(Closed) How much say did your bridesmaids have in their dresses?

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: BM dresses - how much say did you give your girls?

    100% of the decision was theirs

    I just gave them the colour - they picked the dress

    I gave them colour & basic style/cut but they picked the dress

    I picked a few dresses and let them choose

    I decided on the dress

  • Post # 17
    422 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    misskittykakes burlap sack dresses! now theres a budget we can all get behind lol

    Post # 18
    7573 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I had a particulary style of dress that I wanted (50’s style) which I knew suited my Bridesmaid or Best Man as she wears similar dresses. I also picked the colour (black) so she would wear it again but we looked and chose together. I also paid for the dress/accessorise/shoes etc etc.

    Post # 19
    84 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @Laitka:  I would like it if they look nice together, but other than that I told them to wear whatever. Then they promptly started arguing about long versus short dresses with each other…oh well!

    Post # 20
    9 posts
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I decided on all the dresses, but I also paid for all of them.

    They all love them so it’s a win!

    Post # 21
    757 posts
    Busy bee

    My daughter picked the dress (I am the MOB) we asked the Bridesmaids opinion on it in regard to style and colour and they all loved it.  

    I am paying to dress the 5 bridesmaids – dress, shoes, flowers, jewellery, hair and make-up. They are all loverly girls and are enjoying being pampered.



    Post # 22
    1595 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I wanted them to all be happy, but eventually I had to put my foot down.  Five months of looking and we were getting absolutely nowhere.  I don’t know that my 4 bridesmaids could have been more different in style, body type, etc.  Also, they were spread out throughout the country.  I eventually just chose an infinity wrap dress ordered through Etsy, and requested that they wrap it in a way to have straps for the ceremony (Catholic Mass wedding).  For the reception, strapless was fine–and I did have a bridesmaid who made a point of running into the bathroom and rewrapping her dress every hour of the reception, just to be goofy!  

    Post # 23
    237 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I had a specific idea about the dresses (different shades on a spectrum of purple, and different dresses for each girl) so I gave them a choice of one of four colours, and then gave them the choice of the entire Alfred Sung line of cocktail length dresses. Luckily for me each of them chose a different colour and a different dress, but of similar enough style that it’ll work. I did that because they’re all such different shapes, sizes, colours and styles that one dress wouldn’t have worked, and I wanted them to have something that they were comfortable in that they would wear again. 

    Post # 24
    74 posts
    Worker bee

    I’m not engaged yet… still waiting. But I have already picked my bridesmaid dresses. This is going to sound harsh but I am having the overall say. There are 8 of them. All different shapes and sizes and all have different styles and one of them is male. If I allowed them to pick they woudl never agree. It’s just easier. I have already had one argument with a close friend because we were talking about weddings and I happened to mention that I want all my Maids in flat shoes. I will be in flats. It messes around with dress alterations and some of them arn’t comfortable in heels and they will on their feet all day and two of them or young teens. Putting them in heels would be a trajic mess.
    I have two styles of dresses (excluding the male who would be my ‘Man of Honour’) 5 of the girls will be in floor length, emerald green and fishtale cut and my sisters will be in ivory ball gowns (not to big of a skirt though).

    Sometimes you have to get firm and you can’t please everyone. It’s your wedding, your photographs. When my maids get married, I’ll wear what ever they want me too.

    Post # 25
    125 posts
    Blushing bee

    I have picked neutral colour (grey) and a designer they are all happy with and from there they are going to choose the cut/style they’d like to wear. So the colour/fabric will be the same, but as there are over 50 options they can pick from, there is plenty of choice and I’m sure there will be something to suit each maid. The designer’s prices vary from $65 to $800 depending on the style, so they can spend as much or as little as they like and most of the choices are under the $170 mark.


    From there, they can wear whatever shoes they’re comfortable in (last thing I want is their feet squished into something that hurts all day) and suit their dress, whatever hair they feel makes them look their best (no cost, as a friend is a hairdresser and is doing our hair as her wedding gift to us) and I’ll gift them their jewelry, make up session and flowers. 

    Post # 26
    121 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I chose the dresses and then made sure they all approved. I took a practical approach. They will be able to re-use their dresses.

    Post # 27
    498 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    We all went to the bridal shop together. We skimmed through the dresses. Each bridesmaid tried on 2 or 3 dresses of our choosing (I kinda said yay or nay to ones they picked out). Then they all tried on the top two and they agreed on one of those two. They all seemed happy with the dress we picked. I picked the color.

    Post # 28
    202 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I told them what colour it had to be, and that I’d prefer from the same designer (so the colour would be consistent). I have 5 bms and we have 3 different dresses, but all the same length so they look very good together.

    Post # 29
    982 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I’m picking the color/fabric and designer, but they can choose whatever dress they like. I have 9 bridesmaids all with very different body shapes, so its very difficult to find one dress that works for all of them. I want them to love their dresses and feel comfortable in them.

    Post # 30
    633 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I let them know the fabric I wanted, it had to be floor length, and in a fall color. That was it. They did an awesome job. My Maid/Matron of Honor is excited to wear hers for formal night on a cruise she has coming up, and another Bridesmaid or Best Man is wearing hers to the ballet in Feb.

    YAY for them being able to re-wear them!

    Post # 31
    79 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    My dress shop is about an hour away from civilization in southeast Ohio.  I tried on a few different dresses and ultimately let my Maid/Matron of Honor pick the dress she liked the best.  I was thrilled because it was the dress I liked the best as well and our tastes are usually different.

    My only stipulation was I wanted turquoise, some sort of strap(s) knee or tea length, and chiffon fabric.  We ended up going with the Allure 1233.  It’s a beautiful dress!  I can’t wait to see what my girls look like in it!


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