Post # 1
I feel like every time we pick something for our wedding, family change our minds. They go on and on why we should do something completely different and then tell me ‘but it is your wedding’. So I change my mind, and after going in circles I get back to what I wanted to do in the first place.
Did you have the same problem?
How much of an influence was your family?
Who spoke out the most to try and change things?
Post # 3
i hate that. “do what you want, it’s your wedding” in one breath, but “oh no, no one will like that” in the next.
my mom has been very opinionated about food. we’ve actually fought over it. sigh.
Post # 4
My mom lived in Asia so my Mother-In-Law was the one who spoke out the most in regards to the wedding
Post # 5
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Ummm…. we made it clear that everyone was to keep their mouths shut unless we specifically asked for their opinion. I had groomed my parents for a decade by telling them that if I ever got married, it would be a courthouse shindig and I’d tell them about it after it was done. That sufficiently lowered their expectations to 0, and they were just happy I was having a wedding at all. And since Mr. LK and I were footing the bill for everything we gave a hoot about, no one really had the right to voice their opinion anyway. I really think it’s all about how independent you are before and during the planning. If you’ve already fully flown the nest, established your own life independent from your family, and pay your own way, people tend to leave you the eff alone. And that was exactly what we wanted. 🙂
Post # 6
I have had the most conflict with my mom and dad who have been very opinionated about some things. I am lucky that overall they defer to my taste on decor and things like that, but they have very specific opinions about food, drinks, etc. It used to really bother me, but honestly, as an older bride (29) I have come to believe that it’s a misconception your wedding day is all about you. I know some will disagree, but once I changed my frame of reference, I actually started to really enjoy that my parents cared so much and I really started to want to incorporate their ideas. I would have died if you would have told me a few years ago that my wedding would be family style instead of plated…but you know what? Now I throw my hands in the air and think about how much fun that will be and how it will set a relaxed tone for all our guests to kick back and enjoy! And, for a lot of the issues over which we disagreed I found that checking my attitude and talking to them calmly has helped us to reach compromise and come up with even better ideas than either of us originally had.
Post # 7
I have had to stand my ground pretty hard to keep my Mom from completely steamrollering me. She’s won a few, but we end up fighting a lot because she is so controlling.