Post # 1
A close friend of my parents will be the minister for our wedding ceremony. I am wondering how many of you out there have had friend of the family or their own minister/priest perform the ceremony. Did you make a donation or did you all discuss payment beforehand? I figure I will discreetly hand him a check for a donation (because I know he will say he’s doing it for free) but not exactly sure about how much to give.
Post # 3
Our chapel recommends at least $50 on top of the fee (the ceremony is $200)
Post # 4
Most places that ask for "donations" are still looking to get a couple hundred dollars from you. I would donate what it would cost to book an officiant on your own. Living in Ca, the rate for me would be around $300, but I know its different in other states.
Post # 5
We are getting married in a my home church in the Chicago suburbs and are planning to give a donation to our pastor of $100 (the church costs $120 to use).
I think anything between $100-$300 is appropriate. $50 seems a little on the low end (to me)
Post # 6
My church recommends $100. Hope that helps.
Post # 7
- Wedding: March 2009 - Beach Social Hall
We are giving our officiant $100.
Post # 8
My church asks for $500, but in addition to that amount we will be giving our priest an additional amount, probably $100.
Post # 9
My FI’s family is really close to our officiant, who was my former pastor, but with whom I lost touch over the years, so Fiance is handling that. I think FI’s family is going to pay for him and his family to fly from Indiana to North Carolina and pay for their accommodations. I don’t know if they will give an additional donation. We’re not having it in a church, so there are no requirements along those lines. We/They’re just doing what feels right for friends.
Post # 10
- Wedding: February 2009 - Small church ceremony with mountain-view log cabin reception
we have to give 250 to the actual church and like you, our officiant is a close family friend so we’ll give him an additional 200 as a donation
Post # 11
Our officiant was also a close friend who refused to let us pay him, so we slipped him a thank you card with $100 bill in it during the reception.
Post # 12
Thanks everybody. Lots of good advice, it was very helpful. I think I will slip some cash inside a thank you card for him at the reception, too.
Post # 13
I’m glad you asked this question, I have the same concern. Our pastor is a close family friend whom I have known since childhood, and since we are not getting married in a church we weren’t sure how much to give as a donation either.