(Closed) How much of your wedding did you pay for yourself?

posted 7 years ago in Money
  • poll: What percentage of your wedding did you pay yourself?








  • Post # 32
    782 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    @freshflowers:  I have yet to be married, however my mom told me that I could choose between A or B.

    A. She contributes a total of 20K, if it’s a Destination Wedding, then that will include her and my fathers flights and accomodations and mine and FI’s flights and accomodations for 2 weeks, then whatever is left over will be wedding $. If it isn’t a Destination Wedding, then the 20K can go completely towards the wedding.

    B. She gives us $15-20K to put towards a house, and we put off the wedding for a year or 2.

    She told us this last week, and since we’ll need a new place to live by June of this year, we chose B 🙂

    It’s kind of nice because it puts the stress of wedding planning and being homeless on hold. Then when the time comes, we’ll be paying for the wedding ourselves and we’ll only have to worry about our own opinions and ideas regarding our wedding and guest list!

    ETA: I just wanted to add that for us, getting married wouldn’t change a whole lot other than how others perceive our relationship.. We have been together 5 years as of this march, and We’ve lived together for 4/5 years. We are technically already considered married as well, because we are common-law. (When you live with someone you are in a relationship with for 2+ years) So we’re already considered married by the province, and honestly, our friends and family are all very supportive of our relationship and would not see us any differently as they did before.

    Post # 33
    2455 posts
    Buzzing bee

    We had a small destination wedding and paid for almost everything ourselves. 

    It came to $12,000, we paid for all but $500 (my mom bought the dress). We even paid for our parents’ trips. 

    Post # 34
    806 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Wedding cost 10k or so….we paid for about 85% on our own.  Parents paid for my dress, and a few odds and ends. 

    Post # 35
    2211 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Including rings and rehearsal dinner, our wedding is looking like it will be around 19K (dang!) unless we can spend less than our alotted budget for a few things we don’t have booked yet.  I think it’s possible we could do it for as little as 17K, but I’m not holding my breath.

    My parents have generously contributed 12K, and we’re paying for the rest.  FI’s family has not offered to help financially.  It’s his second marriage (but first wedding) and he’s indicated that money is tight for them, so it’s understandable.

    We’re also paying for our honeymoon, which I estimate will come out to another 8K.  So, wedding and honeymoon total will be about 27K.

    And yeah, seeing that all written out is kind of frightening.

    Post # 36
    18 posts
    • Wedding: July 2015

    My parents are contributing 5k plus the dress, his parents are doing 5k plus the rehearsal dinner and then we’re covering the rest.

    Since we’re having around 250 people, our wedding is clocking in at right around 30k. So that leaves 20k for us to take care of – which is why we’re waiting until July 2015 so we can pay for it all in cash!

    Post # 37
    5373 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Our wedding will end up costing around 15k (not including the rings or honeymoon). My Fiance and I have contributed about $1500 towards the wedding, paid for our rings ($1000), and are paying for our honeymoon ($1500). So we’ve paid about 10% of the wedding. The rest has been paid for by my parents, who have been saving for my wedding since I was born (:

    Post # 38
    3041 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    We are paying about 80% — my dad and mom contributed what they could, but the rest of the bill is on us!


    Post # 39
    881 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Inclusive of our honeymoon and wedding rings our wedding will cost about $20,000 give or take 1,500ish (depends on the final RSVP count so we shoud know soon!) My dad gave us a monetary gift for our engagement that we are using toward the wedding so while he tells people he isn’t helping us at all (since he said we could use the money for whatever) really he helped a lot with his gift. He gave us 7,500 so we are paying for about 60% and my dads gift covers about 30%. We expect to spend more actually on the honeymoon but I just counted the cost of the cruise accomadations and shore excursions in that number. 

    ETA: My Fiance parents and my parents are splitting the rehearsal dinner for around 45  people (lots of out of towners) and they will each be paying around $350


    Post # 40
    1081 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    so far, Fiance and I are on our own. Future Mother-In-Law has always up front and told us she will contribute 5K for the banquet. And when she found out price has increased so much over the years. She mentioned she will help 10K but I would stick with the orginal 5K. 

    So far, I haven’t heard her mentioning but I don’t want to hold her accountable… although my parents wasn’t too happy that I keep mentioning “our side of friends and family” helping us out in wedding (role etc. )  It is our culture that the groom family fund 100% for the wedding…. but if I get something from Future Mother-In-Law, I’m grateful. If not, I’m ok too.. cuz’ she is really old already. (she is turning 80 this year) 

    We are budgeting at 30K CAD for everything, not including wedding bands, engagement ring and honeymoon.  I have a feeling at the end of the day, it should be around 31-32K and we will have a 200 ppl wedding…… 


    Post # 41
    10450 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    We could easily have done it 100% ourselves, but both of our parents wanted to pay so we said awesome, thanks! We have purchased pretty generous travel vouchers for them both as thank you though. Total is about $25k but rings and honeymoon not included. That’s all us. 

