(Closed) How much does your FI helping with planning?

posted 8 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
6351 posts
Bee Keeper

Mine too!

It’s great. I’m a planner type of person but apparently NOT a wedding planner type of person. Without his help who knows how long it would take me to get the wedding off the ground. He’s not super wedding-focused either but we both want and are willing to work to put together something nice. I’d say he does solidly half the work ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

My fiance has a fair amount of input considering he’s been on straight nights for a month.  Unfortunately he hasn’t been able to come to every appointment with me, but he has input on the things he wants to give input on. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
46 posts
  • Wedding: October 2014

My Fiance wanted to help every step of the way- down to choosing flowers and bridesmaids dresses with me! However, unfortunately his job has taken him out of town for the next year… He moves back a month before we are due to be wed. I am trying to keep him included in every decision and process.. But I do have to make some executive decisions at appointments he can not attend

Post # 6
2521 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

He is definitely included and helpful in every decision.  However, it’s not something he loves and there are very few things he actually cares about.  

Post # 7
1285 posts
Bumble bee

Mine has been helpful, except with flowers. LOL  I ask him his opinion, (we are DIY, Sams Club) and he says “Babe, I’m a guy! They are flowers!”.

By The Way, a conversation months ago, he wasn’t aware flowers were even involved with weddings….


Post # 8
1097 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Fiance isn’t doing as much as I am, but I would consider him pretty involved. He comes with me to any wedding related appointment and weighs in on my thoughts/decisions. I do a lot more research and make the initial choices for most things, though he is heading a few wedding things (like the music and officiant). He also is helping with some of the labor; for example, he will be making the wood slices for our centerpieces ๐Ÿ™‚ I imagine he will also help with putting things together, setting up, etc. It works really well for us so far!

Post # 9
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013 - The front lawn of our church

@JacobsMama:  He didn’t do anything at all lol. But he said he was 100% willing to help if I needed it. I’m kind of a control freak and I knew that he really didn’t care what the wedding was like so I just did it myself. 

Post # 10
3270 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Mine agreed to go to the menu tasting (if he’s not working) so that’s good! I really think I would lose my mind if Fiance wanted to be involved lol I like having everything done my way, he likes having everything done my way and I have enjoyed doing every aspect myself. He says he just wants to marry me and could care less if we got married at an airport lol He showed up for e pics and picked his groomsmen so I’m satisfied! 

Post # 11
1990 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

before we were married DH and I lived 5,500 mi apart (me in CA and him in UK) so he didn’t come to many appointments but I included him more than a lot of my bridal party because the wedding was supposed to be about US and girls tend to give their input in regards to their own wedding ideas…

He was invovled in decision making but I took the reigns for all ideas and timelines and etc… I more presented him with scenarios and he chose which one he liked.. and then I took that into consideration when making decisions.  I considered his “non-negotiables” but found he just didn’t care either way on a lot of things… lol

We didn’t always end up going with what he wanted but he’s so easy going that at least we didn’t fight! haha


Post # 12
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

DH was very involved with the planning… He had opinions, questions, and ideas of his own.   However, there were things that he didn’t care about or do, such as my bouquet.

Post # 13
919 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Fiance has come to all of the vendor meeting with me, and helped pick the venue and caterer. But hen it comes to the little details, i’m mostly doing it myself. Fiance would be happy to help if I asked, I just tend to be more detail oriented than him and like things done my way. Its really my fault that Im a control freak, nothing against him.

Post # 14
8570 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Mine isn’t extremely helpful – that isn’t to say that he doesn’t do anything, he just isn’t interested in the little stuff.

He doesn’t care about decor, lighting, or invitations.. what the flowers look like.

He did care about a few aspects such as a dj, the food, cigar bar, photo booth – he is on the same page with me that we want to have the night of our lives.. and be great hosts to our guests.

Post # 15
1290 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2019

We’re in a LDR, so we only get to see each other on weekends, so he helps with what he can. If he was able I think he would help out a lot more, but he’s in the process of applying for a new job and a transfer to a new grad school in addition to the job and schooling he already has going on. I told him just to worry about all that and that I would take care of everything. ๐Ÿ˜‰

He basically helps when I need him to, like looking at our venue together and picking out our officiant and the music. I’m handling all of the detail things and making all of our paper items, but I’m a big planner, so I really don’t mind doing all of it.

Post # 16
9679 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

He does most of it. 

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