Post # 1
I know people have their views about engagement parties and how they are a waste or a money making scheme, but the area I live in it is pretty much a common and even expected thing. I’m not currently engaged yet but know I will be sometime soon and have already started planning our engagement party. We both have big families and have a lot of very close family friends so the expected turn-out is 150. Now the thing that annoys me is that it’s all looking at about $15,000 is costs! That isn’t including outfits or rings. So my question is to find out what others have paid and determine if I should seriously consider doing something with just our family and maybe a few friends (70ish people) and upsetting everyone else seeing as we are still considered good friends or just sticking to the original plan? I know that is a ridiculous amount to spend for an engagement… Finance-wise parents are paying (tradition) and they don’t care the cost as long as I’m happy but I will definitley feel guilty..
Post # 3
Isn’t an engagement party usually thrown by someone else, like the parents? We didn’t have one.
Post # 4
@EmelK: Why should it cost $15000? My parents paid for the engagement parties for both me and for my sister (like you say, totally normal here in Australia to have one), but there was no meal served. So it was just like a regular 21st party or something: open the house up and supply drinks and nibbles. I can imagine drinks for 70-150 people costing close to $1000 (which I’m guessing is about what our parties cost, each), but where does the rest of the money go?
Post # 5
@paula1248: It’s going to be held in a hotel reception room so it is pretty much the cost of a wedding held for 150 guests. The decoration, lighting, centerpieces and draping of one wall are all going to be hired as the hotel doesn’t offer them or doesn’t have a range that I like.
Post # 6
Wow that’s a lot of money for an engagement party… my best friends through me one, and it was held in our backyard. We had about 30-35 people. Only both our immediate family members and best friends were invited. It was simple, small and fun. And we had blast announcing who are bridal party was. Gave them cute little gifts asking them to be our Bridesmaid or Best Man, Groomsmen, etc. The cost with food and decorations included probably came out to $500-600. It was perfect.
My humble opinion is telling you to just save the cash for the wedding… but if it means that much to you, go for it! 🙂
Post # 7
I’d find a different venu that cost seems outrageous.
I’ve been to heaps of engagement parties over the year and no one I know has ever had to spend that much. I think your crazy to spend that much I think your better off using it towards the wedding!!
Post # 8
I’m having an engagement party in September, and i’m having a 3 course sit down meal for about 100 people and it will cost approx $10,000, that including a cake, centrepieces etc. My partner and I have huge families so 100 people is only scratching the surface and ive had to cut my list quite alot. However, i do plan on inviting them all to the wedding.
Another option i was going to go for was to rent out a hall and have caterers come but the costs were way too high, i would have had to hire everything from chairs and tables to knives and forks! Again, another option was a backyard party, but the thought of it raining was too stressful for me.
Hope that helps!
p.s i live in Sydney
Post # 9
@alicia_cherryblossom: I’ve also considered these options and even thought of a restaurant but it worked out the same price practically plus no one has enough space for 150 guest! I’ve also considered doing something at home but again not enough space plus I don’t want to put anyone through the hassle of cooking and cleaning.
P.S I live in Wollongong so we are neighbours 😉
@CaliBeeBride0813: @Holly77: The thing is it’s not my money to put towards the wedding. I’m a bit of a perfectionist and don’t want to feel like I’ve missed anything so I think that’s put the cost up a lot as well.
Post # 10
Ours is costing $5,000 maximum (hoping to spend closer to $3,500 though) but being funded by our parents. We are just hiring out an elegant private room, putting on a bar tab that includes beers, cider, wine and bubbly plus serving substantial canapés.
I understand this is a bit different to the seated event you have in mind, but I thought engagement parties were a little less formal and the wedding is usually where you’ll go all out?
$15,000 is ridiculous though! Our venue costs for the wedding won’t even be nearly that much for three courses incl. dessert buffet and all drinks for 110 people!
Post # 11
- Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House
Ours cost about 12k… it was basically a smaller scale wedding.
Post # 12
Ours will be approximately 3000 for about 45 people hosted on my parents property. There will be catering but only desserts and canapés -about 5-6 per person – to cut down costs.
Post # 13
This seems to be the norm in Australia? Engagement parties are not that common in the US (at least in my world), and they are always hosted by someone else (usually the parents). One never throws/plans and engagement party for oneself. All the guests to the engagement party have to be invited to the wedding so that kind of forces people to know their guest list ahead of time – or just make it small with family and closet friends.
the area I live in it is pretty much a common and even expected thing
Not sure of your financial situation…. but if something puts me financially outside of my comfort zone and I was not able to pay for something or simply did not want to, then I would not care how common or expected that thing is.
Post # 14
A friend did it for us, but I’m guessing $350-500 for 35? She over bought considerably for the bbq she admits.
Post # 15
engagements parties i’ve been to are backyard affairs. Everyone comes over to the house drinks and some nibbles are provided, end of story.
Post # 16
$150 for the food and the keg. Bonfire was free at our house. 😉