(Closed) How much did you make your bridesmaids spend?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
Member
19 posts
Newbee

$0 – I’m not making my BMs pay a cent. And i’m a budget bride $7000 budget total. None of my girls are massive dress wearers and I hated the thought of asking them to fork out $100 for something they will never use. So i’m paying for dresses and hair. Make up is DIY.

Though when i was a Bridesmaid or Best Man recently for one of these girls it cost me all up $500 – I dont think she actually understood how much she asked her girls to fork out in the end.

Post # 18
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@Liss13:  that sound about right … and that’s just for the day of!  I was Bridesmaid or Best Man once and calculated that I spent just shy of $3000 flying to bride’s hometown to attend ALL wedding functions, travelled out of town for bachelorette and wedding gift/shower gift.  There were a few moments where I thought it was getting a bit out of hand, but by wedding day, I didn’t mind at all, because I love her just so much!  It’s a crazy time, but that’s why your Bridesmaid or Best Man should be people that are close enough they don’t mind it.  But I totally understand if finances aren’t wonderful and you accept not knowing in advance how much it actually entails.

Now that it’s my time around I’ve asked girls that I am very close with, and have made it clear (we don’t all live in the same city), that I don’t in any way expect them to be present at every single thing, and if I find out they spent a ridiculous amout of money at the end of it all, I would be super upset.  I’ve already hired my MUA and she only does parties of 4+ during wedding season, and her fees are steep.  I love her work, but will not force my wedding party to pay.  I will either foot the whole bill, or simply say, pay what you think is appropriate and I’ll cover the rest.

Post # 19
Member
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Nothing, I paid for their dresses(a whopping $11 each) and their hair and makeup. They wore shoes they owned. 

all of them were either just graduating or working minumum wage jobs. I didn’t want to make them pay for things they couldn’t afford. 

Post # 20
Member
1143 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

The most expensive dress was around $140 with taxes, I think, and that was my MOH’s. She also had alterations done, while the other two BMs did not. For shoes they probably spent about $15, because we all found some on clearance that worked (plus they had long dresses, so it didn’t really matter on shoes thinking back). Jewelry probably another $10 from Claire’s, and I paid for our hair, makeup was free, same with nails. So $200 would have been tops.

Post # 21
Member
2868 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m not asking my bridesmaids to really pay anything.  I bought their dresses, shoes, and jewelry.  They are doing their own hair/makeup.  We might all go get mani/pedis together the day before, but that’s not a requirement at all.  My Maid/Matron of Honor is from in town, so she doesn’t have any travel expenses.  My sister is coming from across the country, but my parents are paying for her flight, and she’s staying with my parents so no cost there.  My other Bridesmaid or Best Man is coming from a few states away, but we are paying for her plane ticket, and she is staying with my Maid/Matron of Honor so doesn’t have to pay for a hotel. 

My Maid/Matron of Honor is paying for my bridal shower, but that was her decision, not a demand.  It’s also being held at my parents house, so it’s not tooo big an expense.  I think her dad is also helping her out a bit with it.

I think its absolutely ridiculous how much some brides expect.  But then again, it also depends on the BMs finances.  My sister has money, but my Maid/Matron of Honor and other Bridesmaid or Best Man are totally broke.  I don’t want my wedding to be a burden on them, so I made the decision to pay for these things.  What matters to me is to have them there; I just see these costs as part of the wedding budget 🙂

 

Post # 22
Member
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My girls paid $100-$120 on their dress. They were asked to wear black shoes and I know for sure that 2 of the 3 decided it was a good reason to buy new shoes so we’ll say an additional $20-$40. They’re all getting their hair done and are expecting to pay for that, but I’m surprising them by paying for that.

The kicker is the 3 nights in a hotel and the travel to MN for the wedding. So that’s an additional $300 or so.

Post # 23
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Crickey it’s expensive to be a bridesmaid in the US! In the uk the bride typically picks up the bill for bridesmaids…I had one maid of honour and a bridesmaid, and I paid for their dresses ($170 each) hair ($30 eah), make up $20 each a gift- bag for my maid of honour, perfume for my bridesmaid ($50 each), jewellery ($30 each) and lunch whilst getting readyYou don’t think one should be out of pocket for ‘the honour! Of being a bm, but then a of fee bar is unheard of in the uk, so it’s swings and roundabouts really. 

