Post # 1
Of late, a few people at work have started doing a regular “Friday night drinks”. Its really just a core handful of 5-6 people and then whoever else. I went once but now I keep getting asked to go, and its really not my thing.
I’ve been that way with all my jobs (spent at least 3 years in each with many of the same people). Team lunches and coffee runs sure, but Ive never really extended my work relationships outside of work.
I get along well with my colleagues, and some of them I’d definitely call “work friends”, not just “people I work with”. We know a fair bit about each other, and I’d say I’m “myself” around them, talk about our lives outside of work and whatnot.
But I’m happy just doing that at work I do have some past colleagues that Id now consider friends in that we catch up for dinners or coffees if we are in each others’ town, and I can see that being the case if I move on from thia job too.
I guess, Ihave other people that I want to spend my non-work time with. But at the same time I feel like it will change the work dynamic if Im one of the only ones not going out regularly with everyone. I realised something else too, all the regulars are single and Im not, if that makes a difference.
Post # 2
I used to see a couple of colleagues regularly outside of work, as in catching up on weekends and after work. One has now left, and the other has put me in an extremely awkward position at work due to her negligence, and I just can’t bring myself to want to socialise much with her anymore. I’m pretty sad about it to be honest!
Post # 3
It’s a tough situation. When I first started in the work force I was more than happy to be open and honest with people and be friends. Sadly over the past few years it’s been more difficult. Not only have I left and started new ones but it’s difficult to know who you can and can not trust. Luckily I have met great individuals I still meet with and can honestly call them my friends. Those that were simply “work friends/acquaintances” are no longer in my life but that’s OK.
Post # 4
My company definitely has a culture of colleagues socializing frequently. I voted “occasionally” in the poll because relative to my colleagues I engage much less, but I realize now that compared to ‘normal’ I still socialize outside of work on my own accord very frequently (i.e. like every weekend that I’m not traveling…and that’s not including work-organized events)
I’d say the vast majority of my friend group are work colleagues, but given that I knew nobody when moving to the city and my job is long hours and lots of travel, it makes sense that it’s work colleages that I end up making plans with! Some colleagues who grew up nearby have non-work friends but even they still hang out with colleagues quite a lot in their spare time.
Even before this job I socialised a lot with my colleagues. DH on the other hand almost NEVER socializes — he really likes his colleagues but has hard and fast “work/private life” lines.
Post # 5
I prefer to keep my personal and professional lives separate. So I will attend work functions, but that’s it. I just think sometimes it can blur the lines.
I have a handful of colleagues on Facebook, but it’s a few select individuals, and I don’t post very often (and am careful what I post when I do: absolutely nothing work-related, nothing political, etc)
Post # 6
This is me as well.
I have been forced to separate my work life & personal as I’ve been a manager at two different jobs. I have learned the hard way that being friends outside of work can absolutely blur the lines at work.
Post # 7
Now? Only at work or work events. But I’ve also made quite a few friends from work. My prior job, I made 6 friends and we hang out often still. 2 of my bridesmaids are people I met at work.
Post # 8
Other than my 5 colleagues there aren’t too many other foreigners in my town so we hang out sometimes outside of work. Probably I hang out with one or another once a week on average But it’s an unusual environment to live in so things are different.
Post # 9
I don’t trust any of my work collegues any further than I can drop kick them. The office environment is very competative (caused by the head of the division) and people are constantly trying to get others in trouble over things that are said, no matter how innocous.
I only deal with them during the occasional team building or work party.
Post # 10
Never. I may have in the past, but now I have a long commute and I’d rather get home to my toddler.
Post # 11
I try to be pleasant since its nice to be nice… In general I keep my work life separate from my personal life… I’m in a satellite office and the only employee based out of it… I get assigned an assistant for field work on a job by job basis… I’m a bit isolated which suits me perfectly… I never attend work functions since my office is 3 hours from the main office.
Post # 12
Out of about 20 people in my department, I only have 3 close girlfriends I actually make plans with outside of work and talk to almost daily. Other than that we try and do a Christmas party with everyone outside of work.
Post # 13
before i got married i socialized a lot more with my coworkers. i also lived closer to where some of them lived.
now with marriage and kids and moves, i don’t socialize with them as much.
Post # 14
I voted occasionally, but it’s probably somewhere between that and all the time simply because we’re a busy bunch and it can be tricky to arrange times to get together.
Post # 15
I’m a teacher, so maybe its different? I dunno, but yes I do go out with my work buddies. Some were invited to my wedding. We do book club, go out to dinner etc. etc. Not saying that you shouldn’t be careful of who you befriend in the workplace…because you should…and that doesnt mean I tell them EVERYTHING, because I don’t. Some mystery is good. But in my case I feel like we need each other because the world seems to hate us, we are understaffed, over worked and no one really gets us. We also work in a high poverty school and there are just some days I need to lean on someone who has had the same kids in their classes because they understand.