(Closed) How much of your past (photos with exes, etc do you keep)

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 77
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I don’t intentionally keep anyyhing, but I have a lot of gifts and things (make up, stuffed animals, my hair straightener, etc). As PPs said, they don’t have any sentimental value, they’re things I like. I threw out most of the notes and letters right after I broke up with them because I felt bad looking at them and thinking about how I hurt them.

As for Facebook stuff, if it’s up there, it’s up there. I My ex boyfriends were good friends and nice people, just because we didn’t work out as a couple doesn’t mean they weren’t a significant part of my life. I fully support staying friends with exes, as long as no one feels awkward. If they want to untag things because they’re uncomfortable, that’s fine, but Facebook just isn’t a priority for me.

The one thing I’ll never get rid of is the tattoo my ex paid for because, ya know, it’s a tattoo…lol

Post # 78
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think it’s okay to keep photo but not to prominently display them. Say for instance someone got married while they were young. All of their grandparents and older relatives were still alive and you had a wedding album full of happy memory with people you love. Flash forward ten years. You are long since divorced, all of your older relatives are dead and you have found someone new. Should you really have to destroy an album of precious family memories just because they occured at your wedding to someone else?

 

Having said that I think it’s completely inappropriate to have pictures of ex’s hung around the house and I don’t see any neccessity for keeping love notes what-so-ever.

Post # 79
Member
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I never keep anything once a relationship has ended.  EVERYTHING (photos, notes, etc.) gets thrown away, destroyed, etc.  It’s my way of moving on completely and not dwelling on the past.

Post # 80
Member
8469 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

No. I don’t see a reason for it on both our ends. But the only photo I do have stored in a box somewhere is my prom photo. It’s not like I’ll have another prom!

Post # 81
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Most of my past relationships didn’t involve gifts and pictures.  I’ve thrown away a bunch of notes because I just saw no reason to keep them but I did that when I dated whoever wrote them.  I was told when I was younger I’d regret not keeping them but I don’t and I doubt I ever will.  I do own maybe a few things that I guess should remind me of the past relationships but if I look at them I don’t see my exes.

My fiance is the same way (except his parents have a couple of photos of him and one of his exes).  I don’t mind.

Post # 82
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
@GeorgiaBride5:  I never keep anything once a relationship has ended.  EVERYTHING (photos, notes, etc.) gets thrown away, destroyed, etc.  It’s my way of moving on completely and not dwelling on the past.

 
Me too. I’ve never seen the point to be honest. Why would you want those reminders around once you’re over that person? If my Fiance had insisted on keeping ex stuff in our house I would have assumed that he wasn’t over them.

Post # 83
Member
2564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I have a box of stuff that’s buried somewhere in my mom’s basement…

FH has old photo albums, including the wedding album, from his first marriage.  Ugh.  They are stashed away in the basement and the only reason I am not completely stabby over those are because there are photos of his late mother in them.

Post # 84
Member
1285 posts
Bumble bee

I have my old wedding photos of me and my xhusband.  Why? Because we have kids together. I don’t feel right to burn them or throw them in the garbage. My children have every right to those photographs, and ones of them, and family photos, of all of us when they were younger.  I have a lot of “momento” items that I have set aside to give to my children when they get older. My Fiance doesn’t mind. He has pictures and items of his son’s mom in boxes.  We cherish the past,  it’s what made us the people we are today. 

 

Post # 85
Member
278 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I have one necklace an ex gave me that I wear sometimes. I like the necklace, and that ex and I are still friends. 

Otherwise, everything from all of my exes is combined in a single shoebox at my dad’s house. It feels weird to try to erase the past by burning it or something… we’re talking YEARS of my life. Sometimes I just want to see old pictures of myself, and 90% of them have my exes in them. 😛

My Fiance is a hobby photographer so he has some beautiful pictures of his ex in his online portfolio. I’m not a huge fan, but I understand why he doesn’t want to delete them, since they do show off his skill as a photographer. 

He tolerates my shoebox and necklace, I tolerate his photos. We also both have old pictures of us and our exes on Facebook. 

Post # 86
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Neither of us kept anything related to our exes.  No need to remember them, they’re not part of our lives anymore.

Post # 87
Member
1443 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

From my 11 years with ex-hubby, photos and video (we have a daughter together). Everyone else, I’ve gotten rid of everything, including deleting all digital photos.

Post # 88
Member
7368 posts
Busy Beekeeper

opps already answered.

Post # 89
Member
2597 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@paulabrochu:  That is over the top and would bug me. 

There are photos and keepsakes I still have.  I need to organize ALL my old pictures and keepsakes from everyone and when I do, I’ll probably throw some out but still keep some.  I was married previously for quite some time so I do keep some albums and stuff because that was a big chunk of my life.  I don’t look at them very often though. 

My husband has a box or two of photographs and I assume there are some photos/keepsakes around.  That doesn’t bother me either, really. 

Post # 90
Member
2546 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’ve got a few pics and love notes in an old scrapbook I made when I graduated Highschool. Maybe 4-5 pages max. Fiance also has a big box of his old stuff, graduation pics/id cards/licenses/etc that includes some pics of his exes. I think it’s kinda fun when we’re cleaning to look through it- I didn’t even know him at that point in his life so it’s intersting to hear the stories with each picture. But we’re both pretty open & confident in our relationship and try to talk about exes every now & again to rehash why we’re both happy we ended up together & to re-fresh some of those difficult lessons learned along the way. Were both very good friends with his ex from college and I’ve got zero issues with him hanging out with her without me as well. That was 15 years ago, they’re both different people now, and they were great friends before & after the breakup that recently reconnected. I will admit I was really worried about it until I met her & now I could careless. 

Post # 91
Member
1248 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand

As soon as any bf and I broke up, I was on a rampage throwing away photos, etc. To each his own, but I pretty much refuse to be friends with any of my exes; if I wasn’t friends with them prior to the relationship I don’t see any reason to be friends after. The only past guy I remained friendly with for a while was more of a hook-up, so there were never any real feelings involved. 

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