(Closed) How much is your FH helping with wedding planning?

posted 10 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
3423 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

mine got way more involved about a week ago, so three weeks before yey.  If was all me before.

Post # 4
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

Mine is super helpful. He handled the baker and DJ just about all on his own. He’ll give me an opinion on other things because he knows I need him to care. …So he makes one up. He was super opinionated regarding our centerpieces, which was helpful because I was lost! We’ve been good partners, but I hear that’s not always the case…

Post # 5
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

In the beginning I would ask my FH what he liked, etc. and all his ideas were lame. So I took over and just assigned him tasks. The only arguments we have had are over the house being cluttered with wedding stuff and feeling like we are hoarders. lol

His responsibilities have been/are:

1) Pick out his and groomsmen’s outfits. (which I ended up picking out the shirts anyway)

2) Pick his mother/son song.

3) Decide on and order the food

4) All things bar related including signature drinks

5) Arrange transportation.

All the other details, I have done and he is cool with it.

I learned a year ago when I started that it was better to assign him tasks and be done with it. Just be prepared to accept whatever he chooses on those tasks.

Post # 6
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@AntsyA: my Fiance is super laid back too. He didn’t want a big wedding, he would have bee fine with just me and him. Other than opinions, I don’t ask him for much. I just asked him and his mom for addresses. Well they only gave me like 5. I already sent out the STD and some of his family didn’t get one.

I told him “oh well, the people I want will make it” (DW for everyone but us). If they end up showing up for the wedding they don’t get to eat since we won’t have enough room. I know that seems really b*tchy, but I have been asking for these for over 6 months!

If they don’t care if their family gets invited, I’m not stressing over it. 

He helped pick out the venue, and he’s going to look at dresses with me (which I’m not thrilled about). We still can’t decide on a song. He says no to everything since he use to work at a lot of weddings. 

He’s mostly helpful though! 

Post # 7
778 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Mine has been wonderfull, any ideas I have for DIY’s he helps make them work and helps with any planning help I need. He is right in there with me every step of the way. He helps big time with de-stressing me as well.

Post # 9
2393 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@AntsyA:  I know just how you feel!!!  My Fiance is WAY TOO INVOLVED.  The other night we had an hour long argument over which picture frames to choose for our table numbers.  He thought my selection was too modern. 

It is SO frustrating showing him options only for him to dislike all of them.  I think he has no clue how much work goes into everything, before I show him the options.  It has created a lot of arguments, and I have been calling him groomzilla. 

Is your Fiance by chance over 30?  I recently read an article about “older” grooms wanting much more involvement in wedding planning.   Mine is 36, and you would think it’s all about him!

I’ve basically stopped asking him for his opinions, and because he’ll never take initiative on his own, I should be ok.  

Post # 10
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Who? lol Chile please that man has no interest in planning the weddin.g He just wants to know when and where to show up and that’s cool because I get to do what I want! *bbm dance* lol

Post # 15
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Fiance has been AMAZING! We have done most of the printing of any paper items ourselves, and as he is a computer mastermind I just let him do most of those tasks (invitations, inserts, photo cards, table numbers, programs, etc). We collaborated on designs and then I let him go since he is much better at ironing out the details on projects like that.  He is also making our photo booth, which is a huge undertaking. He has also been planning most of the honeymoon and I know he has a few surprises up his sleeve… For the most part I have been organizing most of the tasks and handing things off to him when I think he can do a better job or if I don’t have enough time. He has been my right hand and there is no way I would still be sane if it wasn’t for him!

Post # 16
65 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I didn’t want any help because I’m sort of a control freak(something i found out during the planning process). So, I settled for him to help pay instead. LOLLaughing

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