(Closed) How much did you have on your wedding registry? How did you pick it all out?

posted 5 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
4524 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

We started from stratch too, as we were more traditional and both lived with our families. I had some cheap kitchen stuff from college, and we both had a teenage bedroom set. That’s it. It’s okay to register for some bigger things, but make sure there’s enough at a lower price range too. As far as having too many things on there, people who know you live at home will get it. I personally wouldn’t go out and buy anything now, either. We began our home search last January, and in my excitement, I built up a little stash of house stuff. Well, everyone and their mother wanted to share in our celebration of uniting in marriage, and if anything we have a bit too much! The stuff I bought actually went to a friend who was moving out on her own and wasn’t surrounded by family like we are. So, yeah, don’t buy too much!

Post # 3
4524 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

As far as picking things you like, it can totally get overwhelming if you look at too many things. Our process was duel elimination. Find a shower curtain you like? Great, save it. If you see something else, compare just those two and pick a winner. Don’t look at 10 things at once. We did that for paint colors too. Rather than being surrounded by paint chips, we picked one and then did our little head to head battles.

ETA: do you have the apartment yet? If not, register for more basic and universally needed things. Like, you could buy 2 blue shower curtains and end up with one green bathroom with a shower door, but you’ll surely need pots and pans no matter where you end up.

Post # 4
4524 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Oh, and we had about 120 things, which I know sounds like a ton. But, that included, for example, 10 placemats, 4 washcloths, 6 kitchen towels/dishcloths, so it certainly wasn’t 120 big ticket items!

Post # 5
406 posts
Helper bee

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xstitchbride425:  Fiance and I are somewhat in the same circumstance. He went straight from college dorms to grad school dorms, and then I moved back into the country recently (you can’t really take stuff with you when you move from country to country, it’s insanely expensive). Ergo, we have nothing. In the interm, I’m living with my parents, but when we get married we’ll have just about nothing (I have bedroom furniture and he has a frying pan, ha).

Our trick is to edit, edit, edit. What do we absolutely need vs. what we would like. For example, I would love to have a waffle iron. But do we need a waffle iron? No, not really. You can live without a waffle iron. Again, I’m a sucker for coffee mugs. But do I really need 15 of them? Nope, 8 will do just fine.

You will have to purchase some items yourself, it will be impossible to get everything from your registery for a new home. So make sure you’re bugeting for that in the mean time. 

As far as how many gifts you should register and at what price, Zola, an online registry, has some great statistics. They suggest registering for 236 if you invite 200 people (I think this is too many, but that’s just me, I’d probably go with 180 just in case), and they recoments about 45% of your registery be $50 or under, 40% be $100 and under, 10% be 150 and under, and 5% be $250 and under.

All the best as you and your man start a new life! Hope this was somewhat helpful.

Post # 6
3185 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

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alexa62:  I have 150 guests in total being invited to the wedding and will be having two showers. (I live one the ast coast but my family is on the west coast so one here in Mass and another in So Cal) My idea is as 10 items get removed I will add 10 more and  so that way there is never barely anything. I have seen that happen to registries where you’re like oh I will buy it tomorrow and then there is nothing there.

Post # 7
2178 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Its much more common for people to be annoyed with a lack of items on a registry (especially affordable items) but I don’t think that there is such thing as too many (ok well 500 items or like 20 stores is too many)

I very much agree with working more on basics that you need no matter where you go…. especially if you don’t have a place/furniture yet. I think that setting up your kitchen (dishes, serving items, pots & pans, knives, silverware etc) is a better option (and gifts you will likely keep “forever”) than shower curtains and cutesy bathroom decor (matching trash can & toothbrush holder type stuff)

For my registry I went very basic and all neutral so that no matter what happens (ie even though we bought a house before the wedding we hadn’t moved in so I didn’t know the exact colors we would paint etc/ if we decide to move in 5 yrs or something bc of kids or work or ??) that my towels and stuff would still work (I got shades of grey – a medium grey and a darker stone grey) and I could mix and match so if I don’t always have 3 bathrooms its not a waste

Post # 8
4891 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

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alexa62:  Before we got engaged, we had only lived together for 4 months. Prior to that, we each owned our own homes, which were fully furnished. So, when we made the decision to move in together, we purged a lot of our things (on both sides) that may have been duplicates of something we each had, and kept the better of the two. However, when it came to registering… we again went through all of our items and decided that we would like to uprade or replace a lot of things, and just went from there.

I looked at a lot of those “What should I register for” lists onlines, and kind of went off that as a starting point – in terms of what we wanted to upgrade/replace… or what we may have always wanted but never went out and actually bought.

We had 3 registries (Target, BBB, and JCP), and I think only a couple things overlapped on a few, depending on a style of something. But, after the information was provided to guests and gifts started to be bought – I’d constantly go in and review, and add more, or delete, if needed. My #1 registry item was a KitchenAid mixer. But, after thinking about it… we have NO room for one of those at this time, so I deleted it and added a new hand mixer to replace an old one I had gotten YEARS before.

