- 7 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
@swanks4tw: I promise that MrsPanda99 doesn’t care what you think of her in the slightest. Here’s a wink back, which doesn’t make what you say polite (just so you know): 😉
I never said you had to have as much money as I do to have kids. I said, I don’t believe people should have kids they can’t afford (whatever that means to your family). If they can’t even scrap together any savings, I am not sure how they could have the extra income required to raise children. I gave the number that I am comfortable with for our family (and in fact it is actually quite a bit higher). Not everyone is going to be the same. But if both parties are in school and not working stable jobs, it may not be the best time to bring children into the world. What if a medical expense comes up? Just become riddled with debt or have someone else pay it?
On forums, we give opinions. That is my opinion and I’m entitled to it. You are free to state yours, but there is no need to bash mine in the process. Just because you disagree doesn’t make me wrong and you right. I grew up never wanting for anything and I turned out just fine – I own multiple rental properties, have a successful career, and a healthy relationship. I will give my children the same opportunities. I’m not interested in saying, “no, we can’t afford that,” not taking them on family trips, not letting them go on school trips, or not join activities they want to try.
I will raise my kids my way, you raise your kids your way. No need to be snarky to someone you don’t even know. Thanks anyway though.
we are planning on starting to TTC soon, because my fertility is an issue and we don’t want to put it off. We don’t have much in savings right now because I just finished school and started working again 5 months ago, so we had been living on one income. we are planning on saving 1/2 my income each month so when/if I get pregnant we should have a decent nest egg by the time I have to stop working. I plan on working for as long as I can but my daughter was born early so I’m at a higher risk for that happening again. We would be totally fine living off of just his income, but things would be tight so it would be nice to have a good little nest egg. Depending on how long it take sus to get pregnant we should have a good 8-16k in the bank. If we have less than that we will work it out! we live pretty simply and I am a big believer that kids don’t need a ton of crap to make them happy. I grew up in near poverty and I turned out fine, so I don’t think raising kids in a household that occasionally struggles is doing them a disservice
I don’t believe people should have kids they can’t afford (whatever that means to your family).
+10000. That is the main reason DH and I are waiting to begin TTC. We want to have at least 6 months worth of living expenses (which will actually be around $20k) before even thinking of trying. We are also of the opinion that our children should never want for anything. However, we still want to travel and have ‘us’ time, so we’re pushing off TTC for ~5 years (at which time we’ll have more than enough saved) anyway.
You can never be “fully prepared” for a child, but we can make damn sure we’ll be able to provide everything that child needs.
My husband and I are not yet. But we will likely be 75-100k in debt when we do. He is in school to be a professional and the schooling is very expensive. He’ll make a lot when he graduates though so it won’t be a huge issue to pay the loans off. We don’t want to dely having kids and moving on with life just because he is a student still.
Seriously, we own rental properties and if tenants don’t pay then I don’t just have our mortgage to cover – I have 10 others! Toronto is far from cheap and there is a certain quality of life that I am used to. For our family, it is a minimum of $20,000 and that is why I gave that number. It depends what your living expenses are, what your goals are, what kind of lifestyle you intend to lead, etc.
@candy11: We had about $6k in savings. That was all from our wedding which was 5 months before TTC. We both have *good* jobs and are in the camp where we don’t care to have the best or need a ton, so it works for us. I also don’t think babies need to be as expensive as the average number suggests, again depending on how you live and what you spend your money on. As long as you can live happily within your means, then don’t let some of the stats/numbers you read online scare you. 🙂
@candy11: Wow I’m glad you posted this. It’s good to consider this a few years before TTC! I am also curious how much parents generally spend setting up a nursery. I feel like I could spend thousands investing in furniture, high chairs, carseats, decor, toys, books, bedding, bottles–Will you be using your savings for any of these things or do you just expect most of these items to be gifted at the baby shower?
I think you need to have enough to feel like you have enough. That could be $100k and that could be $500. You just need to be comfortable enough to not stress about it and be able to provide a happy home for your children.
For what it’s worth, when I was growing up our family went through a lot. There were years that dad brough home multiple 6-figure salaries. And there were years that we lived on less than $20k.
Our family was closer and I have better memories of the “poor” years. Having cool stuff and going on vacation was fun, sure, but that was just how life was. We didn’t know we had it good until we didn’t. When we didn’t we appreciated everything. We helped around the house, we saved money too, and our vacation was to the zoo – which was so much fun! I’m sure it was hard for my parents, but it made us better people.
We always keep 6 months worth of living expenses in the bank, so there’s that money. And since House Republicans cannot get their act together and pass a clean CR, we are living off of that emergency savings while we are both furloughed. Yay. :/ We are also setting aside the money necessary for the TTC medical interventions we will require. We’re budgeting $15k, but that number may need to increase. And then we will be saving for the duration of the pregnancy to replace the money we just spent on medical bills to be prepared for pregnancy/birth complications, NICU stays, etc. Bringing a baby into the world has a lot of potential complications, and we want to at least be financially prepared for them.
DH and I have two years worth of savings, just in case we both end without jobs at the same time. His insurance, which I am on, its actually pretty good. It covers close to 100% of everything and my co pay is very minimul. Everyone has a very different approach and mind set on what one should have or do before having kids. In my opinion, lets say your baby was a pleasant oops, then you make it work before that little nugget gets here. My parents made it always work for all of their 8 children. They never once got help from the government or anyone else. It is all what you feel comfortable with. That’s my opinion. Hopefully you and your hubby can come up with something that is comfortable and reasonable for the two of you. :))
I’m in Canada so health care isn’t an issue, but we want to have 6 months of living expenses in the bank (including my student loan payments, our car payments, groceries… everything) plus enough to cover baby purchases.
We have a good amount of money in the bank right now (enough to cover our basic living expenses for well over a year, if not two), but its money that we don’t touch, so we are going to save our “baby money” on top of that. Also, Canada has excellent maternity leave policies, but because I’ll be self-employed when I finish school, this doesn’t really apply to me. This is why we need 6 months of living expenses in the bank, so I know I have those 6 months with baby worry-free before I need go back to work.
I want to have at least $3000 in savings plus any extra 3 months of my pay. So $7200.
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