Post # 31
My fiancé and I looked at rings together and I picked out the ring I wanted, without knowledge of whether and when he bought it, and also no idea when he was going to propose as a result. If you phrase it in a way that is just you two looking at the style of rings she like, without committing to buying or proposing yet, that might take away the waiting anxiety you are worried about.
Post # 32
What shape stone does she want? I think I’ve seen lan created diamonds in every shape before.
Post # 33
Me: “So I’d like your help making a decision…”
Her: “No. Surprise me.”
Me: “Well, it’s not even a specific decision, just a decision about decisions…”
Her: “Surprise me.”
I guess that leaves options 3 and 4 😉
Post # 34
i gave input on my ring. i knew the date of my proposal, but the execution was a huge surprise.
Post # 35
misslucy : emerald cut. They do exist, but the selection is extremely limited. And of course you have to be very picky on clarity, because it’s an EC, and pickier on color than you’d be for a round brilliant… and I don’t want it too tiny, nor do I want to spend ungodly amounts of money… which leaves maybe 4 stones on Brilliant Earth.
CleanOrigin does have more, at least in the <1 ct range, but by the time I found them I’d also found moissanite. I ordered a few EC moissanites to see in person, and they’re gorgeous. I don’t even want a diamond at this point. But if she decides a diamond is a must, then I’ll get one. I don’t mind dropping $300-400 nonrefundable on a moissanite, but I’m not paying $2-3K nonrefundable on a diamond without her input.
Post # 36
With your updates, I would say go for option 3. It sounds like she would appreciate the effort you would make to pick out the ring completely yourself. I’d just make sure you are open to her wanting to switch some things out to fit her own preferences.
My SO is proposing with a stand in ring, and then we’ll design the ring together afterwards. I actually plan to use the stand in ring for when we’re traveling and I don’t want to wear my expensive engagement ring, so I’ll still use it as an engagement ring at times and it will still be special. That is something you can consider if you do decide to go with option 4.
But based on her being adament about you surprising her and her expressing pleasure at you being able to make large decisions yourself, I would tend to lean towards option 3 and just completely surprising her.
Post # 37
sarusarunna : Yeah, I was thinking of getting something like an Enso Elements silver ring she could use while hiking, doing trail work, etc. So that’s an option. I’m not sure she’d find much use for it, though – she’s used to taking off all rings in such circumstances.
And there’s just something so compelling about proposing with the ring. Sigh.