Most of the things we upgraded were kitchen utensils, plates, flatware, glasses (no more plastic or mix-mash ones), pots, towels, bedding sets, and small kitchen appliances. It was nice finally having things that were “ours” versus “his” and “mine”.

Since you seem to be starting from scratch, check out the registry lists online and start a conversation. Most will say china… but we didn’t need it, so we didn’t register. Get the basics and go from there. I know we went browsing those stores and writing items down on a notepad before actually going in, or doing it online. That seemed to help too.

Post # 9
1338 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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I feel like our registry was perfect.  My strategy was to focus on big ticket items that would take a long time to acquire on our own because of the price.  In my circle people like giving those things most and they will team up and go in on expensive items together.  Then I just filled in with some smaller ticket essentials.  Sticking to ESSENTIALS is the best way to start.  

I wouldn’t register for something like a shower curtain because it is cheap and easy to get on my own and my tastes might change, etc.  

I registered for & received 4 All Clad pots & pans.  A 9 piece Wustof knife set.  A large copper beverage chest (for entertaining).  Wood salad bowls.  Some serving bowls & platters.  A lasagna baker.  A nice 5 piece bakeware set. Three gass storage container sets. A few grill accessories. Maybe a dozen cooking & serving utensils and a good supply of flour sack towels. I also allowed for gift cards from my registry stores and we got a few of those too.

Things like that are things that you know you’ll need your whole life, no matter where you live.  And high quality pieces may just last your whole life too, and they were serve you very well.  It is so nice cooking with high quality pots and pans.

Another thing to note – don’t register too early and then forget about it. Things like serving platters, decorative towels, seasonal drinkware set, etc. often sell out and are discontinued.  (Thats another reason to avoid those types of things for the most part). So be sure to keep an eye on your registries once you create them, so if something disappears you can replace it with another version.

Post # 10
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016 - NYC

We’re registered on BB&B and Macy’s and both say that you should have 2x the number of gifts as guests. I would say in your case, definitely follow that rule, especially if you are having any showers.

For me, Fiance and I have both lived on our own before and we’ve been living together for 18 months already (we will have been living together for 2-1/2 years when we get married), so we’re doing a small registry and hoping people give us money instead which would be more useful in our situation. We want to be able to put a down payment on a house in the next 5-10 years (which in NYC is a massive financial investment!). 

However, there are things we are asking for on our registry that we would like to replace. We want new flatware, for example, because ours is a mis-matched collection of about 4-5 different sets from college, our own apartments, other people, etc. We’re also asking for new Calaphon cookware and bakeware since what we currently have is both cheapy, old (and in bad shape) and mis-matched. There’s also some things that we just want, like a KitchenAid mixer – I’m a big baker, and it’s always been a dream to have a standing mixer! My grandma had planned to buy that for us, probably since I first mentioned it (it was the big item I kept referring to before we got engaged that I wanted on a registry), and she is getting it for us now so we can start using it.

Our big gift to ourselves after the wedding is a new bed (we currently have a full sized bed, and since Fiance is 6’4 it’s a bit tight), so we have queen sized sheets on the registry since we don’t have any. But we’re not putting the bed on the registry. We are planning to use some of the money we get from the wedding to buy the bed. 

Our stratgy for our registry has been to put things that we wouldn’t otherwise buy ourselves. Such as a really nice high end knife set, high quality pots and pans (for example, the Calaphon set we have on our registry is a 12-piece set that at Macy’s is currently on sale for $350 and has a full lifetime warranty), egyptian cotton sheets, Lenox flatware, etc. We’re fairly frugal so most of our stuff is from like Target and IKEA. Which is fine, but the quality is reflective of the cost. So I’m very excited to get really good quality stuff that will last. 

And don’t forget the cheaper random items too. For example, we put a meat thermometer on our registry, since it’s something we really need and constantly talk about but we haven’t bought one. I know many people like to buy several smaller items and put them together as a set/basket for wedding gifts, and especially for showers. So be sure to have plenty of items in the $10-30 range that can be put together in a theme.

Post # 11
3875 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

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alexa62:  I am in the same boat. Fiance and I live with my parents while I trudge through grad school. We don’t have anything for when we move out. I just registered for a lot of necessities and essentials plus some items I really wanted. I don’t think I have an absurd registry for the amount of people we are inviting. Regardless, I’ll want the 20% off after the wedding anyways. 

Just register for what you want. Most of your family/friends will know that you are just starting out, so I don’t think anyone will judge you. You want to make sure you have many options at several price points. Someone may want to buy you one gift for $150 or someone may want to buy you five gifts for $50, so make sure you have options for everyone. They say you should have two gifts per guest for a “healthy” registry. That’s what I was told at BBB. 

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