Post # 24
Member
1341 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@Liss13:  In September I’ll have been a Bridesmaid or Best Man 7 times (and 8 times with the next wedding I have coming up). The September wedding is one of the most inexpensive weddings I have been a part of, but it’s still not cheap. No matter what, as a Bridesmaid or Best Man is roughly about $1000 for everything, from start to finish.

 

No matter how you try and cut corners for the BMs, it still ends up being expebnsive. No matter what, weddings are expensive, end of story.

 

And the whole “I’ll pick a dress you can wear again” is a bunch of BS. I have 7 dress I will never wear again.

Honestly, I don’t think $400 is that bad. It’s actually SUPER cheap.

Post # 25
Member
1680 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Liss13:  My bridesmaids spent $95 for their dresses including alterations. They can wear whatever shoes they want; they don’t have to get their hair done; they don’t have to get their makeup done. They don’t have to buy jewelry. 

 

 

 

My friends are shocked by how laid back I am about this whole wedding thing. lol

 

Post # 26
Member
1680 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@MangoSong:  Wow. $1000? How?? That must be including travel.

Post # 27
Member
1341 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@OnceUponATime:  Nope. Not at all. That’s everything start to finish, from engagement party, gifts, bach, bridal shower, dress, hotel for wedding and all the nitty gritty in between.

 

Post # 28
Member
706 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Don’t know what they spent.  They wore dresses that they chose (I think one was around $100, but I know for a fact she has worn it multiple times again; one was about $50?)  They chose shoes (again, no idea what they spent).

No hair.  No makeup – they did themselves. (and mine!  one of my bridesmaids did my makeup AND hair – she’s not a pro at all).

Travel – none.  The one that was farthest away stayed with Darling Husband and I the night before and had our keys for the night of.

Post # 29
Member
4655 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I told them to buy any purple dress (any shade of purple they like) that is tea length or shorter, so they decided their dress budget. Most of them seem to have used this as an excuse to buy a fun dress and spent between $50-$80, but they could have spent $5 at the thrift shop and that would have been fine too.

There’s no shower, and no special bachelorette party, but we are doing a joint AFTER wedding party (travel timing issues) that I expect them to go to. Again, they choose their budget. The base charge for the party is about $15 or so, but if they want to get extra food and drinks at the place where we’re having it, they’re welcome to spend more.

We’re DIYing hair and makeup, so again… up to them what they want to do.

The only absolute fixed cost I demanded was that I wanted the shoes to be the one matching thing, and those cost about $70. They’re cool, rewearable, comfortable shoes, so mostly everyone was down with that. The one Bridesmaid or Best Man who privately said it was a little too pricey for her to be comfortable with, I just bought her the shoes because while I wouldn’t totally mind her wearing something else-but-similar (as she offered to do) I didn’t want her to feel left out due to money.

There’s also travel costs, but not much I can do about those, sadly. Everyone’s pretty scattered, so no matter what city I picked, nearly everyone would be traveling. I picked a fairly central place where most of them have friends and family they can opt to crash with if they don’t want a hotel. (Not on purpose, it just happens to be near where most of my bridesmaids grew up.)

If I were a bridesmaid of mine on a fairly tight budget, I might end up spending $120-$150, but the sky is kind of the limit beyond that, since they could opt to buy a more expensive dress, spend more on food and drink at the party, get a hotel, etc. etc. But they don’t have to. 

Post # 30
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2000

$150 for the dress

 

Optional: $88 for makeup + lashes (all of them wanted professional airbrushed makeup)

 

Their own beige shoes: Free

 

Doing our own hair: free

 

Optional: Hotel stay $300 for 2 nights

 

I’m trying to keep it low as possible for everyone as I know weddings are expensive.  They threw me a crazy bachelorette party in Vegas at the Cosmo and dinners at michelin rated restaurants all weekend, so no idea how much they spent.  I didn’t ask for that though.  Love my girls <3

 

Post # 31
Member
603 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’m letting the girls pick their dresses, and the one they’re looking at is $150. Shoes are whatever they want. Hair and make up is $100 each which I’m paying for. I’m also hunting around for deals for mani/pedis which I’ll also cover.

So all they’re paying for are $150 for the dress and whatever their shoes cost.

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