Post # 1
I found a similar post asking this same question, but it was over 10 years old. I’m wondering how much people are spending in 2021. This summer and fall, we have EIGHT out-o- town wedding invitations. One of the weddings we will miss is for a close friend who was a bridesmaid. I haven’t seen her in person for 2 years and we’re not as close as we once were, but she was in my wedding. Most of the other weddings are for more distant friends and acquaintances. One invite is a clear last miniute, B list invite. So…what are people spending these days? Most people do not have traditional registries, so we need to send cash.
Post # 2
I was unable to attend a few weddings due to COVID restricting guest lists (i.e. uninvited when it went down to 10 people). I sent $150 for one with a close friend, and $100 for another.
I normally give $150 for myself when I attend weddings, more if close friend or family. We will double this if my partner attends.
** Canadian dollars
Post # 3
$25- $50 for a not close friend
more for close friend or family
Post # 4
If it’s a close friend or family member, I spend the same amount I would have if I were attending (around $100-$150, the common amount here).
If it’s someone fairly distant I’d spend $25-50, but it’s not generally expected if youre not that close.
Post # 5
I think 25-50 is typical. That’s what we received from a few people that didn’t make it.
Post # 7
I was married in 2019 and most people who didn’t attend my wedding sent $100
Post # 8
Same as others, around $150 for someone close. I got invited last minute to a co-worker’s wedding and I gave $75.
Post # 9
We would give the same amount as if we went. Although to be frank, if we had 8 to attend, that amount might be lower than in other years. The most recent wedding we went to were fairly close friends and we gave $150.
Post # 10
Same exact thing as if I am able to attend. Wedding gifts should be based on two things only, budget and closeness of the relationship. Weddings are not pay to play and the “cover your plate” mantra, which is implied by giving differently based on attendance, has no place in polite society.
Actually, if you look at it purely as a financial calculation, one would think you’d give a lot more since you’re potentially saving lots of money on travel, accomodations, clothing, a sitter etc. Fortunately, that’s not what a wedding gift is about.
Post # 11
- Wedding: April 2017 - City, State
It’s all relationship dependent. The most we give is $200 for family or very close friends.
Post # 12
I have a sliding scale on how close I am to them and give the same amount if I attend said wedding. I’m also Asian and giving money is very typical for us. It’s generally assumed that the money symbolically just changes hands and comes back. I do want to clarify I have NO expectations for anyone to give me $ at my wedding 🙂 The $ has definitely gone up now that I’m more financially secure so kudos to ppl inviting me now lol
People I haven’t talked to in years and am not that close to – nice card, no money
Work colleague/University friend or similar – $100
Close work friend – $150
Close friend / general relatives – $500
Best friends / favorite relatives – $650 to $1000 though most likely I’ll move heaven and earth to make these weddings
Post # 13
An invitation is not an invoice.
If I’m not going, I send a card. Period. (For a close relative I might send a present, in the $75. range.)
If people can be convinced that a wedding invitation requires sending a present, some of them will invite 1500 people, 1400 guaranteed not to come.
Post # 14
I gift the same whether I attend or not.
Post # 15
While it is not obligatory etiquette to send a gift to a wedding you don’t or can’t attend, or traditionally speaking one you do for that matter, I can’t imagine not being similarly moved to send a gift. The assumption is that wedding gifts are meant to be from the heart. And if I’m invited to a wedding it’s because I’m close to that person or their family. I’m not looking to save the cost of a gift on a technicality.