- 4 months ago
We spent around 10k on a smaller wedding. That covered my dress, his suit, makeup, food and drinks, the venue for the reception, the photographer, flowers, and rented furniture.
I ordered the flowers online and made my own bouquet – it was absolutely gorgeous. We got some dried lavender from friends and decorated tables with that and greenery. I made 2 wedding cakes and a cheesecake with blackberry sauce. I did my own makeup and hair and I really, really regret that. I wrote the entire ceremony, which took place at a gorgeous waterfall in the forest, and then we drove to wine country to a mansion we rented on airbnb. People still talk about the flowers, the cakes, the waterfall, the mansion with the incredible view. Our photographer was a splurge and we did get some great photos from her.
We spent more money on my ring and the honeymoon (3 weeks in Japan and the Phillippines) and I’m so glad we did that. I wear my ring every day and I absolutely adore it, and our honeymoon was incredible.
I have a really large extended family. A few of them are upper middle class to wealthy and had some lavish weddings. As a guest, I really don’t think it was worth it. For example, my cousin’s wedding was 80k and honestly I did not enjoy it 80k worth. The venue was fine, the food was fine, the music was fine…but she could have spent 20k and it all would have been equally ok. In the end, it was the same as every other wedding that I barely remember. I don’t care about the quality of the food for one meal or if I have to buy my own alcoholic drinks for a few hours. I care when the couple does something that is special to them and full of their own personality. For example, I remember the couple that brought in African dancers because the bride studied traditional African dance. I remember the couple that set up karaoke because a lot of their friends were singers. One couple made shortbread cookies shaped like teapots and flavored with different teas, another brought in a supermarket cake with a cartoon character on it because the groom’s last name was the same as this character. None of these weddings were especially fancy or expensive, but they were all far more memorable than the lavish ones were, and I had a better time.