    Post # 42
    12244 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    My parents paid for my dress!

    And since the wedding was 4K, and my dress was 2K, they effectually paid for 33% of the wedding!

    Post # 43
    9948 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    First Marriage (circa 1980), and my family went the “traditional” route.  My Parents paying for the Reception Hall & Catering.  They also paid for my Bridal Gown & Accessories.  And for 2 Sedan Cars… 1 for my Bridesmaids, and one for Myself (with Dad to the Church, with Groom to the Reception)

    His Parent’s paying for the Rehearsal Dinner.

    My Ex-Hubby & I covered off the items that were on the Groom’s Traditional List (as well as the Bride’s)

    * ALL Wedding Stationery (Invitations, Reply Cards, Thank You Cards & Postage Costs)

    * Bride’s Engagement Ring & Wedding Band
    *Groom’s Wedding Ring

    * Groom’s Gift to the Bride
    *Bride’s Gift to the Groom

    * Groom’s Attire

    * Groom’s Thank You Gifts to his Attendants
    * Bride’s Thank You Gifts to her Attendants

    * Bridal Luncheon for the Bridesmaids

    * Bride’s Bouquet
    * Bout for the Groom

    * Bride’s Going Away Corsage

    * Bouquets for the Bridesmaids & Petals for the Flower Girl
    * Bouts for Groom’s Attendants & Pillow for the Ring Bearer

    * Corsages for Immediate Family Members (Mothers, Grand Mothers, God Mothers and such)
    * Bouts for Immediate Family Members (Fathers, Grand Fathers, God Fathers and such)

    * All Clothing Costs for the Flower Girl (Dress & Shoes)
    * Tuxedo Rental for Ring Bearer

    * Officiant’s Fee and / or Church Fees / Donation

    * Transportation for Groom & Best Man from the Accommodations to the Ceremony Site
    * Transportation for the Groomsmen / Users from the Accommodations to the Ceremony Site

    * Transporaton of the Best Man, Groomsmen / Ushers from the Ceremony Site to the Reception and from the Reception back to the Accommodations

    * Accommodations for the Groom’s Attendants (2 Nights)
    * Accommodations for the Bride’s Attendants (2 Nights)

    * Accommodations for the Groom’s Parents (2 Nights)
    * Accommodatons for the Groom’s Siblings (2 Nights)

    * Expenses of the Honeymoon

    * We also paid for the DJ at the Wedding Reception Dance

    * And ALL the Alcohol at the Reception, as my Parents are non-drinkers and quite content to have had a Dry Wedding… we weren’t.  We funded a Cocktail Hour – Wine with Dinner – and Bubbly for Toasting.

    As is the custom in Canada of Co-Hosting be acceptable, we made arrangements to pay the Bartender and have the Bar available, but Guests paid their own way.

    Overall, I’d say that things probably worked out 50/50 for both sides of this equation… Us and My Parents.

    But I don’t know precisely, because it would have been impolite to ask such a Question.  We were very grateful tho.

    — — —

    This time round…

    Mr TTR & I are both Encores & Older.  We paid 100% for everything on our own.  (Wedding – Honeymoon – Back Home Reception).  We spent the bulk of our Budget “technically” on ourselves as we chose to Elope to a Destination Wedding and follow it up with a Caribbean Honeymoon cruise.  No regrets, it was perfect for us to Elope as Encores.


    Post # 44
    1723 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @freshflowers:  We were not expecting any help and decided to have a long engagment to make sure we could afford our wedding.  Our wedding is going to cost around 30k and our honeymoon will probably end up being about 10k by the time everything is said and done.  My parents gifted us 10k to help us, which was a big surprise!  We tried not to take it since I feel bad taking money from them…but my dad told me I didn’t have a choice. LOL It was still a big help…they’re basically going to be paying for our honeymoon! 🙂

    Post # 45
    52 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Mine is mega-cheap because we’re getting married at a registry office, mid-week and with no reception. I’m literally paying for it myself because I was the one who said “We can move it forward and still save for a mortgage” (reasons are possibly for another thread), and since my Fiance has a lot more outgoings than I do, all I’ve asked of him is to pay his half for the fees when we go to give our Notice of Intent. My mother paid for my wedding ring, which again is mega cheap because I only wear silver and don’t care for diamonds. Since it’s my birthday soon, she said it was an early present.

    Not sure about the total as I’m picking up little bits and bobs here and there as I go.

    Post # 46
    4520 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Fiance and I will pay for about a third

    Eta: not counting the honeymoon, which we will pay for

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