(Closed) How much do you tell your SO about your "special alone time "?

posted 4 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 2
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

bridesoon2:  Pretty much exactly the same as you! We both know the other does, but are pretty indifferent about it. 

Post # 3
944 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Im assuming this is talking about masturbating? Yes we both know we each do it, it doesn’t interfere with our sex life. I think it turns Darling Husband on if i tell him I got off on my own and I can’t wait for him to come home, that sort of thing. He masturbates in the shower sometimes if he’s up too early to wake me up. I guess it’s no big deal and it isn’t weird to either of us. FWIW we have been having sex for 9 years, so I guess we are just so comfortable with each other? I really can’t remember an awkward stage with masturbation though. 

Post # 4
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

We both know the other does it, as we work different work schedules (him nights-me days) so we both understand there are times we need to ‘get off’ and aren’t together but we don’t really talk about it just because we don’t need to. 

Post # 6
9526 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Nope. Neither of usually mention it because it doesn’t really matter

Post # 7
1325 posts
Bumble bee

I actually don’t think my husband does it… He’s never in the house when I’m not except for 2 hours 1 afternoon a week when he’s always (always always) in the middle of a massive gaming session when I get home, and we usually have sex when I get in. 

I on the other hand i leave at least 30 minutes after him and get home 30 minutes earlier… He’s never asked if I fool around by myself so I’ve never mentioned it… I’m particularly into it at the moment as I’m pregnant and find sex uncomfortable a lot of the time, so alone time is preferable. I’d tell him if he asked. 

Post # 8
3460 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

We talk about it openly and will have “alone time” when we are with each other. I can’t imagine being in a relationship where those sexual things aren’t discussed or are even hidden; it’s interesting how everyone’s relationships are so different!

Post # 9
2134 posts
Buzzing bee

We don’t discuss it. I’m sure he does. And I’m sure he knows I do. Something I think of as ‘private’ so I don’t talk about it

Post # 10
550 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016 - Theater

… am I the odd one out who sends a “I had playtime” text practically every time? Or at least I mention about it when she asks me about my day.

I always get giddy when I get to share with my partner and she sends me a winky smiley back.

(we’ve been together 12 years and it’s never been awkward or a hush-hush thing)

Post # 11
3242 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

ninakins:  I share. I often do it while we are in bed together. It’s not at all hidden. We both chitchat about it a lot. 

Post # 12
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

We actually talk about it really openly and I wouldn’t say very often, but fairly often. 

Post # 13
2122 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I share. I may even send the occasional text, but usually I’ll just tell him when he gets home from work and asks how my day was. He doesn’t share! Which is totally fine, it’s his body and it’s his private time. He used to tell me about it at the beginning of our relationship but not now. I love hearing about it, massive turn on. But if he doesn’t want to talk to me about it then that’s cool, it’s up to him.

Post # 14
3040 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

We don’t discuss it but we also don’t have special alone time. I’ve never found masturbating appealing whether with toys or not. Just does nothing for me. My partner said he doesn’t enjoy it either as it doesn’t do anything for him as well. 

Post # 15
1590 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Fiance has a far lower sex drive than me, so I tend to take care of business and not mention it because I don’t want him to feel pressured, or like he’s not doing enough for me. I honestly have no idea whether he does or not. I would generally assume yes but with his sex drive, probably not.

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