surprising, it’s a hot topic, but it is unfortunate.

    Ok focusing back on the original topic – one interesting thing to me is that posters cited their husband’s opinion affecting their behavior and decisions.  For those whose husband felt differently than you on this topic, did your husband abstain from alcohol during your pregnancy, or in your presence?  If you were trying to get pregnant did he abstain then?  (My research was that alcohol can affect sperm, so in TTC might actually have an impact, while the other is only support/creating an environment.) 

    Post # 143
    Member
    4272 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @kay01:  Husband was a party person as well, so I wouldn’t say it affected his sperm count. I am not saying it dosn’t at all. Just that obviously, he did not have a problem in this department. It is more about the second part of it, being supportive.

    He originally told me that he heard a glass of wine was fine every now and then. I told him my doctor did not agree with it so I won’t be doing it.  He hasn’t pushed it.

    He drinks on occassion with me not around and probably just one bottle of beer when I am around. Smokes marijuana less so then before and never in front of me.  The decline in drinking is probably more because he know its hard for me to abstain. The smoking due to the unknown risks it could present to a developing fetus. I think he is also working on becoming a suitable father and putting his past behind him, as I am focusing on being a suitable mother. I figured I had to grow up someday…

    Post # 144
    Member
    3175 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Cash000:  Of course it’s a discussion, but certainly you can see how the implication that those who choose to have a drink of alcohol during pregnancy (most after consulting their doctors and studying the risks associated with it) are putting themselves above their unborn children (particularly by someone who’s never been pregnant herself) would be taken personally.

    Post # 145
    Member
    482 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I’d love a mojito right now

    Post # 146
    Member
    3451 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @FauxBoho:  I have seem many obese pregnant women and think they must be putting much worse things in their bodies than me (fit, very healthy & active) having a glass of wine on occasion.

    I wasn’t planning on commenting on this thread anymore, until I read your comment.

    Not only is what you said offensive, but it’s also not true.  Not every fat person eats unhealthy and doesn’t exercise.  I was considered obese when I got pregnant with my daughter.  I ate a VERY healthy diet.  I was also on my feet for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week at my job AND I even managed walks every night.  Body size isn’t always an indicator of person’s health.  And to stick with the topic of this thread, I will add that I didn’t drink any alcohol while I was pregnant.

    Post # 147
    Member
    7899 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    I’m gonna add a historical perspective and remind you all that for most of the history of civilization, people have drunk the majority of their liquids in some alcoholic form. In ancient Egypt, for instance, watered down beer was the staple beverage. In ancient Greece and Rome, it was watered down wine. Why? Because drinking water straight was risky, and the alcohol from fermentation made it safer, so water was mixed with wine on a regular occassion. The proportion of alcohol was generally quite low, and in fact drinking unmixed wine in ancient Greece was a sign that a person had no self control. Yet, somehow, even though millennia of women drank alcoholick liquids all day every day during pregnancies and breast feeding, societies flourished. Plato, Aristotle, Demosthenes, Cicero, Augustus, and probabaly even Jesus himself were birthed into such a world and didn’t suffer from Fetal Alcholo Syndrome.

    Be prudent, but there’s no need to be ridiculous about it.

    Post # 148
    Member
    2095 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @FauxBoho:  I will get a warning if I say what I really want to. I will leave it at the fact that your comments were rude and offensive.

    Post # 149
    Member
    1115 posts
    Bumble bee

    @les105:  

    @Cash000:  “Of course it’s a discussion, but certainly you can see how the implication that those who choose to have a drink of alcohol during pregnancy (most after consulting their doctors and studying the risks associated with it) are putting themselves above their unborn children (particularly by someone who’s never been pregnant herself) would be taken personally.”

    Nope. 

    Especially not after a pregnant woman admitted to it. Which I don’t see a problem with. Notice how I never said that I had a problem with it, except for holding someone else to your own standards?

    What I DO have a problem with is the lack of support that woman have for one another, and the assumption that just because I wouldn’t do something I must have a problem with YOU doing it. Oh please. What a leap.

    The only reason I brought up my friend was in defense of another woman being called out. I found it unnecessary because I think we forget that we have all had different walks in life and made different choices, have different tolerances, etc. I just wanted to show that unusual things DO happen, and we should try to remember that unlikely does not mean impossible. 

    I never said that everybody should think like me, or her, a woman who desperately wanted to keep her child and like I said before, went to extremes. Also, NUMEROUS times I pointed out that I had no judgement towards the other side. So why attack? Because I cant imagine something? I also can’t imagine living in the countryside, does that offend anyone that lives in a rural area? Does that mean that I never will?

    Also, apparently we should edit the TOS so that only pregnant women can comment on pregnant posts, African American brides on AA posts, and politicians on every crazy ass political post that comes through this place. Since that seems to be what everybody jumps to when they don’t like a particular opinion. 

    I’ve definitely learned my lesson, I will no longer try to preach tolerance, acceptance, and an open mind. From now on I will just stay out of it. This is my last comment on the topic, I’m back to happily reading. Feel free to go back to your mudslinging, enjoy. 
     

    Post # 150
    Member
    3175 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @DeadlyNightshade:  oh, please, give me a break. Saying that you would never put your needs before your child cannot be seen any other way than implying that those who drink are putting their needs above their child. How else could you read that? Sorry, girl, that’s not tolerance. And, FTR, I never said women who never had a child couldn’t comment on threads, I said women who never had a child judging women about how they handled their pregnancies is going to rub people the wrong way. 

    Post # 151
    Member
    1115 posts
    Bumble bee

    @les105:  I’m getting the impression from your last post that you’re not actually reading what I wrote, but I expected it. Peace and blessings to you, I hold no ill will, and I hope that maybe when things calm down, you can take in the positive. 

    The topic ‘how much did you drink alcohol during your pregnancy?’ is closed to new replies.

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